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i dont want my babies father in the room... jessicamarie_92 Due June 14; 16 kids; Whittier, California 136 posts
24th Jan '13

Him and i are no longer together and we don't talk. When we still did he would rather go out drinking then buy things for the baby. He doesn't want to help me and i'm ok with that but for him to demand to be in the room is ridiculous to me! i can only have 2 people in the birthing room and it will be my doula and my mom. it is MY labor and i need to be focused and calm. My mom agrees with me but now his parents are demanding i let him and HIS mom in when i cant stand either of them! I dont know what to tell them.

BαtMαɳ Secret Bat Cave, CA, United States 53489 posts
24th Jan '13

tell them NO. And make sure you tell the people in L&D when you get there that you don't want anyone visiting while you are in labor. The choice isn't up to them.

user banned Due January 20; 33 kids; North Carolina 14662 posts
24th Jan '13

Don't call him or let him know when you go to the hospital. And make sure the staff knows that you do not want him or his family there. They should make sure and honor your wishes

Redneck Mamma North Carolina 8746 posts
24th Jan '13

Tell them to go screw themselves. If neither of them have tried to help in any way they dont deserve it plus if you can only have two people in the room your doula would not be in there if they both are. When DD was born I told hospital staff to not let my ex his parents or any family members near the nursery and gave names.

user banned Indiana 33802 posts
24th Jan '13

So dont tell him when you go into labor. You have the right to refuse anyone being in your room. If they do find out, tell the nurses you dont want them in there.

Doodles mommy Due July 31; 2 kids; Starke, Florida 1543 posts
24th Jan '13

Tell them to kiss your ass.

Linz Field Due March 15; Wichita, Kansas 137 posts
24th Jan '13
Quoting BαƚMαɳ:" tell them NO. And make sure you tell the people in L&D when you get there that you don't want anyone visiting while you are in labor. The choice isn't up to them. "


i agree.

BrookeT Due April 26; Fort McMurray, Alberta 440 posts
24th Jan '13

I would just say no and if they cause problems inform the hospital that you informed them that they are not wanted there and they have been causing problems because of that so they are aware of them possibly causing trouble. Your the one having a baby and its about your comfort not anyone elses wants.

Amy {OneGirl, TwoBoys} 3 kids; Cincinnati, Oh, United States 24247 posts
24th Jan '13

dont tell him when you are in labor. call him after baby is born

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55982 posts
24th Jan '13
Quoting jessicamarie_92:" Him and i are no longer together and we don't talk. When we still did he would rather go out drinking ... [snip!] ... me but now his parents are demanding i let him and HIS mom in when i cant stand either of them! I dont know what to tell them."



You certainly don't have to allow his mother in at all. I don't know where she would think she has any right. As for him, well it is is child too. I can understand your frustration but, hopefully things will change between the two of you before baby comes.



As for what to tell them, simple "No". That works just fine.

anonymom + 1.5 2 kids; West Virginia 10774 posts
24th Jan '13

I just didn't tell my ex until the baby was born and I was ready to deal with the bullshit the inevitably would follow. You need support, not bullshit.

YoyoMa 2 kids; 10 angel babies; Nowhere, HI, United States 2163 posts
24th Jan '13

I agree with what everyone is saying. You need to let the hospital know when you check in. If you alert them to the fact that they are possibly going to cause trouble, they might have some options for you so that they don't just show up and try to get in the room (maybe they could list you under an alias or make sure that no one gives away your room number, etc).



It is his child too and he will be missing out on a huge experience, but I'm sure you've already considered all of this. If he messed up that bad, then screw them and good for you mama! Good luck.

YoyoMa 2 kids; 10 angel babies; Nowhere, HI, United States 2163 posts
24th Jan '13
Quoting jessicamarie_92:" Him and i are no longer together and we don't talk. When we still did he would rather go out drinking ... [snip!] ... me but now his parents are demanding i let him and HIS mom in when i cant stand either of them! I dont know what to tell them."

Had to add... HELL NO to his mom's request. Who demands that? I didn't even let my own mother in during labor because I wanted it to be just me and my husband and she gave birth to me.

Sugga mama to four 4 kids; Utah 1111 posts
24th Jan '13

i was wondering the same thing, but yet the ex claims he has some sort of right to be there, and he threaten that because he is the father he has every legal right to be there lol

Redneck Mamma North Carolina 8746 posts
24th Jan '13
Quoting Sugga mama to four:" i was wondering the same thing, but yet the ex claims he has some sort of right to be there, and he threaten that because he is the father he has every legal right to be there lol"


There is no law that says you have to let anyone in the delivery room...