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My Idiot Brother Riley+Abby Due October 4; 1 child; Toronto, Ontario 2420 posts
25th Jan '13

I just got a call from my Mom...



Apparently my idiot of a brother went and got a 19 year old college student pregnant...He's a 28 year old child...I guess he called my Mom to tell her about it, expecting her to be sympathetic to his moronicy (No clue if that's a word!) or something. The story I got was something along the lines of him talking her into the whole thing, and then not using the proper protection for her sake.



Now she's pregnant, and guess who doesn't want to take any responsibility for it?



Dang, I want to slap him across the head. I'm just curious, if she does decide to have the kid, is there anything that she can do to make him take responsibility for it? I have no idea about these sorts of things...So I figured I would ask, seeing as there are some single Mama's on BG. Can she do anything to make him own up to being the kid's father?

Minion Due September 30 (girl); 2 kids; ., GA, United States 21681 posts
status 25th Jan '13

She could take him to court and sue for child support.

gbkj3 Due June 5 (girl); 2 kids; Illinois 36 posts
25th Jan '13

She could get child support. Stepping up and being the father the baby needs no one can make him do, he is the only one that can make himself step up.

Riley+Abby Due October 4; 1 child; Toronto, Ontario 2420 posts
25th Jan '13
Quoting gbkj3:" She could get child support. Stepping up and being the father the baby needs no one can make him do, he is the only one that can make himself step up."


Would child support be a set amount or some sort of a percentage? Or is that a variance from case to case?



What upsets me is that I know him way too well...There is no way he'll step up and take care of that baby, let alone that girl. It would cramp his style, or some bullshit or another.



lacTAYtor. ☮ 3 kids; North Carolina 4496 posts
25th Jan '13

She could get child support so he'll have to support the kid financially but no one can make him be there (as a father figure) for the little one.

3 little monsters 3 kids; Olathe, Colorado 50990 posts
25th Jan '13

Give him some time, lots of guys are man-children until life slaps them in the face. He might man up, don't discount him yet. In any case she can go for child support.

Riley+Abby Due October 4; 1 child; Toronto, Ontario 2420 posts
25th Jan '13
Quoting 3 little monsters:" Give him some time, lots of guys are man-children until life slaps them in the face. He might man up, don't discount him yet. In any case she can go for child support. "


I'm hoping there's still some shred of maturity in him...but he's been slapped a couple times already. It really hasn't seemed to do anything for him. I'm hoping that this will make him man up, but I'm not counting on it.



And it annoys me that there's a 19 year old girl out there who's dealing with my brother's ignorance, and will ultimately be the one dealing with the repercussions of his actions.



I'm so tempted to get my Mom to wrangle her last name and number out of him...find out if there's anything I can do to help her out.

3 little monsters 3 kids; Olathe, Colorado 50990 posts
25th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Colton's Butterfly:</b>" I'm hoping there's still some shred of maturity in him...but he's been slapped a couple times already. ... [snip!] ... tempted to get my Mom to wrangle her last name and number out of him...find out if there's anything I can do to help her out."</blockquote>



You can't just blame your brother. She was a willing participant and knew the repercussions. I very much doubt some innocent wallflower jumped into bed with your brother and had unprotected sex not knowing what could happen. Don't make him out to be some preying monster, they both fucked up and both have to deal with the fall out. She should have protected herself or not had sex if she wanted to avoid the situation, she didn't however and shares the same amount of blame as your brother.

lacTAYtor. ☮ 3 kids; North Carolina 4496 posts
25th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting 3 little monsters:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Colton's Butterfly:</b>" I'm hoping there's still some shred ... [snip!] ... or not had sex if she wanted to avoid the situation, she didn't however and shares the same amount of blame as your brother."</blockquote>



:!:

Riley+Abby Due October 4; 1 child; Toronto, Ontario 2420 posts
25th Jan '13
Quoting 3 little monsters:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Colton's Butterfly:</b>" I'm hoping there's still some shred ... [snip!] ... or not had sex if she wanted to avoid the situation, she didn't however and shares the same amount of blame as your brother."


*Nods head in humble agreement*



I can also be a little sensitive to this...simply because I was taken advantage of at a younger age than she is, and can sometimes see every girl as a victim.



But you're totally right. I can't even argue with that. It's what can happen when you're having sex with a guy. She would've known that...



It'd still be nice for him to take some responsibility...I'm probably getting ahead of myself, though. This is saying that she opts to keep the kid.

3 little monsters 3 kids; Olathe, Colorado 50990 posts
25th Jan '13
Quoting Colton's Butterfly:" *Nods head in humble agreement* I can also be a little sensitive to this...simply because I was taken ... [snip!] ... him to take some responsibility...I'm probably getting ahead of myself, though. This is saying that she opts to keep the kid."


I totally get that and we all probably have some bonehead relative that makes so many dumbass choices it's hard to believe someone else could be that stupid. It's easier to believe someone was just naive and taken advantage of rather than flat out dumb especially if once you were that naive. You were younger though and it's very unlikely this girl was a victim.
I get the frustration with some stupid man-child though. Someone who is always screwing up even though they should know better by now. I hope he grows up for the sake of the child and mother.

Riley+Abby Due October 4; 1 child; Toronto, Ontario 2420 posts
25th Jan '13
Quoting 3 little monsters:" I totally get that and we all probably have some bonehead relative that makes so many dumbass choices ... [snip!] ... who is always screwing up even though they should know better by now. I hope he grows up for the sake of the child and mother. "


And we probably all get increasingly pissed by that bonehead who makes the choices...:D



There's days I think I can see potential....he just makes a lot of bad decisions that kind of blur that potential.



And I probably give girls way too much credit...It's hard to not see every girl who ends up young and pregnant as innocent...It's kind of the point that I'm stuck at in my life, so I stick other girls there too...My own fault, really.



I guess all I can do is encourage him to be responsible...not that he'd listen to his kid sister. Maybe my older brother can crank some sense into him. :D

gbkj3 Due June 5 (girl); 2 kids; Illinois 36 posts
26th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Colton's Butterfly:</b>" Would child support be a set amount or some sort of a percentage? Or is that a variance from case to ... [snip!] ... he'll step up and take care of that baby, let alone that girl. It would cramp his style, or some bullshit or another. "</blockquote>




I'm not sure. I believe it varies state to state.

Vivialopod 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42775 posts
26th Jan '13

Lol if she finds that magic formula to make a dude grow up and own up to his shit, give me her number.

Mommie Dearest. Due September 17 (boy); 17 kids; Mississippi 1902 posts
26th Jan '13

You should like you own a model of my brother.



He actually thinks he wants a kid though. I've had two of his girlfriends say that he doesn't use protection and doesn't pull out. I don't know why they confess this crap to me , but it freaks me out. The girl he's dating now they got together when she was 4 months pregnant with another guys child. They've been dating on and off for a bit over a year and my brother has 'stepped in' as the boys father since the real one doesn't want nothing to do with them. EXCEPT , my brother doesn't do anything with them, works late hours at a bar and then when he does have free time all he does is go out of town to disc golf tournaments. After she had her baby , she did get pregnant again but miscarried. In a way , I'm glad because she told me yesterday she's breaking up with him because she doesn't see a point in dating someone that's never there. Plus , she's paying all the bills, haha!