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user banned 3 kids; Washington 15083 posts
29th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mrs. Reynolds:</b>" I ask her, yell at her, bribe her, beg her. I am just too tired and sick to keep screaming at them to do things :( It just makes me want to hit them and I know that won't fix anything lol"</blockquote>




Take her stuff away. She's a child. Parent her. None of what you are describing is healthy or productive. She should be helping to sntribute in the house she lives in. And respecting you as an adult.

Bad Things 1 child; Blacksburg, SC, United States 17191 posts
status 29th Jan '13
Quoting Mrs. Reynolds:" I ask her, yell at her, bribe her, beg her. I am just too tired and sick to keep screaming at them to do things :( It just makes me want to hit them and I know that won't fix anything lol"


Take all her shit away.



and if she still refuses, take all the dishes and put them on her bed.

Jane.Doe. Fukushima, Japan 2805 posts
29th Jan '13

I'm not an idiot. She has been without tv/xbox/computer for two weeks. Thanks though.

Jane.Doe. Fukushima, Japan 2805 posts
29th Jan '13
Quoting JessieLeeAnne:" Take all her shit away. and if she still refuses, take all the dishes and put them on her bed. "


LOL if her bedroom wasen't downstairs I totally would. I can barely get down there without holding stuff.. I also have problems with my ankles :-S

ladyballs 2 kids; noneya, TX, United States 7047 posts
29th Jan '13

Shit, I'd threaten her with paying for some type of boot camp that you'll pay for. They aren't too expensive. After taking away all of her stuff, everything aside from a pillow and blanket, lock everything away in the house. Cut everyone off. Get rid of everybody's shit. Have four dishes, four forks, four cups, etc. Tell them until they can learn to help, they get nothing. Leave the house in the barest condition possible.

Bad Things 1 child; Blacksburg, SC, United States 17191 posts
status 29th Jan '13
Quoting Mrs. Reynolds:" I'm not an idiot. She has been without tv/xbox/computer for two weeks. Thanks though."


Hell, that's nothing. lol



I was meaning stripping her of EVERYTHING. Like, in her room being a mattress and sheet, three panties, two bras, two pair of sweatpants, and three sweatshirts, plain deodorant, hair brush, and toothbrush. For her food and drink, she is not allowed to use anything but one plastic spoon, one plastic cup and she may get one plastic bowel a day. If she wants to eat, she will have to wash them. Still make her wash the dishes and have your SO do his part by helping you.



That will put her ass in check REAL quick, worked on me! When she can understand and not take for granted what you provide for her, she can slowly get her privileges back. Remember, your only duty to her is making sure she has shelter, food, clothes, and an education. Everything else is a luxury.

Bad Things 1 child; Blacksburg, SC, United States 17191 posts
status 29th Jan '13
Quoting Stevah:" Shit, I'd threaten her with paying for some type of boot camp that you'll pay for. They aren't too expensive. ... [snip!] ... four cups, etc. Tell them until they can learn to help, they get nothing. Leave the house in the barest condition possible. "


Ha. Beat me to it.



Did you have the same father I did? lol

ღ.ღ.ღ 3 kids; South Carolina 7316 posts
29th Jan '13
Quoting JessieLeeAnne:" Ha. Beat me to it. Did you have the same father I did? lol"


Haha i think we all had the same dad. My told to me i wasn't allowed in the kitchen without my mother there because i wouldn't clean up or help with the dishes, i learned real quick.

greenmamabecky☮ TTC since Jul 2013; 18 kids; Enfield, Connecticut 20987 posts
29th Jan '13

My parents used to take the door off my room when I would slam it. Sometimes for a few days. THAT worked.

thisunrest India 10364 posts
29th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Will☮Creedence:</b>" My parents used to take the door off my room when I would slam it. Sometimes for a few days. THAT worked."</blockquote>




Mine did similar things and it became an ugly battle of wills.. I had issues as a teen, though. Lol.
Now that I'm grown I have nothing but respect for how they stuck to their guns.




OP, your SO reminds me of my ex's roommate. When HE "washed" the dishes I'd find frying pans on the rack with dried scrambled eggs stuck to them! Soooo gross!



Your family should be more willing to help. Does your daughter understand the extent of your injuries, like really get it? Would showing her your doctors' reports or old X-rays drive home that your spine and back can't be strained?



I don't know what else to suggest, but at least your SO seems willing . He can be taught:-).

Jane.Doe. Fukushima, Japan 2805 posts
29th Jan '13

Stevah, you know our daughter better than that lol She gets her stubborness from YOU >.>



Yeh she knows, when I broke both my legs a few years ago she was the one taking care of me most the time because the piece of crap I was dating at the time was useless. But yeh I am thinking I will need to s***p o* a face mask and put all her shit into garbage bags and hide it all lol



And I am stupid to think I could talk to that man :( I said I would prefer he not do the dishes anymore and he got all bitchy when he saw i did the dishes. So I went and got one of his disgusting ass glasses and one I washed and polity handed them to him and said "Okay, this is one you washed, twice, and this is one I washed. This is why I want to do the dishes from now on, that's all" and he got IMMEDIATELY pissed off and angry and defensive as f**k. I don't know if he's always been like this or if it's part of his PTSD or what...but ANYTIME I try to talk to him about something he is doing wrong, or something I want done differently this happens. So I end up just stewing and being miserable, pissed off and angry because I know there's no point trying to talk to him..I'm thinking I'll email his mom while he's bathing the dog and ask her if this shit is something he did as a kid. I know she babied him a lot because he got really sick when he was little and they thought they were going to lose him so I know she spoiled the shit out of him. When we were visiting she almost had a heartattack when he took out the trash unasked and did the dishes when I asked him to lol