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Need opinions ItsEasyIfYouTry 1 child; Florida 830 posts
29th Jan '13

So in May I'm taking a 19 hour road trip with my son who will be 17 months, and my friend and her 2 year old. Insane? Maybe so... I am excited to go on this trip. However, yesterday after hanging with my friend and her toddler I am realizing how different our parenting styles actually are. I am usually all about embracing differences but man this is hard! What advice do you have on staying compatible with your mama friends and your differences?

October2011 2 kids; Pennsylvania 6914 posts
29th Jan '13

Ummm..keep caffeinated and hope to god you aren't PMSing..lol And keep your fingers crossed that the kids behave! goodluck!

Smokey_Taboo Due April 22; 1 child; California 5480 posts
29th Jan '13

well what are your two types of parenting?
Im sure there is a common ground somewhere.

.free. 2 kids; Arkansas 36040 posts
29th Jan '13

"Not my kid, not my problem" attitude.



Seriously.
I have a BFF that makes some of the worst decisions ever (In my mind, compared to how I parent) when it comes to her kid. I let it slide, because it's not worth losing a friend over.



I mean, if the girl is beating her kid, sure, I'd step in.
But like, feeding her kid junk vs. a 'healthy' lunch, nope. Mind my own business.



I mean, what kind of differences are you talking about here?

March 2013 3 kids; Illinois 988 posts
29th Jan '13

Try to keep in mind you have your child and she has hers. Sometimes its hard not to say something. Its all about how each of us has been raised and or trying to change from how we were raised. If your really concerned about something talk very calmly about it, and don't automaticly assume she is wrong, but ask curious questions. I hope you have a good time! You may also try spending more time together that way you get used to how she does stuff, and she gets used to how you do things.

ItsEasyIfYouTry 1 child; Florida 830 posts
29th Jan '13

Yes I should provide more info. We both follow non violent discipline so that's one commonality. I have more of a child led parenting style. I try not to yell to the best of my ability! ;) I am gentle with my son when he's doing something "wrong" and I try to empathize with him. I kinda assumed she did a lot of the same stuff but I noticed she's kinda controlling and lots of times loses her patience pretty quick. I feel judgey right now :-/ but I hate seeing a kid cry and go through so much unnecessary upsetness when it's really no big deal for him to do what he's doing or to expect for him to apologize at 2 yrs old?

ItsEasyIfYouTry 1 child; Florida 830 posts
29th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting October2011:</b>" Ummm..keep caffeinated and hope to god you aren't PMSing..lol And keep your fingers crossed that the kids behave! goodluck!"</blockquote>




Lol.

Smokey_Taboo Due April 22; 1 child; California 5480 posts
29th Jan '13
Quoting ItsEasyIfYouTry:" Yes I should provide more info. We both follow non violent discipline so that's one commonality. I have ... [snip!] ... upsetness when it's really no big deal for him to do what he's doing or to expect for him to apologize at 2 yrs old?"


Well if there is conflict between the two kids you can maybe say "hey have you every tired this"., or if she is the one talking about how a situation is hard with her son you can describe other ways of handling it. She probably wants to be calmer and more grounded but she might need some loving guidance and support from a friend to get there.

ItsEasyIfYouTry 1 child; Florida 830 posts
29th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Smokey_Taboo:</b>" Well if there is conflict between the two kids you can maybe say "hey have you every tired this"., or ... [snip!] ... probably wants to be calmer and more grounded but she might need some loving guidance and support from a friend to get there. "</blockquote>




That is a good point for sure. I am usually a very patient mama I just hope I have enough patience for this trip!