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xxxx Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
1st Feb '13

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LA REINA™ New York, NY, United States 16230 posts
1st Feb '13

The only thing you can do is to try to be supportive. Dealing with depression is horrible but he should be talking to his doctor about what he can do to fix the recent change.

Lilia's Mama (TTC#2) TTC since Aug 2013; 1 child; Florida 3592 posts
1st Feb '13

He might need a stronger dose as anti depressants can lose their effect after awhile. Also he should see a therapist to get to the root of the problem. Depression is really hard to deal with. The best way to help him, help you, is to just be supportive. I remember dealing with it when me and my husband were first married. Anytime he'd get frustrated with me, my depression and OCD symptoms would get worse. Focus on a game plan of how he can manage it. I went through 4 years of therapy for mine and honestly, pills are good but therapy should be the foundation for healing. good luck!

Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
1st Feb '13

I've talked to him about seeing a therapist and he says he'd never feel comfortable with talking to a stranger about his problems.



I'm trying really hard to be supportive but I'm getting tired of getting shrugs/grunts as answers.

Lilia's Mama (TTC#2) TTC since Aug 2013; 1 child; Florida 3592 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting bbbt:" I've talked to him about seeing a therapist and he says he'd never feel comfortable with talking to a ... [snip!] ... about his problems. I'm trying really hard to be supportive but I'm getting tired of getting shrugs/grunts as answers. "

A lot of people feel as he does before they go. Maybe ask him to try? Say "just try and if you dont like it then we can go from there." Also you can always switch therapists till you find one he does like. Best he see a male. My husband actually saw a therapist as well for some anxiety and he at first didnt want to, then he met the therapist and really enjoyed going. Worth a shot. I think if you set it up where your hubby doesnt feel its a permanent thing, maybe he'll try once or twice before he completely shuts down the idea. Tell him you know the depression is wearing him down and you want him to try for you and his family.

Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting Lilia's Mommy:" A lot of people feel as he does before they go. Maybe ask him to try? Say "just try and if you dont like ... [snip!] ... shuts down the idea. Tell him you know the depression is wearing him down and you want him to try for you and his family."


I'll try to convince him. I just want him to be happy. I want him to be able to see how wonderful his life is, and he can't see that when his depression is fogging him.



Thank you. I appreciate it.

Queen Rowdy TTC since Jan 2013; 1 angel baby; Australia 972 posts
1st Feb '13

I don

Lilia's Mama (TTC#2) TTC since Aug 2013; 1 child; Florida 3592 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting bbbt:" I'll try to convince him. I just want him to be happy. I want him to be able to see how wonderful his life is, and he can't see that when his depression is fogging him. Thank you. I appreciate it. "


Its no problem. I know how it is to be depressed and to have a depressed hubby. Neither side is easy. But if the person depressed, keeps fighting it, they will make it through. Dont give up! Make sure he knows he can beat this. I remember days i couldnt even get out of bed. The thought of doing the simplest task made me cry. Now im functioning without medications and i manage it on my own. He can get there.. it'll get better!

Lilia's Mama (TTC#2) TTC since Aug 2013; 1 child; Florida 3592 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting Yellow Diamond:" I don
Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting Yellow Diamond:" I don
Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
1st Feb '13
Quoting Lilia's Mommy:" Its no problem. I know how it is to be depressed and to have a depressed hubby. Neither side is easy. ... [snip!] ... task made me cry. Now im functioning without medications and i manage it on my own. He can get there.. it'll get better!"


I hope so. I miss him! I miss his laughter. He can be such a goof.

Sherri + 3 LLC 3 kids; Mesa, Arizona 3758 posts
1st Feb '13

I was on Paxil for awhile and it was a real b***h. It worked extremely well for a few months but than stopped working completely. I had to go back to my psychiatrist and be weaned off of them. The withdrawal symptoms from Paxil are enough to make you wish you were dead though, so be prepared for that if they change his meds. I am almost positive that he either needs a stronger dose or a stronger SSRI. Either way, I wish him all the luck in the world. I know exactly what he is going through and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.



Also, please do not let the Docs make him stop Paxil cold turkey. Some of them think there is no withdrawal from them. I had such bad dizziness I couldn't even get out of bed. I was puking, seeing things, sensitivity to sound.....omg it was hell for weeks.