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Cast Your Vote:

    • Yes -- Votes: 8
    • No -- Votes: 94
    • It really just depends on how bad it is (explain) -- Votes: 34
What's wrong, flat face? TTC since Jul 2012; 1 child; 3 angel babies; Texas 13675 posts
3rd Feb '13
Quoting justanothamotha:" I wouldn't personally for any reason I can think of. However - I didn't read the article & I do ... [snip!] ... & why they may have made the choice they did. I wouldn't assume they aborted because "he wouldn't be perfect" though."

They didn't abort him. I would have to find the story but don't feel like looking atm. He was fine just couldn't be directly breast fed and had to use special bottles and get like five surgeries for his cleft lip and palate but he is fine. They suggested abortion because of the thing of him having to undergo multiple surgeries and they told them he could have mental disabilities because of the cleft lip and palate...

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
3rd Feb '13
Quoting Raindancer:" They didn't abort him. I would have to find the story but don't feel like looking atm. He was fine just ... [snip!] ... to undergo multiple surgeries and they told them he could have mental disabilities because of the cleft lip and palate..."

Well he could have - it can go right up into clefting of the skull & effect the brain. There is only so much they can tell in prenatal exams & such. I know a boy whose mom was told to abort becuase of heart issues detected very early in pregnancy. They kept saying he would die soon (in utero) - then he wouldn't survive delivery. He is 12 today & doing very well. He will need pace maker repalcements throughout life, but will likely be fine. He has also had anumber of open heart surgeries.



The sad fact is, they can only tell you what is possible. VERY little can be told absolute. So people just have to make the best call they can with what they can gather for info.



Like I said, I'd have the baby...but I also have no idea what anyone else should do. I am in my 30's, am a SAHM, have resources & family support, I have a good education & great resume if I needed to get back in the workforce for more money, etc. It is fairly easy for me to say I'd be able to roll with any issue my child might have. If I were a single mom barely making ends meet with no support system, I might be singing a whole different tune.

The Bear and The Bird 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42574 posts
3rd Feb '13

Depends on a few factors, but probably yes.

yo moyo 1 child; Ishim, Russian Federation 1335 posts
3rd Feb '13

Not for cleft lip but for the other things I might. Hard to say when you're not faced with the situation though.

Fat-and-Happy TTC since Mar 2008; 1 child; Texas 13915 posts
3rd Feb '13

I believe that the only reason I would ever consider it is if I knew that the baby would be in constant pain or suffering.

anonymom + 1.5 2 kids; West Virginia 10774 posts
3rd Feb '13

It would be insanely hard for me to abort no matter what the circumstances were. I really don't know if I would be selfless enough to do it even if my child was going to be in huge amounts of pain. Does that make sense? :?



LO was born with 12 fingers. During early pregnancy with DS (my 2nd) it was implied that polydactyly was an "abortable offense" by someone. I was truly, horrifically offended. It would have to be major for me to seriously consider it.

**mummyX3** 3 kids; Australia 1071 posts
3rd Feb '13

I couldn't abort a child over something like a cleft lip or Down syndrome it would have to be something pretty bad for me to consider it...
A lady in Melbourne had ivf and conceived two boys but she already had three boys so terminated both of them because she wanted a girl I try not to judge ppl for their decisions but aborting a wanted pregnancy because of a cleft lip or gender makes me physically sick! My dh and I differ massively on these sorts of topics he would want to abort over the smallest things!

user banned 3 kids; Los Angeles, California 54034 posts
3rd Feb '13

Probably not for a cleft lip, but for something more severe, I'm sure I would. Especially since I already have 3 kids. I plan to abort any future pregnancies no matter what, though, so, there's that.

Mama♥Breezy 2 kids; Los Angeles, California 34986 posts
3rd Feb '13

I probably wouldn't for a cleft lip, but I would for anything more severe than that. Like an above poster, I would abort any pregnancies I had right now anyway...

~*~Modern*Day*Delilah~*~ 17 kids; Connecticut 15826 posts
4th Feb '13

110% Absolutely NOT. I've known many people with disabilities, missing an arm, leg, even a deformed hand, etc- and they've all gone on to live great fulfilling lives. None of us are perfect- some of us are deformed or different on the outside, and some of us are deformed on the inside in some way. We ALL have our issues. To abort someone simply because of a missing arm or cleft palate, seems drastic to me, when it isn't necessary whatsoever. BUT to each is own, this is just for me personally.

κατι 1 child; Memphis, Tennessee 3143 posts
4th Feb '13

I would never do that,but I wouldn't think twice about aborting for a rape situation.

LayLu 17 kids; Virginia 4007 posts
4th Feb '13
Quoting Let the rain fall:" Would you abort if you were told your child had a birth defect such as cleft lip or missing an arm or ... [snip!] ... one. *This stems from reading a news story of a couple who was told to abort their child because of his cleft lip.*"


About three years ago I was pregnant with my son and at my 20 week ultrasound I found out he had a rather large encephalocele (for those that don't know, it's a birth defect where his skull never finished forming and everything that was supposed to be inside was on the outside), the doctors told me, because of it's size, he wouldn't make it. They pushed me to get an abortion, but at that point I could feel him moving around in there, I already had a connection with my little man, so I decided to give him a chance at life. It was very frustrating because the defect is so rare, I spoke to neurosurgeons who had only heard of a few cases and couldn't really give me any answers. I'd ask if they could operate on him, they'd tell me they wouldn't know until he was born. He wasn't even supposed to make it through the pregnancy, every appointment was like they were expecting to not hear a heartbeat, but sure enough he made it full term and I got to spend six happy hours with my little one. No, he didn't make it, but if I had to go back and do it all over again, I wouldn't change my decision. Those six hours with him were the best I could have asked for.

Ella Minnow Pea Delight, Arkansas 3822 posts
4th Feb '13

I would not abort, regardless of any abnormalities or defects. This LO has a heart defect that will require multiple surgeries, and might also have some other chromosonal disorder(s) as well. It's not up to me to decide how long LO lives, no matter how healthy or unhealthy he is. I will be here loving on him and enjoying each moment I do have, whether it's for a few minutes or the rest of my life.

user banned 2 kids; Iowa 7762 posts
4th Feb '13
Quoting Let the rain fall:" Would you abort if you were told your child had a birth defect such as cleft lip or missing an arm or ... [snip!] ... one. *This stems from reading a news story of a couple who was told to abort their child because of his cleft lip.*"


If it was something that would make their life so horrible that they couldn't even live close to a normal life, yes I would.



But if it was something like just an arm, or wierd looking lip, hell no.

anonymom + 1.5 2 kids; West Virginia 10774 posts
4th Feb '13
Quoting Carmen B. Rotten:" About three years ago I was pregnant with my son and at my 20 week ultrasound I found out he had a rather ... [snip!] ... go back and do it all over again, I wouldn't change my decision. Those six hours with him were the best I could have asked for."


Mama, I am so, so sorry.
That is sort of what I meant... I would want that time. I would want to say hello, tell them about life and how much I loved them, and goodbye. I feel like I wouldn't have that chance with an abortion.



That has to be one of the most heart wrenchign things I've read in a D&D, though. I'm so sorry mama <3