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Can I call the cops? drunk faith1 1 child; Alabama 10081 posts
5th Feb '13

Long story short, I have an ex with a criminal record who has been stalking me for a year. I hadn't heard anything from him in a few months, so I thought I was safe. He just showed up at my mom's house a few minutes ago demanding to see me. She told him I don't live there and to leave. He knows where I DO live but has not contacted me(I changed my phone number). I'm pretty sure he's going to come to my house and he is very violent. Can I call the police on the suspicion that he 'might' show up, or will they not do anything about it unless he actually does come? I do not have a restraining order.

Lilia's Mama (TTC#2) TTC since Aug 2013; 1 child; Florida 3592 posts
5th Feb '13

Call the sheriff's office and make them aware that you're expecting him to show up since he did at your moms. Thats reason to believe he's coming.

loser mom Due June 24 (twins); 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Oslo, Norway, ,,, Europe 11493 posts
status 5th Feb '13

eh, I would call anyway! How scary!

Jennybananna 2 kids; Gilbert, AZ, United States 25079 posts
5th Feb '13

You can call not sure they will do anything. Go get a restraining order though thats scary.

Jane.Doe. Fukushima, Japan 2805 posts
5th Feb '13

Yeh I would def try to get a restraining order asap

user banned TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15320 posts
5th Feb '13

Technically it's not stalking unless they show up twice in one day. However, calling and having an officer come out will start a paper trail, and if and when he does show up, they'll know that this was an ongoing and premeditated event.

Subtle As A Hurricane 2 kids; Texas 4132 posts
5th Feb '13

I don't know if it would do anything, but I would call the non-emergency line and tell them what's going on. Then, if something happens and you have to call 911, hopefully, they can respond better. I'd also look into a restraining order.

homes cool Due August 1; 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 61627 posts
5th Feb '13

I agree with everyone else. I would call, and at least make sure they're aware. I'm sorry. :(

Reagan's Mom ♥ Due July 16 (boy); 1 child; North Dakota 144 posts
5th Feb '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" Technically it's not stalking unless they show up twice in one day. However, calling and having an officer ... [snip!] ... out will start a paper trail, and if and when he does show up, they'll know that this was an ongoing and premeditated event."</blockquote>




If he has the history of doing it before to her... i dont think if she calls the cops they will tell her " ok but technically ur stalker isnt a stalker unless he shows up twice... so until then ur on ur own" ... Dumb.

homes cool Due August 1; 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 61627 posts
5th Feb '13
Quoting Reagan's Mom ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" Technically it's not stalking unless they show ... [snip!] ... will tell her " ok but technically ur stalker isnt a stalker unless he shows up twice... so until then ur on ur own" ... Dumb."


Maybe I read this wrong, but proving someone to be a stalker is incredibly hard from my understanding. It takes a lot of documented evidence for them to really take it seriously.

Captain Obvious 2 kids; Havana, Cuba 25634 posts
5th Feb '13

You can call the police if you are scared.



Don't answer the door if he shows up.

user banned TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15320 posts
5th Feb '13
Quoting Reagan's Mom ♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" Technically it's not stalking unless they show ... [snip!] ... will tell her " ok but technically ur stalker isnt a stalker unless he shows up twice... so until then ur on ur own" ... Dumb."


Unless there's evidence of it happening before, there's nothing they can do. They have to go off of what happens when it happens. Unless she had made a report in the past, there's nothing they can do about him coming to her house once, as long as he leaves when she asks. But as of yet, he hasn't come to her house. But her reporting that he went somewhere looking for her earlier, may suffice as a first time, which is why she should at least make them aware of that.

drunk faith1 1 child; Alabama 10081 posts
5th Feb '13

Thanks, everyone. We usually have a courtesy cop in our apartment complex but he's out tonight for marti gras. We called the manager and she's having another cop sent to patrol the area for a whole so there is someone here in case he shows up.

Kaleighshaleigh 3 kids; USA 6409 posts
5th Feb '13

You don't have to go to the door. Don't let him in, and be prepared to call the cops if he does something like attempt to come in.

drunk faith1 1 child; Alabama 10081 posts
5th Feb '13

I'm not planning on answering the door, to those of you who recommended I don't. We turned the lights off and are staying in the room far from the door.