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The Dandelion Rapist 18 kids; New Mexico 6885 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Supafly★:" I read it and I think I commented on it too with some wacky tidbit about my family lol. My family ... [snip!] ... with me. I knew my grandma was going to be there and I didn't want to cause drama for her - my step-witch did enough of that."


It's mainly my mom who is the crazy one. She has been through some shit in her life though so I try not to jump to conclusions with her judgement she passes on me. I just wish she didn't treat me so differently than she does my other siblings.



From Sexual abuse as a child (By her step father), to child abuse (again by her step father but also allowed by my grandma), and being gang raped at like 16. Not to mention everything my dad had put her though and what not. He actually use to hit her when us kids were young but, that stopped when his drinking stopped.



There is a long fucked up history to my mom, and I have only touched the tip of it.



She is much more tolerable now though since she is back with her first husband and she seems to be happy. I just hope she is a better mother to his 9 year old daughter than she was to us growing up. For my future step sister's sake anyways.

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14181 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting The Dandelion Rapist:" It's mainly my mom who is the crazy one. She has been through some shit in her life though so I try ... [snip!] ... she is a better mother to his 9 year old daughter than she was to us growing up. For my future step sister's sake anyways. "


Aw, that's so sad. I try to go easy on my mom because her childhood was okay but what my dad did to her was fucked up. I know their marriage sucked since day 1 pretty much but she spent 18 years making him happy before he left. No abuse or anything but she was probably mentally drained from trying to please him and never succeeding. I try to cut her some slack because I can understand that she was probably lonely and all. But still - kids come first no matter what.



Now she's much more involved with her stepkids' lives too than she is with my brother and I and that kind of ticks me off.

The Dandelion Rapist 18 kids; New Mexico 6885 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Supafly★:" Aw, that's so sad. I try to go easy on my mom because her childhood was okay but what my dad did to ... [snip!] ... Now she's much more involved with her stepkids' lives too than she is with my brother and I and that kind of ticks me off. "


Relationships like that can easily be mentally draining. Abuse and neglect are abuse and neglect whether it is mental, physical or both.



Perhaps she realized her mistakes with you and realized she doesn't want to make the same ones again? I am hoping that is what my mom is doing anyways. My future step sister has no idea what it is like to have a mother and I hope it is a positive experience for her.



Not to mention she will always have me regardless. I haven't met her yet but, I will sometime this year.

Melissa 1 child; Michigan 1411 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Lady GooGoo
Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14181 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting The Dandelion Rapist:" Relationships like that can easily be mentally draining. Abuse and neglect are abuse and neglect whether ... [snip!] ... experience for her. Not to mention she will always have me regardless. I haven't met her yet but, I will sometime this year. "


I hope that's what it is. My step-siblings have a real mother too so it's like they have 2 mothers and I had 0. But what can you do? I'm 23 years old, don't need one now lol. The only thing I can do is be the best mother I can for my own kids. And thank the lord for my grandmother.

Sherri + 3 LLC 3 kids; Mesa, Arizona 3758 posts
11th Feb '13

I didn't read all 3 pages of this thread so I don't know if this has been addressed, but I would be pissed off at all the staff at the school as well who let you sit like that all day. They could have ran to the store and got you some cheap sweatpants or something.
I am very sorry you had to go through that. I have a lot of traumatizing issue's from my childhood ( mother was a drug addict, dad was too busy dealing with her to care about me). I also think back a lot and get pissed off or sad. It is not healthy to do that at all.
I am now seeing a psychiatrist for the 3rd time to get to the bottom of my issues. I have GAD and Panic Disorder and i know it all stems from my childhood.
OP, I would seriously consider seeking a therapist to talk things through with. They do help wonders.

The Dandelion Rapist 18 kids; New Mexico 6885 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Supafly★:" I hope that's what it is. My step-siblings have a real mother too so it's like they have 2 mothers ... [snip!] ... need one now lol. The only thing I can do is be the best mother I can for my own kids. And thank the lord for my grandmother. "


That's pretty much all you can do is learn from your parents mistakes by becoming a better mother to your children.



The only grandparent I have ever been close to was my great grandmother back East, and she passed away back in 07. I only have one grandparent left, and that is my mom's biological dad.

Melissa 1 child; Michigan 1411 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Sherri + 3:" I didn't read all 3 pages of this thread so I don't know if this has been addressed, but I would be pissed ... [snip!] ... stems from my childhood. OP, I would seriously consider seeking a therapist to talk things through with. They do help wonders."

They could have done something. They should have at least called my mom for me and been like wtf?

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14181 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting The Dandelion Rapist:" That's pretty much all you can do is learn from your parents mistakes by becoming a better mother to ... [snip!] ... grandmother back East, and she passed away back in 07. I only have one grandparent left, and that is my mom's biological dad. "


I was super close to both my mom's parents. But my grandma also passed away in 2007 and my grandpa has Alzheimer's. I haven't seen my dad's father in years but I visit his mom once every couple of months. She just lost her second husband so I try to make time to go see her as much as possible. I was blessed with 2 sweet good-hearted grandmothers. :)

The Dandelion Rapist 18 kids; New Mexico 6885 posts
11th Feb '13
Quoting Supafly★:" I was super close to both my mom's parents. But my grandma also passed away in 2007 and my grandpa ... [snip!] ... husband so I try to make time to go see her as much as possible. I was blessed with 2 sweet good-hearted grandmothers. :)"


My Grandpa (On my dad's side) passed away when my dad was like 8 or 9... So I never met him. Though, my grandma did remarry and I got to know that Grandpa. My Grandma (On my dad's side) passed away a while ago. My Grandpa Passed away last year due to Bone Cancer.



On my mom's side, my Grandma passed away the day after Aaron and I got married. (September 2010). And my grandpa on my mom's side is still around. Then there was my great grandma (Whom I mentioned earlier) who passed away in 2007. She was the sweetest lady ever but goodness you did NOT want to get on that woman's bad side.

lolajessup 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Beaverton, Michigan 44076 posts
12th Feb '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mel152009:</b>" My mom wasn't very maternal either. No hugs, kisses, cuddles. We just recently started saying "love you" ... [snip!] ... up, he took me shopping, helped pick out my prom dress, discussed boys with me... etc. I'm glad I'm closer with her now though."</blockquote>



My mom and I have a similar relationship. I don't ever remember a time being
Told ily, hugging or kissing me, etc. she finally hugged me and said ily right before I was hospitalized. That's about it. Basically when she's scared for my safety idk. I have a lot of issues with that. I constantly need SOs affection and constantly need him to reassure me he loves me. I feel so psycho.