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TrixieGirl Due July 4; 1 child; Maryland 1175 posts
12th Feb '13
Quoting Leigha Jai:" I need advice, i have no clue what i should do, and maybe i should just ask other momma what they think. ... [snip!] ... get custody and he has a lawer already cuz he alreaddy has a son, and i just really dont knwo what to do. any advice can help."


Remember when you just dont file for C.S., you are not ensuring that he does not have a part in your childs life. In order to do that you need to have him sign away his parental rights. Also, keep in mind when your child is much older, one day you will have to explain to them why you did not pursue a relationship for your child with their father. The explination might be justified to you, but what will your child say? How will that make you feel if they are upset with you becuase they felt they missed out on something? If you went to court for CS you could go for full custody and visits would have to be coordianted and you both could agree to the right terms at that time. IF you got the money for your child and do not really need it, you could start a great savings account for their future for college or whatever...

DeanJade&Mak's Mom 3 kids; Covina, CA, United States 8822 posts
12th Feb '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Leigha Jai:</b>" after everythign that has happen i do not agree with this at all. "</blockquote>




So u think a judge is going to tell this guy to pay u money, and because he's a dick, he dosnt get to see his kid...




Goodluck with that lol... I never even asked for child support and my sons 7... his dad is the biggest a*****e I've ever met... he's abused me, forced sex on me, and wrecked my car trying to kill me...
I have to see him every 1st, 2nd, and 4th Friday of each month... he is my sons father, I chose to have his baby, I have to suffer and see his goofy ass face for the rest of my life... I don't deserve to get paid for taking care of my kid...
But my ex and Dean deserve to have a relationship...

DeanJade&Mak's Mom 3 kids; Covina, CA, United States 8822 posts
12th Feb '13

Double post........

Leigha Jai 1 child; Kalamazoo, Michigan 41 posts
12th Feb '13
Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" We were giving advice... and I think you should try, so you can tell your son that you tried instead of pushing him out completely because of how he is with his other son. "

sorry i dont like being called selfish and i have tryed this whole pregnancy, even when he dont answer my calls or text i try and tell him ( well at first i did till about 24 weeks) about the baby i would ask if he wanted to know. then i got told hes not gonna make the trip to see the birth and thats when i stoped telling him things, so i think i have tryed my best.

Yurvette [♥] 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Hyrule Castle, LZ, San Marino 36449 posts
12th Feb '13
Quoting Leigha Jai:" sorry i dont like being called selfish and i have tryed this whole pregnancy, even when he dont answer ... [snip!] ... told hes not gonna make the trip to see the birth and thats when i stoped telling him things, so i think i have tryed my best."


Men act differently than us during pregnancy. The baby isnt here yet so he doesnt owe it to you to talk to you. You are being selfish. I know how you are feeling. My ex tried to contact me while I was pregnant with my youngest, and every time I told him to f**k off... The one time that he saw me pregnant was when we were meeting our sons fathers, and he wanted to carry stuff for me and open doors and everything, and I was pissed. I KNOW how you feel. I didnt want him to be near the baby until he signed his rights over. But he washolding the baby while we were signing our rights away.



Give him a chance to be a father. If he doesnt, then its on him. But dont start out on not wanting him around because he wasnt around during the pregnancy.