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Breastfeeing causes preference of parent? Thunderchunk 2 kids; Mobile, Alabama 11066 posts
14th Feb '13

My little girl is 2 months old and since she was born it seems like she has had a preference for me. When my husband tries to hold her or gives her a bottle I've pumped, she's always super fussy. Like last night while I was trying to make dinner I gave him a bottle to feed her and she wouldn't take it and just screamed. I thought maybe she just wasn't very hungry but as soon as I picked her up, she stopped crying and took the bottle from me. My husband swears it's because I'm breast feeding and she has some special connection with me and looks at my husband as a stranger. Is this true? Do breastfed babies prefer the mother? It breaks my heart because I feel like he doesn't have that special connection like I have with her.

Blythe. 1 child; Indiana 22401 posts
14th Feb '13

I think the prefer the one they are around the most. DD always prefers SO for anything. They are together 24//7

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
14th Feb '13

I don't think so. My son just likes to be held and doesn't care who is holding him. But if he's hungry he wants me, but I don't really pump and offer bottles, eve though SO suggests it so we can take turns at night.

Redneck Mamma North Carolina 8746 posts
14th Feb '13

It wasn't for me... He preferred his dad a lot of the times when I was breastfeeding, he still does. Likes to kick back on the couch and cuddle up with his daddy to take naps.

Shelby Chappell Due November 29 (girl); 1 child; Alberta 1575 posts
14th Feb '13

DS goes through periods where he prefers his daddy over me. Nothing I do can calm him down but as soon as he goes to his daddy he is fine. And then he will go through periods where I am the only one who can calm him down.

Clk 2 kids; Dexter, Michigan 11974 posts
14th Feb '13
Quoting Kayla [:)]♥:" Both my kids wanted me for my boobs, and then daddy the rest of the time haha"


That is how mine are, I'm just the food, Daddy is really where it's at.

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
14th Feb '13

I bfed and my daughter goes back and forth. Usually if she's sleepy or wants to snuggle, she wants me but if she wants to play , she goes to DH. He can make her laugh like I never could.

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14140 posts
14th Feb '13

DS wants me all the time no matter who he's with. But then again I'm the food, the cuddler, the rocker and the singer all in one. Plus I'm around him 24/7. When he wants to play he goes to his big brother.

Moses. Due October 27; 3 kids; Texas 16003 posts
14th Feb '13

I have no personal experience with breastfeeding, but I will say the preference comes from how they are treated and cared for. If the mother is breastfeeding, changing every diaper, comforting every cry then yes, I could see how dad wouldn't be super important to them. DH is rarely home, but when he is he does every diaper change, bottle feeding and night waking. And even though that happened so little, my babies still preferred him just as much as me. I have a good friend whose baby cannot stand him. I don't think he's a shit parent, but he does have the mindset men aren't "supposed" to do anything but play with babies.

Clk 2 kids; Dexter, Michigan 11974 posts
14th Feb '13
Quoting Kayla [:)]♥:" It's because he's cool and mysterious. :lol: "He doesn't have boobs, I need to get to know this strange figure." hehe"

Oh yeah they both love his beard, it's just so different from my hairless face. As newborns both of them did try to latch onto his nipples lol. If I didn't produce the milk not sure stick with me at all. :P

NicoThunders 2 kids; Michigan 12847 posts
14th Feb '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Blythe.:</b>" I think the prefer the one they are around the most. DD always prefers SO for anything. They are together 24//7"</blockquote>




!!! This!



Right after dd#1 was born dh lost his job so I was back at my old job within a month. He was the stay at home dad for a long while, so whrnever I was home she preferred him to me (and 6 years later she still does, heh).
DD#2 spent/spends far more time with me, and prefers me.

BC Mama 2 kids; British Columbia 512 posts
14th Feb '13
Quoting Supafly★:" DS wants me all the time no matter who he's with. But then again I'm the food, the cuddler, the rocker ... [snip!] ... the cuddler, the rocker and the singer all in one. Plus I'm around him 24/7. When he wants to play he goes to his big brother. "


This exactly!

Clk 2 kids; Dexter, Michigan 11974 posts
14th Feb '13
Quoting Kayla [:)]♥:" Oh my gosh, that reminds me of when my husband had a beard. He started growing it when our daughter ... [snip!] ... he was able to grow it out. It was LONG. He shaved it just before work, and it scared the shit out of our daughter bahahahahaha"

Lol kids are funny like that. My mom always tells a story about my brother being scared of her. She had left hair curlers on one night, he woke up, so she went to get him. Only he started screaming louder when he saw her, calling for "mama." My Dad had to get him, while my Mom took the curlers out. It was the only way he would go to our Mom.

Mrs.O! 18 kids; your moms ass, HI, United States 21888 posts
14th Feb '13

babies like the person they spend the most time with...I mean, if you see someones face 12 hours a day straight and then someone else comes out of nowhere and starts trying to do the things you did with the other person and you had no clue how to connect that "this is mom, her job is to take care of me, but that's dad his job is to go out and make money and then come home and take care of me"...



DH had no real bond with LO when he was a little baby...LO would want his momma ALL THE TIME, now that he's 3 and can understand and interact, he loves his dad..he loves going out with his daddy and playing...

ℕightingale 1 child; Mississippi 8187 posts
14th Feb '13

DD wasn't like that she only wanted me when she was hungry and her daddy the rest of the time until 13 months. Now she's 17 months and she's always wanting me she wants nothing to do with DH.