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Herpes EBF*JB 2 kids; California 2889 posts
16th Feb '13

This stems from another conversation. We were talking about people without herpes dating those who did. Someone was saying that as long as you use a condom, you are good to go. Someone else was saying that the herpes virus could go through condom pores, someone else was saying they didn't have to have an outbreak to get it, and another person was saying if you give someone with herpes oral, than you can get it on your mouth... etc.
SO, I was wondering if anyone really knew the facts about this?
Some of it I couldn't believe, but it got me to wondering if it was possible.



I know lots of people without herpes have dated people with it, etc.

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
16th Feb '13

Condoms don't 100% protect you from anything. I don't believe you have to have an outbreak to get it, some people never even break out so they'll never even know they have it. You can get herpes from giving oral to someone who has herpes.



So basically, yes all of that is true.

A is Me 1 child; South Carolina 3782 posts
16th Feb '13

With any of those situations there is a chance, however slight, that you can pass it to your partner. I guess people just have to weigh the risk against how horny they are?

EBF*JB 2 kids; California 2889 posts
16th Feb '13
Quoting Ryloonjimama:" Condoms don't 100% protect you from anything. I don't believe you have to have an outbreak to get it, ... [snip!] ... even know they have it. You can get herpes from giving oral to someone who has herpes. So basically, yes all of that is true."


Hmm, yes all that makes sense.

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
16th Feb '13

I found out I had herpes like a year ago because I had a severe outbreak.



I'd been with SO for 6 years at that point. I don't think that he cheated on me. I definitely never cheated on him.



When I was 13, I was in a relationship with a guy for 2 years. When I was 17 we were getting back together and I slept with him unprotected. A week later I had what I thought was thrush. I went to the doctor who never even looked at me and just assumed it was thrush also. I ended up telling him I couldn't get back together with him because he really hurt me when we broke up & I didn't feel like I could trust him. A few months later I started dating my now SO.



For like 5 years I got thrush a lot when I would get sick with tonsillitis (my tonsils are f*cked)... Or what I assumed was thrush, now I'm thinking it was herpes all along, without the sores. My doctor said that it was absolutely possible.

EBF*JB 2 kids; California 2889 posts
16th Feb '13
Quoting Ryloonjimama:" I found out I had herpes like a year ago because I had a severe outbreak. I'd been with SO for 6 years ... [snip!] ... was thrush, now I'm thinking it was herpes all along, without the sores. My doctor said that it was absolutely possible."


Oh wow, so do you think you got it from your ex?

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
16th Feb '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting EBF*JB:</b>" Oh wow, so do you think you got it from your ex?"</blockquote>




Yeah, I strongly believe I did. May sounds naive but I just don't think my SO is he guy to cheat. Besides the life we live, he goes to work, comes home, we spend the bulk of our free time as a family & then if we go out, it's together. Unless he fucked someone at work which is very doubtful considering his place of employment at that time was a warehouse with 100% men. lol.



It's not ideal, obviously... But it's no death sentence. I've never had sores break out again after that first time. I haven't even had any symptoms (like what I normally would have thought was thrush) since that time & if it ever happens I have a script on hand to treat it straight away. My SO has never had an outbreak & chances are he'd have to have it, too... Unfortunately they can't tell if you have it unless they can swab the sores for testing. We've both had complete STI checks & everything else was clear. It was just a very bizarre situation.



I've always wanted to ask my ex, but I haven't spoken to him since I was 17. lol. That would be a bit weird.

Burs92447 TTC since Mar 2009; California 157 posts
11th Apr '13
Quoting EBF*JB:" This stems from another conversation. We were talking about people without herpes dating those who did. ... [snip!] ... believe, but it got me to wondering if it was possible. I know lots of people without herpes have dated people with it, etc."


Herpes can be transmitted outside of bodily fluids. So it is possible to have a contagious sore outside the condom area that could be transmitted from either partner to the other.



http://herpes-coldsores.com/herpes_faq.htm