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Cast Your Vote:

    • Yes, I would want to know -- Votes: 63
    • No, I would prefer not to know -- Votes: 31
Would you want to know? *Poll* (Cheating) user banned
26th Feb '13

Your husband goes out, gets drunk, and has protected sex with another woman.
He feels HORRIBLE.
He has never been so ashamed, depressed, guilty in his entire life. He has never regretted anything more.
This was REALLY a one time thing, it will never happen again and you husband will literally feel awful everyday for the rest of his life.

I am Jesus and I can 100% gaurentee you that it will never happen again.


Do you want to know that he cheated?

LA REINA™ New York, NY, United States 16675 posts
26th Feb '13

This is unrealistic but no, in that situation, I would not want to know.

iLL-Legal Unicorn Alien 3 kids; New York, TX, United States 37137 posts
26th Feb '13

Yes, for both our sakes honestly. If he felt that guilty about it and it affected him so much, it would do him good too. If he keeps it a secret but feels that way, it will eventually start affecting the marriage too.

user banned Due November 7 (boy); 1 child; Dayton, Ohio 26853 posts
26th Feb '13
Quoting Cersei
......... nowhere, NW, United States 25972 posts
26th Feb '13

No. Especially if all other aspects of our relationship are fine.

user banned 2 kids; Silly, Belgium 6539 posts
26th Feb '13

I wouldn't want to know. I could never overcome it and if it's 100% certain it would never happen again, what would I gain from having the knowledge of it aside from a grudge and heartache?



I would only want to know if there was a chance it would happen again, so I could do everything in my power to either get out of the relationship or step up my game if I am not giving him what he needs so he feels he has to get it somewhere else.

Mama Rice 34 kids; North Las Vegas, Nevada 11980 posts
26th Feb '13

Yes and as horrible as it sounds I don't think I could stay with him. I would be hurt and betrayed and lose all trust for him. I can't stay in a relationship with no trust.

LA REINA™ New York, NY, United States 16675 posts
26th Feb '13
Quoting Smartass *TTC*:" It's not unrealistic, besides the Jesus part. This happened to one of my male friends."

You're never 100% certain what another person would do or wouldn't do, that's why I said it's unrealistic.

user banned Due November 7 (boy); 1 child; Dayton, Ohio 26853 posts
26th Feb '13

This happened to my friend.
He talked to me about it and bawled and felt awful and I can 100% assure you he would never do it again.



He told me he was going to tell his wife and I advised him against it.
This was a year ago.



He couldn't not tell her, so he did. And she has literally treated him like shit ever since. She uses it against him, they have been to counseling.



I truely believe they would have had a successful marriage if he would have not told her.

LA REINA™ New York, NY, United States 16675 posts
26th Feb '13
Quoting Pusherman:" I wouldn't want to know. I could never overcome it and if it's 100% certain it would never happen again, ... [snip!] ... out of the relationship or step up my game if I am not giving him what he needs so he feels he has to get it somewhere else."

My sentiments exactly.

Crystal 3 kids; Hephzibah, Georgia 15566 posts
26th Feb '13

Yes, I would absolutely want to know. It's one of the things we talked about and it's a deal breaker for both of us. If he was unfaithful to me, I'd want to know. I say it's a deal breaker, but in the situation you described, idk, really if I would end it. I think it would take a long time to gain the trust back, though.

Em ♥ 3 kids; Indiana 943 posts
26th Feb '13

I would want to know. It would be eating at him, and we have an open and honest relationship. We tell each other everything. Everyone makes mistakes and especially if it were "guaranteed" to never happen again I would definitely want him to be able to express it to me so that he didn't have to feel so guilty.

MamaCass{+JOE} 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Pennsylvania 42360 posts
26th Feb '13

Thinking on how my own relationship with my husband is, no, I would not want to know. If it were truly a regrettable mistake on his part, then I would say what I don't know can't hurt me.



However if it were a recurring thing, or he was having an affair, I would absolutely want to know.

LA REINA™ New York, NY, United States 16675 posts
26th Feb '13
Quoting Smartass *TTC*:" This happened to my friend. He talked to me about it and bawled and felt awful and I can 100% assure ... [snip!] ... it, they have been to counseling. I truely believe they would have had a successful marriage if he would have not told her."


He was wrong when he cheated on her but if she cannot forgive him even after counseling then maybe it is time for them to move on. Broken trust is the worst thing in a marriage.

user banned 3 kids; Los Angeles, California 54034 posts
26th Feb '13

Yep, because I would start packing his bags. He should have thought about feeling guilty before he decided to drunk-f**k somebody.