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Is it weird? user banned
9th Mar '13

Is it weird I still consider my toddler as an infant?

She is only 13 months old and does not talk (barely babbles) does not walk and can barely cruise. And has most on here know she is very small at 16lbs and 26.5inches long (size of a 6 month old) basically.

When I look at her all I see is a baby a little infant and not a toddler. It keeps making me depressed :( I feel like I am being robbed of her being and acting like a toddler, not cause she cant walk or talk but because she is so small. I am constantly having to correct ppl when out that she is not only around 6 months old and why she maybe so small and so on. Ppl will say oh she is so smart for being so young and when I say that she is 13 months old, and I have to explain to them that she is small and so on, then they want to see a tiny baby walk but she cant, so they kinda act different like they no longer think she is smart.

IDK, I guess I have myself all worked up over it, but I cant help but feel sad that we are going to have to go through life explaining to everyone that she is just small. IDK even know if it makes sense.

All I know is I feel horrible that it makes me sad, is that weird or wrong of me to feel this way?

MamaCass{+JOE} 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Pennsylvania 42355 posts
9th Mar '13

No, not weird at all. I still see my 2.5 year old as a baby, lol. And my 5 year old as a toddler (though she is far from a toddler).

user banned 1 child; :), :), United States 5380 posts
9th Mar '13

No, it's not weird or wrong. You also shouldn't feel like you need to explain it to everyone that asks.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
9th Mar '13

People are dumb and they're going to judge you no matter what you do/have/are/etc. Not everyone's child walks by 13 months. My son didn't walk until he was 19 months old. My cousin walked at 17 months with physical therapy.



Your child has a developmental disorder. Your Canadian "doctors" can claim she's normal all they want, but it's painfully obvious that she's not developing as quickly as she should be. It's not a bad thing, but you're going to yield a lot of questions. But what parent of a special needs baby doesn't? She's your baby. She's absolutely perfect for you. And that's all that matters. Answer only the questions you feel like answering and ignore anyone else.



And enjoy your baby! She won't be a baby forever.

Crazyhazel89 1 child; Erie, Pennsylvania 3994 posts
9th Mar '13

my 11 month old is only like 16 lbs too...though she does walk and babble. She says hi sometimes and mama dada...but not a lot of anything else...people always say she is tiny...but i just don't let it bother me.

White Chocolate Milk 1 child; Chelsea, Alabama 12303 posts
9th Mar '13

Some kids are just small. I don't think you should be offering a justification to people because of that. I don't know if she has a medical condition causing her to be small but again you don't need to justify it to people. I mean you wouldn't ask someone why they have cancer, so why does it matter if she is small. And as far as her capabilities go, who gives a shit? She can't walk? Ok I know a lot of babies who can't or didnt walk at that age. She can't talk? Well my son is a month older than her and he can't say anything yet either. Don't feel like you have to make people understand her just because she isn't some Hollywood baby that can do everything by 8 months old. Real life kids just aren't like that, and that is nothing to be worried about. These people can think what they want, but you don't have to try and make them understand that everything is ok with her, she's just different. Everyone is different.

Leslie Graham-Newton Due April 16 (girl); 2 kids; Rolla, Missouri 193 posts
9th Mar '13

My daughter is in the same boat almost 2 just hit 20ib mark people think she is 9 months old they thimk she is super smart and ask she didnt walk until 14-15 months she doubled her birth weight at 1 and only weighed 7ibs at birth. I even took her to the childrens hospital to see if there was anything wrong with her and they said she is perfect. Ive had people even threaten to call cps in me for having such a sickly looking baby. She is happy extremely smart and talented she does things a 4-5 year old are doing like colors and shapes and numbers and names and animals.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" People are dumb and they're going to judge you no matter what you do/have/are/etc. Not everyone's child ... [snip!] ... Answer only the questions you feel like answering and ignore anyone else. And enjoy your baby! She won't be a baby forever."


Thanks.
I guess your right, to only answer what I want to and so on.

Its so frustrating, you know. It does not matter to me that she is behind in walking and talking and even growing, cause all other areas she is advanced in, like comprehension (sp?) and I guess tasks like "where do your socks go?" she tries to put them on, and she knows her animals by pictures and can pick them out of books etc...
It just kinda gets me down when everyone is like why is she small? whats wrong with her, when will you know whats wrong with her tc.....

UGH.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting crazy coupon lady:" Thanks. I guess your right, to only answer what I want to and so on. Its so frustrating, you ... [snip!] ... me down when everyone is like why is she small? whats wrong with her, when will you know whats wrong with her tc..... UGH."


The questions suck. They really do. I've fielded questions about my son ever since he took so long to start walking. He's very tall and thin and not as strong as other kids his age. He's developmentally delayed and mentally delayed in some areas and VERY mentally advanced in others. Luckily, he seems to be growing out of his delays with some extra help. But there are always going to be rude people full of questions.



Answer what you want and tell the rest it's none of their business. Or ask them a stupid question about themselves like, "Well why are you black?" Or "Why are you blonde?" Or whatever.



There may never be a CLEAR reason why she's behind. There isn't one for my son. And even if there were, it's really none of anyone's business unless you choose to make it their business.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" The questions suck. They really do. I've fielded questions about my son ever since he took so long to ... [snip!] ... one for my son. And even if there were, it's really none of anyone's business unless you choose to make it their business."



I think you made me realize that I am in denile (sp?) srry long day today, that there is something wrong with her and I have been refusing to want to see it or admit that I do see it and just been brushing it off.

But where do I go from here? Genetic testing is not for another yr, they dont do it under 2 here (unless something major is present before then) They already cleared her as being normal, but set up speech therapy and physical therapy for her weak legs starting next month.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting crazy coupon lady:" I think you made me realize that I am in denile (sp?) srry long day today, that there is something ... [snip!] ... They already cleared her as being normal, but set up speech therapy and physical therapy for her weak legs starting next month."


Well there's not much you CAN do if they don't provide certain medical procedures until a certain age. They do that with Medicaid here. You have to wait until a certain age or prove necessity, etc.



It sounds like they're at least trying to get the ball rolling with physical therapy and speech. It will either help or you'll get a referral for genetic testing out of it at least.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" Well there's not much you CAN do if they don't provide certain medical procedures until a certain age. ... [snip!] ... rolling with physical therapy and speech. It will either help or you'll get a referral for genetic testing out of it at least."


Yeah they set up the therapy last month at her 1yr checkup well they put the referral in, but he wanted to see her in 2 months before she started jst in case she started walking and talking in that time frame.

We have met with genetics 3 times already, once when I was pregnant, after she was born and last October, in which she was cleared each time for "early testing" since she has no physical features to a child with dwarfism or other growth disorders etc....they did sight testing, so mesuring her feet and toes fingers how far apart her eyes are and ears, etc.....

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
9th Mar '13
Quoting crazy coupon lady:" Yeah they set up the therapy last month at her 1yr checkup well they put the referral in, but he wanted ... [snip!] ... disorders etc....they did sight testing, so mesuring her feet and toes fingers how far apart her eyes are and ears, etc....."


Some kids are just small. DD's 29.5 inches tall. And she just turned 1 last Saturday. But she weighs 25lbs. I wouldn't think her height/weight would be much of a concern, but maybe coupling it with her physical/verbal delays, it might end up being something. Or it could be completely unrelated and her physical/verbal delays are just a coincidence and they should be your only real concern.