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O's mamma 1 child; Springfield, Illinois 2455 posts
11th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♥K:</b>" Maybe HE has an explanation. That it was a unintentional reaction and now he's aware of it, he can control it?"</blockquote>




Possibly. I called him. I'll try talking but my point is pretty straightforward.

Snickles 4 kids; California 3067 posts
11th Mar '13
Quoting Olivia Novalee's Mommy:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Snickles:</b>" So leaving him without talking about it and ... [snip!] ... would just leave without as much as a conversation. "</blockquote> When it comes to the well being of my daughter, yes"


She is his daughter as well, do you really think he was intentionally trying to be mean to her, with no reason? I am not saying you're wrong for your feelings, I am saying you two need to sit down and talk and come to a mutual understanding of what is and isn't ok when it comes to discipline. To just jump up and leave your marriage over what seems to be so little to me, is not very mature. I could see it if it was repeatedly or if it was a constant thing, but over one little smack, is jumping to the extreme.

O's mamma 1 child; Springfield, Illinois 2455 posts
11th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Snickles:</b>" She is his daughter as well, do you really think he was intentionally trying to be mean to her, with ... [snip!] ... I could see it if it was repeatedly or if it was a constant thing, but over one little smack, is jumping to the extreme. "</blockquote>




I suppose. But it won't happen again this way. It won't be a constant thing. I'm willing to hear him out. And I probably overreacted quite a bit. I still won't have him hitting her tho

::Nikki:: 1 child; Arkansas 2624 posts
11th Mar '13
Quoting Olivia Novalee's Mommy:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Snickles:</b>" She is his daughter as well, do you really think ... [snip!] ... a constant thing. I'm willing to hear him out. And I probably overreacted quite a bit. I still won't have him hitting her tho"


You made an emotional decision without really thinking it through. If you take marriage this lightly, maybe you SHOULDN'T be married. You have been married for a month and have already given back your ring and left? It seems like if you had a child together before you even got married that you would have some kind of idea of his parenting style by now--why marry him at all if you dont agree with the way he disciplines? As an adult, especially as a parent, you are going to need to learn how to communicate and have a real conversation. I hate to break it to you, but she is just as much his child as she is yours. It isnt just YOUR decision on how she is raised. I would suggest figuring out a discipline style that works for both of you, because if you end up leaving him over this he could still file for joint custody--then you would have no marriage AND your daughter would be away from you half of the time.

Snickles 4 kids; California 3067 posts
11th Mar '13
Quoting O's mamma:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Snickles:</b>" She is his daughter as well, do you really think ... [snip!] ... a constant thing. I'm willing to hear him out. And I probably overreacted quite a bit. I still won't have him hitting her tho"


I really think you did overreact and that happens sometimes, its ok that you don't want him hitting her, but without having the conversation with him about it, there is no agreement to how you both, as parents, together want to correct her. Just take a breath, collect your thoughts and sit down and talk.



Also, please don't lose your job over this, you are the only income for your daughter, you all rely on your job, go talk to him before you lose your job and don't have a way to support her.

Snickles 4 kids; California 3067 posts
11th Mar '13
Quoting ::Nikki:::" You made an emotional decision without really thinking it through. If you take marriage this lightly, ... [snip!] ... could still file for joint custody--then you would have no marriage AND your daughter would be away from you half of the time."


This bold part is very true. If he was to do that you would really have no say in how he corrects her, and you wouldn't be there with her to even know what was going on.