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Single father help considering adoption :( Laidbackblkguy 18 kids; Myrtle Beach, South Carolina 27 posts
15th Mar '13

Hey all I'm a single father of one child and thinking about adoption. Here's my situation I've raised him since he was almost 1, he is now 3. I had no help from the mother and got full custody when he was 1 1/2 she just signed him on over and went back to her stripper job :( she's seen him maybe twice since then and none in a year now. I've held jobs here and there and I had to drop out of college for lack of finding a babysitter within my budget. He's well taken cared for and I get help from my mother who I moved back in with after leaving college. My main reasons for adoption is that I'm physically tired all the time all he cares about is my mom and what she does for him but not what I do. I'm depressed all the time I have no friends, lost my job, and being around him everyday is mentally frustrating. How do I go about adoption without my mother getting involved because she plans to fight for custody if I go through with it. I just hate being independent I've always been raised to be a family man and when the mother left the picture my mind just fell apart and I hate being a single independent father...

ashleeoh Due August 10 (girl); 1 child; Tucson, Arizona 2598 posts
15th Mar '13

Why don't you just give your mom custody then?

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
15th Mar '13

Just a question here... why not let your mother adopt him until you get your life under control? Finish college and get a good job and a place to live and then take full custody back...? If she has love and a stable living situation I see no reason why she couldn't adopt. Then you'd get to see your child regularly.

vagina. 3 kids; Titz, No, Germany 30923 posts
15th Mar '13

Why not just sign custody over to your mom? Things can.change.down the road & you could get him back if you wanted?

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10434 posts
15th Mar '13

First off, why wouldn't you want your mother to have custody?



Secondly, what did you think having a child would consist of?

Sarah ♥ K&K 2 kids; 2 angel babies; South Land, CA, United States 117114 posts
15th Mar '13

Why cant your mom have custody?

Jennybananna 2 kids; Gilbert, AZ, United States 25079 posts
15th Mar '13
Quoting Lilly'smommy5:" Just a question here... why not let your mother adopt him until you get your life under control? Finish ... [snip!] ... she has love and a stable living situation I see no reason why she couldn't adopt. Then you'd get to see your child regularly."

This

user banned Due November 26; 1 child; Parkersburg, West Virginia 9548 posts
15th Mar '13

he needs you he already lost his mom. maybe you can talk it out with your mom and have her help more and you can go back to school. more money and your own place will help you alot

☠Jenniefahhh 1 child; Djibouti 70787 posts
15th Mar '13

You think you can just give up a kid because you're tired?



If she wants to fight for custody, let her have the kid back. You're selfish as hell.

vagina. 3 kids; Titz, No, Germany 30923 posts
15th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lilly'smommy5:</b>" Just a question here... why not let your mother adopt him until you get your life under control? Finish ... [snip!] ... she has love and a stable living situation I see no reason why she couldn't adopt. Then you'd get to see your child regularly."</blockquote>




:!:

Brookie99 1 child; Fort McMurray, Alberta 1126 posts
15th Mar '13

It will be EXTREMELY metaly and emotionally damaging for a child to be put up for adoption at 3 and I guarantee it will cause him to have tons of emotional and mental issues because of the abandonment including major attachment disorders. If your mom wants custody sign it over to her otherwise you will be damaging your son for the rest of his life.

Lilly and Laya's momma 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Chesapeake, Virginia 7824 posts
15th Mar '13

If I was in the position I would want my little one to be with some in the family. I couldn't imagine giving my child up to a stranger if he was a few years old.

Simply, Mom 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Upland, 11704 posts
15th Mar '13

hope it all works out. i suggest ur mom

JKBC♡ 2 kids; Windsor, PA, United States 9198 posts
15th Mar '13

Give your mother custody, he's 3 not a newborn, being thrown into another family may be a very traumatic experience for him. If your mother wants that responsibility, let her have it. Plus when you get your life together, you take him back with you, he needs you, you are his father. His mother abandoned him, he needs parent in his life.

Capt Plzen, Pl, Czech Republic 9110 posts
15th Mar '13
Quoting Laidbackblkguy:" Hey all I'm a single father of one child and thinking about adoption. Here's my situation I've raised ... [snip!] ... to be a family man and when the mother left the picture my mind just fell apart and I hate being a single independent father..."


You sound super depressed, get help for that and everythig will change.



you obviously love your son, but feel like you are at the end of your rope.. just get help for yourself, for your baby.