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SAHM THE Draco Malfoy 2 kids; Tennessee 20015 posts
17th Mar '13

How much do you expect SO/DH to help when they are home? what are the hour limits? like if he has more hours working, does he help less? i'm getting mixed reviews on this topic.

Cry Baby 1 child; ........, .., United States 15356 posts
17th Mar '13

Mine volunteers to help with whatever isn't done. Then once were done we hang out and play cod. I haven't had to ask him or give him a list of what he needs to do.

Zzz Due July 20 (boy); 1 child; fuuuuuuuu, OH, United States 2072 posts
17th Mar '13

I don't think there should be any such thing as that.. Sometimes being a SAHM is just as hard work its a job all day someone has to do it... You're supposed to help each other out. To each their own but thats how we do it.

Layla's Momma ♥ 17 kids; California 4457 posts
17th Mar '13

I don't expect him to help with much cause he works almost every day. All I expect out of him is to help with our daughter.

saageex3 1 child; New York 5777 posts
17th Mar '13

SO works 5 days a week, now adding on 6. He works 11 hour shifts so i don't expect him to do anything on those days. ( Not like he could) Before he goes to work though i do expect him to get up and spend time with his daughter since he hardly gets to see her and on his day off he does the diaper changes, feeding etc because he likes to say "he doesn't know how" and I'm not dealing with that BS lol

JoAnna &hearts's Jett Due January 20; 1 child; Midlothian, TX, United States 6235 posts
17th Mar '13

Well DH works on an average 9 days straight. And has 2-3 days off. From 3pm-4am and then sometimes overtime in the middle of all of that. So basically he works a lot. He's not expected to do anything. He sometimes puts a load in the washer for me when he gets home and then loads the dryer. He gives Jett baths when he's home, takes him to run errands. But other than that he doesn't do housework and I don't expect him to. I do everything, but I like it like that.

Zzz Due July 20 (boy); 1 child; fuuuuuuuu, OH, United States 2072 posts
17th Mar '13
Quoting Jilly'sMommy:" Mine volunteers to help with whatever isn't done. Then once were done we hang out and play cod. I haven't had to ask him or give him a list of what he needs to do."


This

applelove 1 child; auburn, CA, United States 6529 posts
17th Mar '13

Ummm we do equal work when we are both home with the kid, I do more when Daddy is not home.



I do most of the house work and that is just how it has always been. I was a SAH not mom before we had baby and Daddy still did not do much around the house.

[Gryffinwhore♥] Due March 3; 34 kids; Poulsbo, Washington 32871 posts
17th Mar '13

I'll answer from the other side. lol.



I work 2 jobs (totaling 6 days a week), and I go to school 4 days a week after work. When I come home, I kind of expect things to be done because I'm gone from 7am to 8pm. Michael doesn't work, so he can do it.



My kids go to daycare. If he stayed home with them all day, I would feel more obligated to help when I came home.

THE Draco Malfoy 2 kids; Tennessee 20015 posts
17th Mar '13

i should have specified with childcare. i have heard that DH shouldn't have to change diapers, feed or anything like that between working. he works 4:30 pm- 3 am. he usually gets up between 12-2 pm. at most i've gotten him to change her diaper in the time he gets up till he leaves. also get crap for having him do stuff for DD when he's home on Sundays. (works 2-11pm on Saturday)

Tasha & Nika Due December 22 (boy); 1 child; San Jose, CA, United States 16029 posts
17th Mar '13
Quoting Draco'sStalker:" How much do you expect SO/DH to help when they are home? what are the hour limits? like if he has more hours working, does he help less? i'm getting mixed reviews on this topic."



I don't expect him to do anything, but he helps change the sheets, and he does 80% of the cooking at home. He cleans up the kitchen, takes out the garbage.. I actually feel amazingly lucky, because I never have to worry about making dinner and everything he makes is delicious. Be it authentic Japanese Ramen or crab cakes from scratch.. yeah uhm, he needn't do any cleaning ever as long as he sticks with doing the cooking lol

Mom of Tristan/Rayah/Keat 3 kids; Alberta 2068 posts
17th Mar '13

When I'm not pregnant I'm able to keep up with the house work and he really doesn't help much. When I'm pregnant I expect him to help out as much as he can. My hips and lower back are horrible so it is hard for me to do it all on my own.



But if it gets to the point where I can keep up with it once this little one is born I will expect more help from him. As he helps make the mess so he can help clean the house.

Miss Molly! Due August 11 (boy); 3 kids; Ormond Beach, Florida 3276 posts
17th Mar '13

It's a little difficult with us right now. I am a SAHM of a 1 year old and 3 year old and also going to school, plus I'm pregnant so any help around the house is just AWESOME because I get so overwhelmed between the kids and school and being so damn tired and big lol. But, on the other hand, he is a manager at his job and it's very mentally and physically stressful and right now is busy season so he's averaging at 60+ hours a week. So, it's difficult for me not to ask him to do some stuff but at the same time I don't expect him to. He pays all the bills, I take care of the home and further my education.



His "expected chores" are only put his laundry in the basket (socks right side out! lol) and trash nights. He is awesome though and will help me with dishes after dinner some nights and will watch the kiddos while I do house work or go out for a bit if he's home.

Miss Molly! Due August 11 (boy); 3 kids; Ormond Beach, Florida 3276 posts
17th Mar '13

Double post :P

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
17th Mar '13

I expect my husband to help out when he is home. I don't expect him to do everything but, he doesn't get to sit on his ass and have me wait on him hand and foot. I work too. I just don't get a paycheck. Right now my kids have been in bed for 2 hours and I have folded 2 loads of laundry, cleaned their bathroom, put away their toys and am waiting on the dryer for another load. I won't go to bed until midnight by the time all I have to do tonight is finished. It will start all over again tomorrow.



My husband works on the oil rigs so the first day he is home, I cut him a little slack to unwind. After that, he can help me out so that I am not so burned out all the time.