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** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
23rd Mar '13

mama i am so glad to hear you say youre going to make your decision with a clear head!! you are a very wise woman and i give you tremendous props!! Good luck with whatever you decide :) I am going to parent tank you so i can check in lol

** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting malibu.:" That sounds like my BD of my first pregnancy LOL.. granted we were both 18 and extremely immature, but ... [snip!] ... I've been taking care of OUR daughter for the past 4 years 100% alone. ...lol such a joke. Was it worth it though? Totally."

ugh my ex does that too.. the only time he has even spoken to me in the past...4 years was yell at me because his federal taxes got taken for child support and given to me lol. He hasnt seen nor asked about my oldest since he was 18 months old.. he is almost 6 now.
but yeah when he called to b***h at me for the tax thing he said i was either going to drop child support or he was going to take custody of him.. i just laughed.. and said, no judge in their right mind would strip him from a good home and give him to a drug addict loser that cant hold down a job. his dad is... 27 i think now...wait no.. he turns 28 in 2 days lol and he is just as big of a piece as he was back then. Most people never change, they just change their tactics

S U Z I E 3 kids; Venezuela 18556 posts
23rd Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting malibu.:</b>" I'd just like to say that you ladies have helped me tremendously. I have so many supportive PM's on BG ... [snip!] ... Write out all my feelings. Just think about ME and DD. Again, thank you ladies so very much for your advice and support. :)"</blockquote>




You're welcome! :)

3 kids; Intercourse, MD, United States 4616 posts
23rd Mar '13

Mal honestly I think it was a smart call blocking his number. Because then you can sort of get a feel for how your life is going to be without him. This is your choice. Your life. Your family.




The only wary thing that I can say is that it sounds like you really love him. You have to be aware that if you have this child, you will be tied to him forever. Which means that you may be forced to watch him date, marry, and have kids with someone else. You're a tough girl, there's no doubt you CAN do it. It's just something you'd have to be prepared for-you'd never be able to walk away.

min. 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Lorain, Ohio 2462 posts
23rd Mar '13

You definitely need to make the decision entirely on your own. Forget about what everyone else says and thinks-they dont have to live with the outcome. You are bery strong for what youve been through and are currently going through. Its a shame your ex is acting like this. If hes so scared of being a father, what was your relationship about then anyways? Think of your babies.

malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting **
malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting a s h l e y.:" Mal honestly I think it was a smart call blocking his number. Because then you can sort of get a feel ... [snip!] ... tough girl, there's no doubt you CAN do it. It's just something you'd have to be prepared for-you'd never be able to walk away."


Exactly. But according to him, he wont be dating.. marrying.. or definetly having child till after the age of 35. He has some major commitment issues. It took him SO long to even admit that we were in a committed relationship.



&Honestly, I think his dad is to blame for that. His dad is the guy that has like 6 kids from 3 different moms... thinks all women are crazy and to stay away from them all. Dan told me when he told his dad, his dad told him to stay the hell away from me.. that all I wanted was to trap him in hopes that he would be a father figure to Vaida.



&Ironically, right after speaking with him is when he broke up with me. :roll:

malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting min.:" You definitely need to make the decision entirely on your own. Forget about what everyone else says and ... [snip!] ... is acting like this. If hes so scared of being a father, what was your relationship about then anyways? Think of your babies."


Exactly my thoughts. If he didn't want to be a father, or father figure... wth was he doing with me for a year and a half?!



I'm heading to work in an hour- we work together tonight. I'm hoping to stay strong and not act like anything is bothering me.

MilahJames 1 child; Swansboro, North Carolina 4960 posts
23rd Mar '13

All I can tell you is that you shouldn't do something you're not sure you want to do. I still have nightmares about the abortion I had in high school.. I wouldn't have my son now if it weren't for that, because I got pregnant with him less than a year later, but it still haunts me at times.



Don't let your ex SO make any decisions for you. If you want the baby, have it. You can figure out how to be a single mom to two and I'm sure you'd not only figure it out, but be great at it and be so glad you didn't do anything hasty.



It's YOUR body and YOUR decision, though, and if you decide abortion is best for you then feel confident in your decision and roll with it.
I'm here if you ever want to talk. PM me!

Dr. Angelface 2 kids; California 8236 posts
23rd Mar '13

i had one when i was 17. i was pressured into it and not sure i wanted to go through with it......but i did because deep down i knew it was the right choice.
It still was hard and hurt but i do not regret it for one minute.



it would have been a disastrous situation had i gone through with it.



how far along are you now?

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting malibu.:" Exactly my thoughts. If he didn't want to be a father, or father figure... wth was he doing with me ... [snip!] ... I'm heading to work in an hour- we work together tonight. I'm hoping to stay strong and not act like anything is bothering me."


:shock:That would be really hard for me. I wonder if he will even show up?

malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting Sonia[MOBAS]:" :shock:That would be really hard for me. I wonder if he will even show up?"


It is super hard. We just ignore each other.



But I go in looking smoking hott to get on his nerves :twisted:

malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting MilahJames:" All I can tell you is that you shouldn't do something you're not sure you want to do. I still have nightmares ... [snip!] ... abortion is best for you then feel confident in your decision and roll with it. I'm here if you ever want to talk. PM me!"


Thank you. I realize now that I was only thinking about HIM and making HIM happy. But franky, he doesn't know wtf makes him happy right now. He's just angry and scared.



By the way... my first name on my girl list is Mila ;)

malibu. 2 kids; Grand Rapids, Michigan 6317 posts
23rd Mar '13
Quoting Dr. Angelface:" i had one when i was 17. i was pressured into it and not sure i wanted to go through with it......but ... [snip!] ... regret it for one minute. it would have been a disastrous situation had i gone through with it. how far along are you now?"


I am 7 weeks. I will be 8 on my appointment.



My biggest thing is that I DO have reasons to NOT have this baby... I just don't know if they are valid reasons. Or should I say important reasons.

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
24th Mar '13
Quoting malibu.:" It is super hard. We just ignore each other. But I go in looking smoking hott to get on his nerves :twisted:"


LOL, I think I would do the same. What kind of work do you do?