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Cast Your Vote:

    • Bite back -- Votes: 10
    • pop in the mouth -- Votes: 1
    • soap, hot sauce, pepper in the mouth -- Votes: 0
    • keep trying time outs -- Votes: 10
    • other/explain -- Votes: 8
Biting child user banned
23rd Mar '13

So I read this forum earlier of a young lady who had an issue with her two year old biting her friend's child every time the friend came over. It was getting to the point where the friend was getting upset and not coming over the young lady's home anymore which is understandable bc if someone's child kept biting my child and breaking skin at times Id be pretty pissed. The young lady was in fear of losing her close friend over this issue. She said she tried talking to her daughter and even time outs but all failed and she continued to bite so she was asking for suggestions. A few moms said hot sauce, pepper, and soap in the mouth. Some said pop them in the mouth. Both of which seems kind of extreme to me but some said bite back (including myself) not hard enough to break skin but to show her it hurts bc IMO a child may do things not knowing that it hurts others until they realize that it hurts themselves. My daughter bit once, she got bit back and it never happened again. This is my opinion and not to be taken and bashed. So What's your take on it?

misanthrope 2 kids; Ramona, California 15431 posts
23rd Mar '13

IMO biting a child is abuse. I would keep up with the time outs. There are also some good books that you can read to her. I know one is called ouch biting hurts.

Leah+2 2 kids; Texas 5797 posts
23rd Mar '13

How old is the child? And honestly if the mom knows she's a biter she needs to be on her like white on rice when others are around and start noticing cues before the child bites. Then she can redirect or remove the child from the situation.

S U Z I E 3 kids; Venezuela 18556 posts
23rd Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ღFrodoliciousღ:</b>" Everyone saying popping them, biting them, using soap, pepper, and hot sauce (wtf?!) is an idiot. None ... [snip!] ... a behavior. They need to understand it's wrong, and hurts, not fear having shit stuffed in their mouths or being bitten. "</blockquote>




But although it was it you who bit the child, it was biting the child back that got them to stop.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46477 posts
status 23rd Mar '13

Redirect.
Talk about gentle touching.

user banned 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 4666 posts
23rd Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ღFrodoliciousღ:</b>" Everyone saying popping them, biting them, using soap, pepper, and hot sauce (wtf?!) is an idiot. None ... [snip!] ... a behavior. They need to understand it's wrong, and hurts, not fear having shit stuffed in their mouths or being bitten. "</blockquote>



Idiot? No. Just bc something works for you does not mean that it will work for all children and what can you really talk to a 2 year old about that they are really going to understand. They need to know that it hurts. You can tell them it hurts all you want but they aren't really going to understand until you show them. Putting a two year old in time out is only going to last for maybe 12 seconds then they're wondering why they can't run around and play. A child should be afraid that if bite or hit a child they're going to get bit or hit back. Its consequences for their actions. Ever heard of treating people how you want to be treated? That applies here. Don't wanna get bit don't bite. It stopped immediately with my daughter.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46477 posts
status 23rd Mar '13
Quoting You and me + 3:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ღFrodoliciousღ:</b>" Everyone saying popping them, ... [snip!] ... people how you want to be treated? That applies here. Don't wanna get bit don't bite. It stopped immediately with my daughter."


It doesn't mean it's not abusive.

user banned 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 4666 posts
23rd Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" It doesn't mean it's not abusive."</blockquote>




Its a difference between abuse and discipline. That's what's wrong with the world now people can't parent their children without someone somewhere screaming abuse.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46477 posts
status 23rd Mar '13
Quoting You and me + 3:" <blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" It doesn't mean it's not abusive."</blockquote> ... [snip!] ... That's what's wrong with the world now people can't parent their children without someone somewhere screaming abuse."


Spanking, popping, hitting, biting, "hot-saucing", etc. are all PUNISHMENTS, not discipline.



Discipline implies that there is teaching/learning happening.



Biting your child because they bit you isn't teaching them WHY biting is inappropriate, just that it hurts.

user banned 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 4666 posts
23rd Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" Spanking, popping, hitting, biting, "hot-saucing", etc. are all PUNISHMENTS, not discipline. Discipline ... [snip!] ... happening. Biting your child because they bit you isn't teaching them WHY biting is inappropriate, just that it hurts. "</blockquote>




Time outs and taking toys and games away are punishments too... is that abusive? The point is to teach them that it hurts so they won't do it to others. Correct?

Bri + 1.5 <3 Due October 20 (girl); 1 child; Florida 4350 posts
23rd Mar '13

I myself wouldn't bite my child back, but there are many cases I have seen where biting back does work. My cousins, a little brother & sister used to fight, bad. They were two & three at the time. The two year old was a biter. He bit his sister so bad she was bleeding & it whelped. She got sick of it & bit him back just as hard, he never bit her or anyone else again.



But like I said, I wouldn't bite my child or encourage another child to bite him back.

Mama to J ♥ 1 child; Atlanta, GA, United States 2039 posts
23rd Mar '13

Yeah, saying biting a child is abuse....but your dog bit your child? So, was your child abused? :roll: I mean, if someone literally just ran up and bit a child and broke the skin, of course, but a parent who does it lightly only to show its not nice, is not abusing their child...



I would not bite my child, personally, but I would react in a way that scared her into not biting again. Usually if she realizes she hurt me in some way, rather its hitting me or throwing something at me, if I act like I am crying, she wont do it again. She will ask me if I am okay. haha

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46477 posts
status 23rd Mar '13
Quoting You and me + 3:" <blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" Spanking, popping, hitting, biting, "hot-saucing", ... [snip!] ... away are punishments too... is that abusive? The point is to teach them that it hurts so they won't do it to others. Correct?"


I didn't say all punishments were abusive, but time out gives the opportunity for the child and parent to calm down enough to talk through things. Hitting, biting, etc. is a knee-jerk, emotional reaction that teaches nothing but big people get to hit/bite and you don't.



The fact that it hurts isn't the only reason it is inappropriate.

Wiggity Wack 1 child; Connecticut 10780 posts
23rd Mar '13

Take away a toy every time she bites. She can earn them back by going a week without biting.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46477 posts
status 23rd Mar '13
Quoting Mama to J ♥:" Yeah, saying biting a child is abuse....but your dog bit your child? So, was your child abused? :roll: ... [snip!] ... its hitting me or throwing something at me, if I act like I am crying, she wont do it again. She will ask me if I am okay. haha"


So, you are comparing yourself to a dog?