Reply
Doing The Best I Can Momma Rawks 1 child; Iowa 7180 posts
24th Mar '13

My fiance died a year and a half ago. I have been a single parent for a year and a half. I was a stay-at-home-mom and within two weeks, I went from being homeless (my fiance's family kicked us out of his house--I had no legal right to stay), having less than thirty dollars, and having no job/income, to having a job, buying us a home, and ended up finishing my semester (it was midterm when he died) with a 4.0



I don't know how I did it, but I did what I had to. My son has a roof over his head, new clothes that fit, food in his belly (though he is a picky eater--I supplement with Pediasure and vitamins), and is a well-natured, happy, wonderful little guy.



I work forty hours a week so that not only are our bills paid, but so we have extra money. My son has everything he needs and more. My job is being a nanny, so my son is able to come with me. I have money saved up in the bank, and just today, I threw him a huge birthday party that cost a few hundred bucks.



But this does not satisfy anyone. Instead, I am critiqued to death. Family members talk behind my back and ask each other if they think I am feeding my son (those asking are a*****es--aka my late-fiance's psychotic parents). My home is too messy (you try nannying three kids, cleaning up after them for 10 hours a day, and then coming home and wanting to scrub your own damn place--it is clean enough, not always spotless, but I do what I can). My son is too spoiled (he is the only grandson on one side, and the only grandchild on another--yea, he gets a lot of f**king toys).



Tonight after his birthday party, I was told that he's going to grow up and have a lesser life because he only has one parent. Whereas if he had two loving parents at home, he would grow up to be a much different, much better person. I must not discipline him enough, because with nobody to share the work with, I probably get lazy and let him get away with more when I'm tired.



Really, the list goes on.



I AM DOING MY DAMN BEST! I feel like I am ten times better at parenting than a lot of other people in my situation would be. I wish more than anything that my fiance was here. I would give up almost everything for that to be so.



But he's not.

☆º×ß¡±©µ×º☆ 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Grand Forks, ND, United States 46086 posts
24th Mar '13

Dint let them bring you down its sad they critique you about two parents being better. Your so passed away thats something you cant help. Keep your head up youre doing a good job

A&J. ♥ 1 child; Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 5613 posts
24th Mar '13

I've read your posts about them before. If they can't respect YOU, the mother of their grandchild, then they don't deserve to interact with your son IMO. You are doing a great job. Let their bullshit roll off your shoulders.

Simply, Mom 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Upland, 11738 posts
24th Mar '13

I am so sorry for your loss. And I am so sorry that you have to put up with inconsiderate jerks. You are doing a great job. People used to say I didn't feed my son because he is genetically skinny as hell.

user banned 1 child; Bluefield, Virginia 1053 posts
24th Mar '13

not much from someone you dont know, but damn, am i proud of you!

.:Mini.Me:. 1 child; Arizona 406 posts
24th Mar '13

You're doing a great job! That might even be an understatement.. f**k what they have to say.. YOU know you're doing a great job and the best you can, and as long as your son is happy that's all that matters.. Being raised by just one parent might not even effect the kid at all, it just depends on how you raise them.. and it seems to me you're doing a good job.. Let them talk their shit

Captain Obvious 2 kids; Havana, Cuba 25634 posts
24th Mar '13
Quoting A&J. ♥:" I've read your posts about them before. If they can't respect YOU, the mother of their grandchild, then ... [snip!] ... then they don't deserve to interact with your son IMO. You are doing a great job. Let their bullshit roll off your shoulders."


:!:

Momma Rawks 1 child; Iowa 7180 posts
24th Mar '13
Quoting A&J. ♥:" I've read your posts about them before. If they can't respect YOU, the mother of their grandchild, then ... [snip!] ... then they don't deserve to interact with your son IMO. You are doing a great job. Let their bullshit roll off your shoulders."


Normally that works, but it wasn't just them this time.



It's kind of a just a build up of several people making little comments, and I just get to a breaking point where I'm just flustered. People make me crazy!

mom2andrew&carter 18 kids; Leesburg, Florida 2159 posts
25th Mar '13

you are doing an amazing job and dont let them get you done.

I Stab People 3 kids; Zambia 6604 posts
25th Mar '13

i feel the exact same, im a more recently single mom but i can definatly relate. nothing is ever good enough, and when i get to a point where im proud that i did x y and z all by myself, someone has to come up behind me and say i could have done x or y or z a different way or better or have better time management. its just too much to live up to.



i finally just got a cleaning lady because im sick of my MIL saying my house is always messy.. hello i work full time and have 3 kids what do you expect? but her son cant even get up in time to get the kids on the bus on the days i work, and its okay, cuz hes "tired" SMH. double standards..

O ♥ G 2 kids; Pride, Louisiana 10723 posts
26th Mar '13

Oh screw everyone! You're doing a fantastic job! Especially with what you've been through! I can't imagine going through that heartbreak and still managing to accomplish everything that you have! The only person's opinion you should care for is your son's. Everyone else can suck it!