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how do you explain? tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
29th Mar '13

Surgery to a 4 almost 5 year old boy. On the 11th he is having eye surgery in both eyes. He has no idea yet. If I tell him he is having surgery he is going to ask what that is. I cant tell him that the doctors are going to put him to sleep and cut into his eyes to fix them. He doesnt even understand that their is something wrong with his eyes and if I tell him they are going to cut his eyes open all he is going to think is that someone is going to hurt him. I dont want him going in scared out of his mind thinking some guy is going to hurt him but I dont want the day to come and he doesnt know wtf is going on. Maybe telling him they are just going to put him to sleep and fix them and he will wake up all better will suffice? Gah idk. For those of you that have had kids that had surgery before what did you tell them?

nutmeg. California 22281 posts
29th Mar '13

DO NOT use words like "cut". You say the Doctor is going to "fix" his eyes. Explain whatever the problem is to him, in age appropriate terms, and then tell him the Doctor will fix that problem.

Aiden,Jared&Olivia's momm 35 kids; Louisville, Kentucky 686 posts
29th Mar '13
Quoting nutmeg.:" DO NOT use words like "cut". You say the Doctor is going to "fix" his eyes. Explain whatever the problem is to him, in age appropriate terms, and then tell him the Doctor will fix that problem."


I was gonna say the same thing.
Don't say cut my 6 year old would flip the hell out if I said cut your eyes open or whatever

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
29th Mar '13

I would have told him a long time ago. Just be upfront. I dont know how keeping something like this from him will help any. It will make it worse once its time to go in for it.

Just tell him he has to get his eyes fixed by the dr. And he will be asleep for it.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
29th Mar '13

I used cut to explain it for my dd's lol and she thought it was so cool and couldnt wait to get it done andhave scars etc...lol she was 3.5 yrs old.

tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
29th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting crazy coupon lady:</b>" I would have told him a long time ago. Just be upfront. I dont know how keeping something like this from ... [snip!] ... it worse once its time to go in for it. Just tell him he has to get his eyes fixed by the dr. And he will be asleep for it."</blockquote>




We just found out on Wednesday and made the appointment yesterday so its not like we've known for very long at all. Thats why I am asking so we can slowly prepare him during the next 2 weeks.

tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
29th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting nutmeg.:</b>" DO NOT use words like "cut". You say the Doctor is going to "fix" his eyes. Explain whatever the problem is to him, in age appropriate terms, and then tell him the Doctor will fix that problem."</blockquote>




Thats why I ask. I know I cannot say cut or open his eye up because he will completely freak. What if he asks how the doctor is going to fix it? Im hoping just being like youre going to go to sleep and the doctor will fix it and you wake up all better will be good enough for him. But then I worry if he asks how its going to be done.

tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
29th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting crazy coupon lady:</b>" I used cut to explain it for my dd's lol and she thought it was so cool and couldnt wait to get it done andhave scars etc...lol she was 3.5 yrs old."</blockquote>




I wish my son was like that but hes a complete wussy over the tiniest scratch and freaks out over blood and things like that lol. I hate having to sugar coat it but thats what works best for him. To much information will keep him in a panic and nervous state until it happens and he will fight it.

The Bear and The Bird 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42574 posts
29th Mar '13

I would just say they're going to fix it with medicine and leave it at that. And be sure to let him know the medicine will make his eyes blurry for a few days while they work if there's going to be any temporary vision loss.

mommy to C, B and F 19 kids; 1 angel baby; Escondido, California 1175 posts
29th Mar '13

My son had tounge tie surery at 3 they put him under I just told him were goin to the doc and you gunna take a nap and when you wake up youll be abke to move your tounge more I made it sound fun for him and he was excited seei him wake up was hard cause he was so out of itbut he never cried or got worried just tell him gunna take a nap and the doctors going to fix your eyes so when you wake up they will be better

tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
29th Mar '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting 4 til Gwen:</b>" I would just say they're going to fix it with medicine and leave it at that. And be sure to let him know ... [snip!] ... know the medicine will make his eyes blurry for a few days while they work if there's going to be any temporary vision loss."</blockquote>



Ooooooo thank you! He loves medicine so this would probably work very well for him as an explanation.