First of all, I have a daughter who is almost 2.5 years old. My journey into motherhood was rough, to say the least. I had severe PPD and PTSD because I was traumatized due to what happened during her birth and I have little to no support system where I live. I almost lost the only support I had here in 2011 when my husband underwent and almost died during unexpected open heart surgery for an aortic aneurysm and valve repair. I know, some moms have gone through worse, and I know I haven't always dealt with everything in the best manner. This is the way it's always been. I've always taken things my daughter has done so personally, from her newborn days til now, whether it was just her being fussy or throwing a full blown tantrum. My husband looks at me sometimes and wonders why I'm freaking out over something she's doing and I know my actions are only making it worse, but I just can't seem to contain my frustration (which usually comes out as me raising my voice). I'm not the chill, laid-back person I used to be. I'm no longer on medication for depression, but I seriously think it's time I go back on something for anxiety because I know I do have it pretty badly. I think the main things causing this is thinking that something will happen to my husband and I'll be left alone to raise my daughter alone.
I guess in the end, my question is have any other moms out there felt the way I feel? If so, what did you do? Was there anything that helped you to overcome it or at least feel like you were able to function a little bit better? Thanks for reading and please don't be quick to pass judgment.
Do you get ANY breaks, anytime to yourself?
When my patience is running short, I know I need an afternoon to do nothing but take care of me.
Yes. I would look into medication. I took up smoking again :/
I would try talking to your primary care provider about vitamin D supplements they have been shown to help eliminate some depression/anxiety or at least bring it down to a normal level.
Quoting Coffee Milk:" Do you get ANY breaks, anytime to yourself? When my patience is running short, I know I need an afternoon to do nothing but take care of me."
Not really. My normal day consists of going to work at 8 am, working til 2 pm, coming home by 2:30, I'll see my husband for an hour til he leaves for work and I'll have the rest of the night with my daughter. So the only time I really have without her is when I'm at work. Don't get me wrong, I like the adult interaction, but sometimes I just wish I had my mom close by so I could just have a break to have a few days or even a few hours to myself.