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staceynicole Due June 10 (boy); Tallahassee, Florida 91 posts
11th Apr '13
Quoting Wonderstruck ♥:" Oh i have oodles of screenshots and texts etc ;)"


thats good use it against him in court if he try anything stupid lol

Circle K 1 child; 1 angel baby; Federal Way, WA, United States 9372 posts
11th Apr '13
Quoting Wonderstruck ♥:" That's sadly what I assumed. Do you know the "qualifications" to get a temp. custody order in place? or how long it would take? I posted a topic but got no replies."



www.courts.wa.gov



You can find information and forms there.

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 26168 posts
status 11th Apr '13
Quoting Wonderstruck ♥:" Hypothetical question: If a father is on the BC - in WA state - and they don't have a parenting plan ... [snip!] ... Is it 50 /50 ? Like could BD run off with said child and it wouldn't be considered kidnapping ? Google is not helping me..."


I know that my ex tried to take off with Lily and the only reason he gave Lily back was because I was chasing him around town trying to get Lily back with the cops..... his grandparents finally told him to give Lily to me. The police couldnt force him to give Lily to me... in most states if both parents are on the BC then whoever has physical custody, as in the child being in their care/in their arms has all the custodial rights and do not need to give the child over until a court order says otherwise.



So you do not need to give your child to him if you are afraid of what he may do without a court order, that is your right to do so.

Wonderstruck ♥ Due March 15; 2 kids; Seattle, Washington 482 posts
11th Apr '13
Quoting FroggysMommy:" I know that my ex tried to take off with Lily and the only reason he gave Lily back was because I was ... [snip!] ... do not need to give your child to him if you are afraid of what he may do without a court order, that is your right to do so."

I always heard/assumed that looked poorly on me in court - that I was denying him his rights to his kids and thats frowned upon ?

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 26168 posts
status 11th Apr '13
Quoting Wonderstruck ♥:" I always heard/assumed that looked poorly on me in court - that I was denying him his rights to his kids and thats frowned upon ?"


No! That is a misconception, especially if you have reason to believe he may be planning something. Now it IS looked down upon to not allow access when you have a court order allowing him rights, you must abide by that. You can also say "You can come to the house and see the kids (or better yet, a public setting) I wont bother you all and you can see the kids as much as you want. You just cant take the children on your own until a court order is in place." It is only denying access when there is a court order you are going against or refuse to let him come join you at a play place or come see them at your house. Though, legally you do not need to let him see them AT ALL until a court order says otherwise."



I had to call the police on my ex and the cop said "He is within his right to see the child. But I will help you because you are worried for her safety. Get your daughter in your hands, get in the car and meet the other cop down the street. Don't even waste time with the car seat, just hold her until you get to the other cop." So I went up, he handed Lily to me SCREAMING at me and when we met up with the cop they said "Under no circumstances do you hand your child to him without a court order. You do not let him take her alone because that gives him full parental rights and you nothing until a court order says otherwise."



But I have only heard from my ex once since that day, and I wanted to f**king kill him. We still need to go to court to terminate rights but they wont do that to a single parent, so Im fucked right now.



But its not denying access, its your right as a parent to want a safeguard in place that protects your ex too... it makes sure that there is legal access that neither of you can go against. So it really is in his best interest to get a court order as well.

Wonderstruck ♥ Due March 15; 2 kids; Seattle, Washington 482 posts
11th Apr '13
Quoting FroggysMommy:" No! That is a misconception, especially if you have reason to believe he may be planning something. ... [snip!] ... there is legal access that neither of you can go against. So it really is in his best interest to get a court order as well."

Oh my goodness ! Thank you.
I went down to the court house today and met with a family law facilitator, got the papers, the fee waiver form, and a number to contact a low income lawyer.



Luckily SO's step-family is all family lawyers so they said they'd help out too.
Im scared and so badly want to back out but i KNOW this is what needs to happen for my kids safety.

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 26168 posts
status 11th Apr '13
Quoting Wonderstruck ♥:" Oh my goodness ! Thank you. I went down to the court house today and met with a family law facilitator, ... [snip!] ... said they'd help out too. Im scared and so badly want to back out but i KNOW this is what needs to happen for my kids safety."


Yeah, don't do what I did and put it off. I hate that he has rights, he doesnt deserve her. I was able to change her name but had to fight the court system twice to get it approved.