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wombie 4 kids; Zimbabwe 73281 posts
15th Apr '13

I probably wouldn't be excited about it if I were in that situation, however, from the outside looking in I can understand the girlfriend's hesitation in meeting the ex.



the bottom line is that even if things ended badly with my husband, I know he's a good father to our children and I would have to trust his judgement with new girlfriends. I know he would never put our kids in an unsafe situation and that knowledge would be comforting in an awkward situation like the one described in the OP.

LittleBear's mama 3 kids; Ontario 480 posts
15th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Carissa Biron:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty ... [snip!] ... your exs life. That includes what and whom they are around during their parenting time. With the exception of suspected abuse."</blockquote>




Wrong....so wrong. When their parenting choices were questionable at times and they made really horrible parenting choices in the past and have proven they arent responsible then you have every right to question who they bring around your child. I have this situation with my ex and because he has chosen to bring her home to the kids, and she spends every weekend at his place with my kids then i have a right to know who he is bringing around my kids. Not only that if she is helping to parent my children, which i am fine with, then we all need to be on the same page with regards to some of the parenting. We are actually all meeting to discuss things next weekend, because some issues have already come up that need to be dealt with

CJKB+JMB=AMB 1 child; Watertown, New York 2525 posts
15th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting LittleBear's mama:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... We are actually all meeting to discuss things next weekend, because some issues have already come up that need to be dealt with"</blockquote>




Exactly... Not everyone is lucky enough to have the perfect bd :eyeroll: if someone is playing such a big role in your kids life and is being parented by someone else there's no good reason NOT to meet them. And the argument"well you shouldn't have had kids with that person" is completely moronic I don't think I have to explain why

LittleBear's mama 3 kids; Ontario 480 posts
15th Apr '13
Quoting Carissa Biron:" <blockquote><b>Quoting LittleBear's mama:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty ... [snip!] ... And the argument"well you shouldn't have had kids with that person" is completely moronic I don't think I have to explain why"

So true. It has taken three years before my ex has agreed to sit down and discuss things like adults, and really thats only because i spoke to the girlfriend and she agreed that we should. We shall see how things go. I have a few concerns that I am sure the ex will dismiss. Personally I think he is afraid I will tell his gf all his skeletons (I have told her a few...but there are sooooo many more). Meh whatever.

Fatty McRunnerPants 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Clearlake, California 59390 posts
15th Apr '13
Quoting Carissa Biron:" <blockquote><b>Quoting LittleBear's mama:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty ... [snip!] ... And the argument"well you shouldn't have had kids with that person" is completely moronic I don't think I have to explain why"


No, you do have to explain why. Explain why it's completely acceptable to have someone stick his dick in you MAKE THE CHOICE to have his child and then all of a sudden decide that he isn't responsible enough to not have his parenting and lifestyle choices questioned by his baby momma. Ladies, this is why many women are jokes. The father of our children are not themselves children. If we break up with them, at some point we trusted them enough to make the choice to have a child with them. THIS IS WHY the other women doesn't want to meet the crazy ass ex. Because we know how women are.



You (speaking in the general sense) don't want to meet the woman because your child is around her. If you were really that worried you (general you) would have done something about it legally. You want to size her up, compare her to you and then nit pick the shit out of her possibly causing drama along the way. Because God knows many women aren't mature when it comes to their relationships and break ups. Even less so when children are involved.



Point blank: choose carefully who you spread your legs to or deal with the concequences like a big girl.

CJKB+JMB=AMB 1 child; Watertown, New York 2525 posts
15th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" No, you do have to explain why. Explain why it's completely acceptable to have someone stick his dick ... [snip!] ... are involved. Point blank: choose carefully who you spread your legs to or deal with the concequences like a big girl."</blockquote>




Oh I forgot every woman on earth with kids made the decision to have a baby with the guy she did it with :D
Seriously? You just put every single woman in one.category saying there always going to start drama and automatically have a problem with their bd's gf. Bullshit read some previous on this thread plenty of.women shared there experience with baby daddies gf are they are they all drama seeking jealous b***hes? Uh no... Your way of thinking is so biased and narrow minded

LittleBear's mama 3 kids; Ontario 480 posts
15th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Carissa Biron:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" No, you do have to explain why. ... [snip!] ... daddies gf are they are they all drama seeking jealous b***hes? Uh no... Your way of thinking is so biased and narrow minded"</blockquote>



I agree! I actually like my bd gf, and i hope she smartens his ass up! In my situation we are going to discuss things with regards to raising the kids. I am totally cool with her being around them, we just all need to be on the same page with the major stuff. My bd and i were married, we had actually been together for fourteen years. Long story, but we ended up divorced. He is irresponsible with the kids. Wasnt that way when we were together cause i kept shit in order. I think thats how it is alot of the time, the women keep things going, and then when the men are alone, they cant keep it together. Dont get me wrong, he is good at the outdoor fun stuff, but he sucks big ball sac when it comes to the responsible stuff

Fatty McRunnerPants 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Clearlake, California 59390 posts
15th Apr '13
Quoting Carissa Biron:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:</b>" No, you do have to explain why. ... [snip!] ... daddies gf are they are they all drama seeking jealous b***hes? Uh no... Your way of thinking is so biased and narrow minded"


Bullshit. Every single woman in this thread CHOSE to have a child. CHOSE to parent a child and CHOSE to do so with the person they did. I say "chose" because giving birth to a live child and parenting that child is a multi step process with several choices to make. Anyone who argues differently has a victim mentality.



I never said "all women are drama seeking jealous b***hes". I said many :wink:

pam2 Berlin, Germany 7 posts
16th Apr '13

Where is the trust in this situation ?

LittleBear's mama 3 kids; Ontario 480 posts
16th Apr '13
Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" Bullshit. Every single woman in this thread CHOSE to have a child. CHOSE to parent a child and CHOSE ... [snip!] ... who argues differently has a victim mentality. I never said "all women are drama seeking jealous b***hes". I said many :wink:"

They may have chosen to have a child with that person, but that doesn't mean the relationship with that person didn't break down at some point and they split up. It is inevitable that the ex will find someone new, and as parents we want the best for our children. And that includes being skeptical over someone our ex chooses to bring around our child. Some women may choose to seek drama, while I think the vast majority just want to make sure the ex is bringing the right person around our kids. Whoever the new person may be will influence our child, and as parents we just want to be sure that it is positive influence and not negative. For example, my ex new gf has kids already, one 16 girl and one 18 boy (he is in college). I want to be sure her daughter is not influencing my daughter with regards to boys. My daughter is 10 and at an impressionable age and does not need to hear about boyfriends, exploits and sex partners from the 16 year old.