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MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Brink:" <blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" Wanting your mate to screw you is not ... [snip!] ... himself. Yeah sex is natural but there are other forms of intimacy then penetration. This women seems to just want to get off."


No I wouldn't at all. I don't think any normal healthy person should sit back with a low sex drive. There are tons of resources on how to raise it. In fact I don't get why men or women wouldn't make the effort if obviously their mate desires a bit more.

killingbird 5evr 2 kids; 1 angel baby; North Carolina 10126 posts
status 20th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" A toy isn't a substitute for sex with your mate."</blockquote>




When you're ravenous and want sex often and your partner doesn't, it helps with the in-betweens. No ones saying stop having sex. If you're horny and your SO cant keep up, why not a toy?

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Killingℬird(17):" <blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" A toy isn't a substitute for sex with ... [snip!] ... it helps with the in-betweens. No ones saying stop having sex. If you're horny and your SO cant keep up, why not a toy?"

Well sure masturbation is great :D. But like it's supposed to be an addition not a substitue really ;).

Hy'ska 2 kids; Washington 50677 posts
20th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" No I wouldn't at all. I don't think any normal healthy person should sit back with a low sex drive. ... [snip!] ... on how to raise it. In fact I don't get why men or women wouldn't make the effort if obviously their mate desires a bit more. "</blockquote>




Sex isn't a huge deal to everyone.

killingbird 5evr 2 kids; 1 angel baby; North Carolina 10126 posts
status 20th Apr '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" Well sure masturbation is great :D. But like it's supposed to be an addition not a substitue really ;)."</blockquote>



I'm not disagreeing.
But 3-4x/week is unrealistic for some people. I have zero sex drive this pregnancy. DH gets it twice a week if he's lucky. I'd never tell him he couldn't whack it to hold him over till I want him again.

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Brink:" <blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" No I wouldn't at all. I don't think any ... [snip!] ... make the effort if obviously their mate desires a bit more. "</blockquote> Sex isn't a huge deal to everyone."

Which is generally the sign that you should at least make and effort to find out why. I'm not saying that it should be the focus of a relationship. But if it bothers your mate, then maybe you should look into why your drive is so low. If you both have low drives, then it doesn't matter I imagine.

Vanilla MILFshake. 1 child; Georgia 5416 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting MysticWitchKat:" No I wouldn't at all. I don't think any normal healthy person should sit back with a low sex drive. ... [snip!] ... on how to raise it. In fact I don't get why men or women wouldn't make the effort if obviously their mate desires a bit more. "


Well, sometimes it really isn't something that most men want to come out and talk about. They may feel embarrassed about it. It took DH well over 6 months to actually tell me there was something like that going on. I could really see a guy not wanting to come out about it if their partner is literally bitching because they won't have sex with them all the time. They would probably feel like they were letting their SO down or something.

[JadeLee] 1 child; Minnesota 12190 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting MysticWitchKat:" No I wouldn't at all. I don't think any normal healthy person should sit back with a low sex drive. ... [snip!] ... on how to raise it. In fact I don't get why men or women wouldn't make the effort if obviously their mate desires a bit more. "

Honestly with SO and I he is the one that would have sex 3-4 times a week. I would never be able to get shit done or relax if SO and I had sex that often. I don't even want to up my sex drive that much. 1 or 2 times a week is fine with me and he can take care of himself if he wants more.



I don't get where you are coming from at all.

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Killingℬird(17):" <blockquote><b>Quoting MysticWitchKat:</b>" Well sure masturbation is great :D. But ... [snip!] ... DH gets it twice a week if he's lucky. I'd never tell him he couldn't whack it to hold him over till I want him again."


Bahahah I think in your case that's understandable. We all have periods in which it happens really. I had my one ovary removed at 15, and had zero sex drive for a year because of it. However in normal times 3-4 times a week really isn't asking all that much if you ask me.

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting [JadeLee]:" Honestly with SO and I he is the one that would have sex 3-4 times a week. I would never be able to get ... [snip!] ... times a week is fine with me and he can take care of himself if he wants more. I don't get where you are coming from at all."


I don't get how sex 3-4 times a week is going to impact how much you get done in the house.

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Vanilla MILFshake.:" Well, sometimes it really isn't something that most men want to come out and talk about. They may feel ... [snip!] ... because they won't have sex with them all the time. They would probably feel like they were letting their SO down or something."


True, which is why I suggested it might be something else. Sometimes stress, depression, erectile dysfunction can be an issue. And in a culture where men are encouraged to bury their issues, they always don't want to tell you.

Mandi Bass 1 child; Minnesota 1026 posts
20th Apr '13

A toy is definitely something that you need to look into. You're pregnant.... and that makes you horny. Your SO has a low sex drive and you can't expect him to just have sex with you every time that you want it. That's not how it works, and you are being selfish and ridiculous. Get a vibrator or learn to do it with your hands and cut the poor man some slack.

Mandi Bass 1 child; Minnesota 1026 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting MysticWitchKat:" I don't get how sex 3-4 times a week is going to impact how much you get done in the house."


Because it takes away time for cleaning, doing laundry, showering, relaxing, etc.
SO and I only have sex 1-2 times a week because I need the time for other things.

[JadeLee] 1 child; Minnesota 12190 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting MysticWitchKat:" I don't get how sex 3-4 times a week is going to impact how much you get done in the house."

Because when I have class or work from 6 or 7am, and so works until 6pm. Don't you relax for a little while after you get home? I sure as hell do and So does so. I rest from 5 to 5:30 or 6 depending when I get home and then I cook from 6-7 and usually do some reading for homework or help DD. After Supper is cleaning time, DD doesn't go to bed until 8:30 or 9. And I am ready for bed too since most of the time I have been up since 5 am.
We have our sex on my days off and on the weekends that I have off. And that does not equal 3-4 times a week after figuring in everything else (Showering, Grocery Shopping, Homework, Study time, Spending time with DD, Laundry weekend, DD's Dance class, Going to see his family, Going to see my family.)

MysticWitchKat 2052 posts
20th Apr '13
Quoting Mandi Bass:" Because it takes away time for cleaning, doing laundry, showering, relaxing, etc. SO and I only have sex 1-2 times a week because I need the time for other things."

Eh the amount of time it takes to screw doesn't take up enough time to eat into things, unless you have some marathon sessions.