so im not sure how to handle this. my daughters father hasent been much in her life. his mom had contacted me and ever since lilys first birthday lily spends weekends there now. (her father lives in the house too) but yesterday was 420 and he had posted a status about going to a sober rave last night. like my daughter sits at home with his mom. from my understanding its his mom taking care of her not him. he himself hasent gave me any money but he works. one time his parents sent her home with some new clothes. but he never does shit. i feel like he should be with her on the weekends he haa her! gr. i wanna bring it up but he has me blocked on fb. and its people telling me and showing me what he posts on fb. about going out. so he maybget a little mad
Its obvious the grandparents are the caregivers.
So, are you happy she goes there to see them? Or would you like to have her with you more since she is not there with her father?
tell people to stop being drama hungry and showing you what he posts on FB... :? Clearly they're doing it because they know you'll probably get upset over it. Can you go over there and talk to him about it yourself? Have you asked his mother if he' around at all while your daughter is there? Put him on child support if you need it, and he's working.
<blockquote><b>Quoting A Beautiful Disaster:</b>" Its obvious the grandparents are the caregivers. So, are you happy she goes there to see them? Or would you like to have her with you more since she is not there with her father?"</blockquote>
no. im okay with her being with his mom. she loves her alot. it just makes me mad that hed do that
It's up to you... I mean fb always causes drama and all but if u don't want her to go over there anymore that's on you. She might ask why she can't see daddy in the future and you can if you want mention that he was irresponsible but I know sometimes I just want my time alone without my kids so I get a baby sitter and go out. As long as he's not putting her in danger it's not really a problem and I think his parents would be hurt if they couldn't see her cause it sound like they care for her.
Now the money thing that's on you too cause taking care of a child is pricy and if you need help you need help so that I would personally go over and talk to him about but I wouldn't bring up the you go out blah blah cause that will probly start a fight
<blockquote><b>Quoting StephanieRae.:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting A Beautiful Disaster:</b>" Its obvious the grandparents are ... [snip!] ... no. im okay with her being with his mom. she loves her alot. it just makes me mad that hed do that"</blockquote>
I don't see why? I mean its understandable to be upsetting but his MOTHER asked to have your child over not HIM. If he doesn't wanna step up and be there for her it's his loss but I don't know what you expect of him when clearly you should be expecting him to be doing exactly what he has been all along. Duh.
Quoting StephanieRae.:" <blockquote><b>Quoting A Beautiful Disaster:</b>" Its obvious the grandparents are ... [snip!] ... no. im okay with her being with his mom. she loves her alot. it just makes me mad that hed do that"
I think thats great that you see the importance for grandma to be in her life.
Now you just have to come to terms that BD is just a little boy, doing little boy things, and you change that or make it different, just accept it and keep being a great mom no matter what he does.
It was his mother that asked for her not him so clearly he didnt want visits. You cant be mad about that. And if you want money contact child support.
Honestly, I see why it would be frustrating, but you should just be happy she gets to see him sometimes and that his mother wants to be involved to the point of wanting her every other weekend. What he does is his own business as long as the child is not in danger. I think being blocked on FB is a good thing, and you need to tell your friends or whoever is telling you all this mess to stop trying to stir up drama because you don't care what he does. As for the financial aspect, if you need it you need it and I'd contact child support since he is working. You already give visitation, and since he is living with his mother nothing would really change there.