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Bf's ex had one, how do I help him? S & S *20weeks* Due December 29 (boy); 16 kids; Larouche, Quebec 1123 posts
29th Apr '13

So my SO's ex-girlfriend had an abortion last year at 8 weeks. They had both agreed that they weren't ready for a baby (and the condom broke), they were fighting all the time, she had anger issues and was throwing shit at him, she didn't have a job and has no high school done, her only son has already been taken by CPS for her abusing him, etc. He is no longer with her (of course) and I was talking to him about my miscarriage. He started crying...I asked him why. He said that it fucks him up knowing that his child (the one that got aborted) got thrown away as medical waste. I held him and didn't really know what to say....he knows he did the right thing and he didn't want an abusive woman as the mother of his child. But it still hurts him, you know? I've never had an abortion so I have no idea what he's going through. Does anyone know what I can say or do to help him with his feelings and loss? Thank you.

user banned California 36390 posts
29th Apr '13

That is SO sad :( Maybr have him see a counselor?

White Chocolate Milk 1 child; Chelsea, Alabama 12303 posts
29th Apr '13

I would kind of tell him to try and find peace with knowing it was the best decision. Having a baby with a girl that is abusive, and obviously unfit to be a mother is not a good situation. It would be a hell of a lot harder to have a child that is beaten and bruised or having them forcefully removed from his care, or even end up dead at the hands of it's mother than to have never had it at all.