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Princess Celestia +1 TTC since Nov 2014; 1 child; Tallahassee, Florida 3681 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting drunk faith1:" I slept with someone once who criticized what I was doing. He told me I was doing it wrong and kept stopping ... [snip!] ... the f**k he wanted me to do. Oh, and in the end I tried getting on top, and he told me to stop. He said, "Stop. Gotta piss.""


I'd have just put my clothes on and left him to his blue balls.

michaela (: Louisiana 191 posts
May 1st '13

When I lost my virginity, the guy put it in and just...sat there. Didn't move. And the whole time he was grunting and moaning and sweating and doing awkward "dirty talk". He was like "oh yeah, your vagina likes my p***s, huh? she loves him huh?". I was just sitting there like...I snuck out of my house and risked being grounded for a week for THIS? :lol:

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
May 1st '13

The first dude I ever had sex with was a gigantic a*****e.
After we had sex the next day he was telling people
" OMFG dude she was soo ridiculously tight, it was like no one has ever been there before... f**king gross"



Uhh... yeah bro. That is what a VIRGIN is supposed to feel like lol

drunk faith1 1 child; Alabama 10081 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting michaela (::" When I lost my virginity, the guy put it in and just...sat there. Didn't move. And the whole time he ... [snip!] ... loves him huh?". I was just sitting there like...I snuck out of my house and risked being grounded for a week for THIS? :lol:"

Omg. "Your vagina likes my p***s huh?"

min. 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Industry, PA, United States 2584 posts
May 1st '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting michaela (::</b>" When I lost my virginity, the guy put it in and just...sat there. Didn't move. And the whole time he ... [snip!] ... loves him huh?". I was just sitting there like...I snuck out of my house and risked being grounded for a week for THIS? :lol:"</blockquote>



Ohhhh shiiiit!!! 'Yeahh baby and i bet my a*****e woul love your face.' Like, what a mess!!



What are these guys thinking!!!!

BrittanieY 18 kids; South Carolina 16634 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting michaela (::" When I lost my virginity, the guy put it in and just...sat there. Didn't move. And the whole time he ... [snip!] ... loves him huh?". I was just sitting there like...I snuck out of my house and risked being grounded for a week for THIS? :lol:"


Your response: I think she likes him better as friends.



*scoops up clothes and runs*

Princess Celestia +1 TTC since Nov 2014; 1 child; Tallahassee, Florida 3681 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting InkDMomma:" The first dude I ever had sex with was a gigantic a*****e. After we had sex the next day he was telling ... [snip!] ... like no one has ever been there before... f**king gross" Uhh... yeah bro. That is what a VIRGIN is supposed to feel like lol"


Uhhh... isn't that a compliment? :?



What a weirdo lol

michaela (: Louisiana 191 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting BrittanieY:" Your response: I think she likes him better as friends. *scoops up clothes and runs*"


Lmfao! :lol:

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting Princess Celestia [14]:" Uhhh... isn't that a compliment? :? What a weirdo lol"


right?! that is what EVERYONE told him hahaha
They were like uuuhhh dude?... have you ever even HAD sex before? He said it got "sooo nasty because it got wet" EW WHO THE f**k GETS WET FROM HAVING SEX?! :roll:



:D

*A&N's Mama* 2 kids; Halifax, Nova Scotia 4627 posts
May 1st '13

These stories are KILLING ME!!! Did we all f**k the same guy?!

Princess Celestia +1 TTC since Nov 2014; 1 child; Tallahassee, Florida 3681 posts
May 1st '13

I once had a guy who farted as he came. Every time.



He tried to moan really loud to cover it up but... yeaaaaaaaaah, not so smooth, guy.



At least he was a good lay, I guess.

min. 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Industry, PA, United States 2584 posts
May 1st '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting InkDMomma:</b>" right?! that is what EVERYONE told him hahaha They were like uuuhhh dude?... have you ever even HAD ... [snip!] ... ever even HAD sex before? He said it got "sooo nasty because it got wet" EW WHO THE f**k GETS WET FROM HAVING SEX?! :roll: :D"</blockquote>




Dude bro- your vagina must be broke.



Mine is always like dry ice...

MonkeyMel 1 child; Moore, Oklahoma 26202 posts
May 1st '13

I was friends with this guy for a while and we ended up living in the apartments across from each other for a bit and both of us were single. So I came on to him and we because FWB for a bit. He was a pretty small guy but not too bad. When I suggested doing doggy he said he's never done it before and thought he was too small to do it....lol..... Afterward he said that I was the best he's ever had.

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting min.:" <blockquote><b>Quoting InkDMomma:</b>" right?! that is what EVERYONE told him hahaha ... [snip!] ... WET FROM HAVING SEX?! :roll: :D"</blockquote> Dude bro- your vagina must be broke. Mine is always like dry ice..."


I must have some type of disease!!! OMFG AM I GOING TO DIE?!?!?! :shock:

user banned California 36390 posts
May 1st '13
Quoting Princess Celestia [14]:" I once had a guy who farted as he came. Every time. He tried to moan really loud to cover it up but... yeaaaaaaaaah, not so smooth, guy. At least he was a good lay, I guess."


Omg :lol: