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divorcing with an infant involved :( Meranda Faison 1 child; Panama City Beach, Florida 98 posts
3rd May '13

So me and my husband are finally divorcing. He cheated and told me he doesn't want to fix the marriage. It hurt but it was a HORRIBLE relationship. I really could care less though about that the problem is my 5month old son!!
I went and talked to an attorney and she told me ask him if he wants rights or not so I asked him and being the person he is he ignored me and next thing i know today i am the one who gets served divorce papers. Anyways he is asking for some stupid things like me paying his attorney fees and stuff but what concerns me is he wants to have my baby every other week. i am so worried about that. Im sorry but its not fair. HE cheated he broke this family apart so you want my child that i am taking care of every other week??? im so upset. I think this is all his mothers plan tho cuz she has been sending nasty messages. so the question is - IS IT LIKELY THE JUDGE WILL GRANT THAT??
I was thinking more supervised visitation. he is a liar he dropped my baby off the bed and lied about it and then my bro and cousin told me and my husband told me he lied cuz id get mad. i know people drop kids sometimes but DONT lie about my child he was hurting he was crying i had a feeling something was wrong. Also he hasn't provided me with a phone and when id ask to use his hed say no and took his phone everywhere.. well tonight i found out its because he is finding women on craigslist and trying to meet and have sex with them. I have proof. I also have proof he cheated and proof he is lying about not seeing the baby thank gosh i save everything... WILL ANY OF THIS HELP?? i don't want my child around them they are liars and very manipulative AND DISGUSTING

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 27489 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" So me and my husband are finally divorcing. He cheated and told me he doesn't want to fix the marriage. ... [snip!] ... everything... WILL ANY OF THIS HELP?? i don't want my child around them they are liars and very manipulative AND DISGUSTING"


Him cheating really won't have an effect on custody... he is there in a relationship with you, not your kid, ya know?



But if he puts your child in an unsafe situation then yes, that DOES have an impact on custody. He also should be paying your legal fees since he asked for the divorce.

Meranda Faison 1 child; Panama City Beach, Florida 98 posts
3rd May '13

so if i put the baby would b put in an unsafe situation maybe that would help???
and sorry im not trying to seem like a rude parent but he is just so irresponsible and untrustworthy.
was also wondering if itd matter that he says in the papers im keeping the baby from him which i have proof im not and so he put in their: EMERGENCY MOTION FOR TEMPORARY RELIEF. I am really hoping that seems unreasonable because num one even tho he says this stuff Jeremy hasn't bother to see my child since the first week in april or asked abt him (which is y i feel its his mom) and 2 he is and infant and he breast feeds and that's my baby... ugh all i care abt is my baby boy its a terrible situation

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
3rd May '13

Cheating and parenting don't go hand in hand when dealing with the courts and child custody. He is the father and has the same rights you do. What proof do you have that he is a bad parent?

Meranda Faison 1 child; Panama City Beach, Florida 98 posts
3rd May '13

All I have is a report from when I was pregnant n he held me down. And when my baby was 8 days he said he had a headache n so we went to church n when I got back home everything money babies things he bought was gone n he left a note saying he couldn't take it......

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 27489 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" so if i put the baby would b put in an unsafe situation maybe that would help??? and sorry im not trying ... [snip!] ... and 2 he is and infant and he breast feeds and that's my baby... ugh all i care abt is my baby boy its a terrible situation"


Honestly you sound kind of bitter. Why does he need to provide you with a phone or hand over his? I agree that the NICE thing to do would be to get you a phone... but just because you are together doesnt mean he has to give you a phone. Thats not a right. You need food, water, shelter and emergency care. That is your basic human rights. I am in no way saying thats ALL he should give you, but cell phones are a privilege.



Also, breast feeding won't make it where he doesnt have any time with the baby. A judge will give him reasonable time and tell you to pump extra or give formula.



So if he cheated, sorry... that won't have ANY effect on custody. I have had my child fall off the bed before... it happens. He should be truthful, but it happens. That doesn't make him a bad parent... hell my daughter fell off the bed NUMEROUS times. I am a stellar mother. It happens.



But honestly hun, you just kind of seem bitter. You are mad he's cheating adn that is okay... but again, it doesnt have an effect on him as a parent. You are mad he wont give you a phone... hun there are married people that still pay for their own stuff, cell phones included. Its shitty he doesnt want to see the baby but he doesnt HAVE to. Honestly, its GOOD he's not around until a custody agreement is legalized.



But if there isnt any neglect or abuse, he has a right to his kid. You guys can split parenting without being anywhere near each other. Just get in mind that he cheated, move on... you dont need that. But your son does need a father if he doesnt neglect or harm your child. And falling off of a bed is not neglect, even if he did turn around and the baby fell off after. Neglect would be putting the baby on a table top and not expecting the baby to fall off. Neglect is putting the child seat on top of the car and it rolling off. A baby rolling off of a bed? I would say it happens to 95% of us. Maybe more like 99-100% of us at least once.

I'm His Amy He's My Rory 2 kids; Caldwell, Idaho 49340 posts
3rd May '13

It's not his job to provide you a phone. He's your husband, soon to be ex, not your daddy. It's his baby just as much as yours, and stuff happens. Hell my husband smacked our son's head into a MOVING ceiling fan on high when he was 2 months old. Guess what, accidents happen.



You're blowing stuff way out of proportion and already trying to use your kid as a pawn. Kudos.

Meranda Faison 1 child; Panama City Beach, Florida 98 posts
3rd May '13

N when I was preg my doctor wanted to test him for cystic fibrosis bcuzII'm a carrier of it but he never did... n him lying abt the baby falling... that's all I can think of that might help??

I'm His Amy He's My Rory 2 kids; Caldwell, Idaho 49340 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" N when I was preg my doctor wanted to test him for cystic fibrosis bcuzII'm a carrier of it but he never did... n him lying abt the baby falling... that's all I can think of that might help??"


You really sound rather ridiculous. "He's a bad daddy and shouldn't see his kid because he wouldn't take a medical test and the baby fell off the bed!!!"

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" All I have is a report from when I was pregnant n he held me down. And when my baby was 8 days he said ... [snip!] ... n when I got back home everything money babies things he bought was gone n he left a note saying he couldn't take it......"


None of this is proof that he is unfit as a father. The report could work in your favor and they may require him to take anger management classes.

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" N when I was preg my doctor wanted to test him for cystic fibrosis bcuzII'm a carrier of it but he never did... n him lying abt the baby falling... that's all I can think of that might help??"


That will not help.

Projectpaige 4 kids; Corona, California 876 posts
3rd May '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Meranda Faison:</b>" N when I was preg my doctor wanted to test him for cystic fibrosis bcuzII'm a carrier of it but he never did... n him lying abt the baby falling... that's all I can think of that might help??"</blockquote>




These reasons will not hold up in court at all. You chose to have a baby with him so now you have to parent with him. You should not let your differences with each other affect either or your relationships with your son.

Meranda Faison 1 child; Panama City Beach, Florida 98 posts
3rd May '13

Yeh u do need a phone when u r a stay at home mom with a baby. Thats common sense I live n sunny hills in the middle of no where so something happens n then what? Green head state prison is 2 mins away. But I don't need a phone im just stating. And my husband did not even provide the BASICS. We lived with my parents n only gave them 50 $ a week. My dad took care of my stuff n my oil while he'd only give me 40 $ 0f his check as an allowance. I stayed n hoped things would get better they didn't so our lives r over. Idc there r plenty of people out there. Like I said y should I have to alternate weeks with my child for him doing this? N for yall saying I'm this n that yall don't know anything hardly abt our relationship cuz all I'm worried abt is my don being with him

I'm His Amy He's My Rory 2 kids; Caldwell, Idaho 49340 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" Yeh u do need a phone when u r a stay at home mom with a baby. Thats common sense I live n sunny hills ... [snip!] ... saying I'm this n that yall don't know anything hardly abt our relationship cuz all I'm worried abt is my don being with him"


Let me make it big and bold for you to understand.



THE BABY IS HIS CHILD TOO.


Is that clear enough? And want a phone, go get one. You got an "allowance" if a phone was that important there's plenty of cheap prepaids and ANY phone that has a charge can call 911 :idea:

♥MOBAS♥ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 7198 posts
3rd May '13
Quoting Meranda Faison:" Yeh u do need a phone when u r a stay at home mom with a baby. Thats common sense I live n sunny hills ... [snip!] ... saying I'm this n that yall don't know anything hardly abt our relationship cuz all I'm worried abt is my don being with him"


It doesn't matter what he did to YOU, get over it. HE has just as much right to his son as you do to your son. I get that you are possibly angry, hurt and resentful but don't make your son pay for it.