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The ultimate betrayal BG Secrets Arizona 4906 posts
9th May '13

I am in shock. I really don't know how to react to this. I was going through my dh's phone out of boredom last night and came across a text. It read pretty much like this:
dh- so how does this work
other person- you show up and make a reasonable donation
dh- how much is enough
other person- depends how much time you want
dh- not much. just enough to get in and get off
other person-60
dh-where are you located
other person-(location)
I confronted him right away. He freaked and ripped the phone from my hand. Then he tried to make excuses that it was probably someone from work ect. But His reaction said differently and so did the text so I pushed. He finally admitted it was a prostitute. But he denies having gone through with it. IDK if I believe him. And IDK what to do about the situation. He was angry with me the whole time I was trying to confront him and being extremely defensive. Yet said he loves me and still wants to be married. We have kids. Young kids or I probably would have clocked him in the jaw and spent the night in jail. He refused to leave when I told him he needed to get out. He doesn't act remorseful but he says he doesn't have to because he didn't go through with it. Idk if I should wait for my oldest to get out of school for the summer and leave or if I should try and work things out. IDK if I even want to. I would be less angry if he had had a one night stand and got the girl pregnant. I never thought I would have to deal with this. We have sex. Except when I was having issues with my pregnancy I don't think we have ever gone longer than a weeks without having sex and THAT is rare. I am worried I might have a std. I am worried this wasn't the only time. My mind is in a fog. I am freaking out. IDK what to do. I already suffer from sever depression that I have struggle with every day and now my self esteem is forever shot. It was already almost none existent. How horrible must I be for my husband to contact another woman for sex AND pay for it! Please I need help. IDK what to do.:(

Kylie's👣Mommy. 1 child; 1 angel baby; Texas 3462 posts
9th May '13

You're not a horrible person. He is. Don't think it's your fault because its not.



And the way your feeling is completely normal. I personally wouldn't make any decisions yet until you think it through. Your just very mad right now. I hope the best for you momma. Just don't settle and know your worth.

ღCeceღ 2 kids; Somewhere in, GA, United States 12595 posts
9th May '13

:cry: I'm so sorry hun

C'sMom! 1 child; Minnesota 1263 posts
9th May '13

RUN! Get out as soon as you can. You have no idea what he has been doing that you haven't found out about. This is horrible. Protect yourself from whatever he may bring home with him

Momma x 2 18 kids; Whiskey Dick Mountain, WA, United States 1371 posts
9th May '13

If I were in your shoes I'd drain the bank accounts and get the f**k out of there with my babies.....best of luck!!

m o m ♥ 2 kids; Ontario 7948 posts
9th May '13

When my ex used to get defensive and angry like that about issues was usually when he was guilty of it.




I would leave. Just the fact that he even thought of doing it and was arranging it would sicken me. Especially you say you have a pretty good love life. Not that it would make it right if you didn't!



And I would for sure get tested



I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

*beck-i* {JAS08} 3 kids; Prattsburgh, New York 4808 posts
9th May '13

I am soo sorry! Maybe you guys need to sit down and talk about it when things have cooled down to see why he wanted to go that route.

user banned 4 kids; Mueang Phuket, Thailand 30487 posts
9th May '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Momma x 2:</b>" If I were in your shoes I'd drain the bank accounts and get the f**k out of there with my babies.....best of luck!!"</blockquote>




I'd do the same. I'm so sorry :(

Nameless Ghoul 2 kids; Sweden 6452 posts
9th May '13
Quoting Momma x 2:" If I were in your shoes I'd drain the bank accounts and get the f**k out of there with my babies.....best of luck!!"


:!::!::!:

Always♥Faithful 2 kids; CHERRY POINT, North Carolina 21664 posts
9th May '13

I am so very sorry. Contacting a prostitute would be a deal breaker for me. I wish you the best with whatever you choose.

AA&L Due June 23; TTA since Mar 2012; 1 child; Florida 721 posts
9th May '13

First I want you to know that it's not you and you shouldn't feel horrible about yourself because of his horrid decision making skills.



For me, I don't know if that's something I could ever come to terms with enough to be with said person ever again.



I would be packing mine/my daughters stuff and leaving. I would also have a doctors appointment for the next morning to be tested for everything under the sun.

GavinsMomJohnnysWife 2 kids; Texas 2789 posts
9th May '13

I am so sorry, he should have NEVER reached out to someone else for sex let alone a prostitute. I would be getting checked ASAP. Do what is best for you and your children. It's very hard to get trust back when it has been broken like this.

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
9th May '13

Everyone is and will continue to tell you to leave. This is your relationship, your child's father. It's not that easy to cut ties like that. So, I think you need to come up with a list. Reasons to stay, reasons to leave. Have him make a list too. See where the problems lie. His infidelity is stemming from somewhere, and lack of sex at home isn't always the reason people cheat. Seek counseling. Couples counseling, and individual counseling to help you cope & see if this is something the two of you can work through. Not just for one another, but for your children, what would be best for everyone?

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
9th May '13
Quoting *beck-i* {JAS08}:" I am soo sorry! Maybe you guys need to sit down and talk about it when things have cooled down to see why he wanted to go that route. "


:!:



This is more rational than just up & leaving.

BG Secrets Arizona 4906 posts
9th May '13
Quoting m o m ♥:" When my ex used to get defensive and angry like that about issues was usually when he was guilty of it. ... [snip!] ... Not that it would make it right if you didn't! And I would for sure get tested I'm so sorry you have to go through this."


It does sicken me. I told him last night IDK if it even mattered to me or not if he actually went through with it. That the very act of contacting then was enough. But yes I really do think he went through with it but just won't admit it because I have no proof. The only reason he admitted to contacting a prostitute was because there was such solid proof and I kept pushing it.