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AbbieChrysler3312 32 kids; Ohio 1041 posts
10th May '13
Quoting I declare a Time War:" If baby is born that day I would take it as a sign that he is happy, and he is okay on the other side. ... [snip!] ... but they wouldn't want you to be so sad and dwell on the negative for so long. They would want you to heal and be happy."



Thats true, and a good way of looking at it if she does come that day..

AbbieChrysler3312 32 kids; Ohio 1041 posts
10th May '13
Quoting hobbit*:" <blockquote><b>Quoting AbbieChrysler3312:</b>" Thank you..and I cant imagine."</blockquote> ... [snip!] ... have the date in your head because its a significant date to you, It might not be a gut instinct why you're feeling like this."



I agree, but I'm the type of person that stresses out way too much about stuff and I almost feel like because I am freaking out so much about not wanting to go into labor that day that I will send myself into labor or something from all the stress... I just wish I could stop thinking about it.

user banned 21 kids; North Dakota 3800 posts
10th May '13

Some therapy may be helpful. DH's father died in a farming accident on his grandaughter's bday. MIL was always crabby, tearful, and generally a miserable person to be around at her grandaughters party. It was sad. Finally we'd all had enough of it - just because someone dies doesn't mean the living can't go on. We told her to get some therapy and it helped immensely. I realize you're hurting but life must go on...I'm sure your dad/sister would not have wanted you to mourn their passing like this. And as others have said, perhaps it's an opportunity to remember that day in a better way.

AbbieChrysler3312 32 kids; Ohio 1041 posts
10th May '13
Quoting *Mayhem*:" Some therapy may be helpful. DH's father died in a farming accident on his grandaughter's bday. MIL ... [snip!] ... to mourn their passing like this. And as others have said, perhaps it's an opportunity to remember that day in a better way."


I have been treated in therapy by multiple therapist. I think this is just one thing I won't ever deal with any better than I already am..Those two days are just difficult days and will most likely remain difficult.

I declare a Time War 1 child; Ohio 1591 posts
10th May '13
Quoting AbbieChrysler3312:" I have been treated in therapy by multiple therapist. I think this is just one thing I won't ever deal ... [snip!] ... ever deal with any better than I already am..Those two days are just difficult days and will most likely remain difficult."


I think you are stuck in the grieving process at the depression phase. And I honestly think you are holding onto your pain and not letting yourself move on. You need to let yourself heal and let go of your pain. Stop looking at the negative and focus on the positive. Your family members wouldn't want you to be so sad.

A.V.N. 1 child; 733 posts
10th May '13

I understand. I lost my dad suddenly when I was 22 wks pregnant. The anniversary of his death is not a date I would want to share with an event that is a happy one if I had a choice ( which of course no one does) but if it does happens and your sweet baby comes on that day I would bet it is a sign from your father, letting you know he is still watching over you

user banned 2 kids; Hamilton, Ontario 19220 posts
11th May '13
Quoting AbbieChrysler3312:" I have been treated in therapy by multiple therapist. I think this is just one thing I won't ever deal ... [snip!] ... ever deal with any better than I already am..Those two days are just difficult days and will most likely remain difficult."


perhaps trying to celebrate their lives on significant dates like their birthdays and or death dates will help you with those days. Try doing something that represents them. All the women in my friends family get together and bake cookies on their deceases Grandmas death date.
Theres also volunteer stuff you can do.



They wouldnt want you living like this, Im sure they loved you as much as you loved them and its breaking their hearts to see you this depressed.



Good luck hun.