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Stfu Squirrel District of Columbia 8560 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Red Bottom:" Are you being completely honest with yourself? You're insinuating you may have been raped but seem ... [snip!] ... he raped you, he needs to be in jail. If he did not rape you, you don't need to be throwing around the idea that he might have."


What the f**k are you trying to accuse this girl of?

user banned TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15320 posts
May 15th '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" Are you being completely honest with yourself? ... [snip!] ... around the idea that he might have."</blockquote> If she was raped, IMO it sounds like she's not sure who did it?"</blockquote>




There was only one guy there and she mentioned not wanting to have him in the house, but said that due to weed and alcohol, she let him in, even though she said her husband wouldn't like it.

user banned TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15320 posts
May 15th '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" That's just it. I don't know what happened. I have been raped before, and I don't have all the "normal" signs of rape. But something happened and I don't know what."</blockquote>




Have you contacted your friend?

user banned 3 kids; Los Angeles, California 54034 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting BG Secrets:" I think he will forgive me, at least I hope so. But I feel so ashamed. If it was rape then I don't know ... [snip!] ... eight years of my life being molested, raped, and abused. I thought I was over all that. I thought I was done being a victim."


Don't feel ashamed. You shouldn't have drank so much but that isn't an excuse for rape---IF thats what happened. I mean, your friend may be being honest . Did they lock the door when they left? Could he have returned after leaving her? Did you ask how the rest of their night played out?

Mama Lizzy :] 1 child; Texas 5575 posts
May 15th '13

Oh mama I am so sorry. Please go get checked out...for your and your SO's sake

K.J♥ Due November 4; 2 kids; Russellville, Kentucky 430 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Jamie & Baby Aria:" :!:"



this!! you know shes lying because you there alone is not gonna lead to you in your bed, naked for the most part, sore and bleeding. you need to tell him and def get tested.

SuperOvulator;♥ ;] TTC since Apr 2015; 2 kids; North Carolina 10017 posts
May 15th '13

I think the first thing you need to do, is to be honest with your SO and tell him everything that happened. Then go to the dr ASAP and get tested.

Turtley Mikey Due October 31; 2 kids; California 50611 posts
May 15th '13

How long were you passed out for your think? Was your SO gone the whole time?

BG Secrets Arizona 4906 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" I think he will forgive me, at least I hope ... [snip!] ... I'm confused. You say you don't remember it, but you're also afraid to relive it if it was rape?"

I am talking about all the shame afterwords. The talking to the police and the look they give you. The looks on the doctors face when they are doing the rape kit. The whole thing.

user banned 2 kids; Georgia 24891 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Dr. Paradigm Shift:" Don't feel ashamed. You shouldn't have drank so much but that isn't an excuse for rape---IF thats what ... [snip!] ... lock the door when they left? Could he have returned after leaving her? Did you ask how the rest of their night played out? "


this.
was you SO around when you woke up?

user banned 21 kids; North Dakota 3800 posts
May 15th '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" I think he will forgive me, at least I hope ... [snip!] ... I'm confused. You say you don't remember it, but you're also afraid to relive it if it was rape?"</blockquote>



I totally get this. I was raped, generally forget until a smell, sound, etc. brings me back to it. You'd be amazed what your mind does to protect itself.

user banned TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15320 posts
May 15th '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" I am talking about all the shame afterwords. The talking to the police and the look they give you. The looks on the doctors face when they are doing the rape kit. The whole thing."</blockquote>




If you don't remember anything, your best bet is to go to the hospital and see what they think happened.

MinnesotaMommy2One 1 child; Minnesota 2701 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Red Bottom:" Are you being completely honest with yourself? You're insinuating you may have been raped but seem ... [snip!] ... he raped you, he needs to be in jail. If he did not rape you, you don't need to be throwing around the idea that he might have."

I've been in a situation very similar to the OP and it just isn't that simple especially when drinking is involved. There's a lot of confusion and embarassment and shame etc involved (at least for me) and it sounds like for he as well...

BG Secrets Arizona 4906 posts
May 15th '13
Quoting Dr. Paradigm Shift:" Don't feel ashamed. You shouldn't have drank so much but that isn't an excuse for rape---IF thats what ... [snip!] ... lock the door when they left? Could he have returned after leaving her? Did you ask how the rest of their night played out? "

From what she told me after I passed out they where here for less then five minutes then went back to her place. She said she watched him drive away when he left because she knew I was passed out.

user banned 3 kids; Washington 15083 posts
May 15th '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Red Bottom:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ♫ boobook ♫:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... him in the house, but said that due to weed and alcohol, she let him in, even though she said her husband wouldn't like it."</blockquote>



She also said her friend said they both left when she was passed out on the couch.



Then she said she spent 8 yrs of her life and she thought she was done being a victim... So IMO it sounds like she thinks her SO might've done it.



But I might be reading too much into it.



OP have you asked your SO when he got home last night? Could you two have had sex and don't remember but he thought was consentual?