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New to This AvaMichelle'sMommy 1 child; Plainfield, Illinois 1396 posts
18th May '13

Me and my hubby are getting a divorce...We just didn't get along and he couldn't trust me no matter what...anyway I'm new to this whole single parenting thing. I mean I've always pretty much been on my own since he wasn't much help anyway, but any other single moms have any advice, anything...? Thanks

Sassyscorpio Due November 4; Minnesota 145 posts
18th May '13

Take one day at a time! Know that this is a life experience that will make you a stronger woman, and some day...when you're ready-you'll find a wonderful man that deserves you! I know it's an incredibly hard time, but you will get through it. It's a roller coaster of emotions, let yourself have good and bad days/moments :) I have been through hell and back-yet today I look at the situation and know for a fact I would never ever go back and change things. I'm greatful for where I am today, and I wouldn't be where I am if my ex wasn't the f**k head he was LOL! His loss!!! I'm on to bigger and better things. Things that me and my boys truly deserve in life :)

AvaMichelle'sMommy 1 child; Plainfield, Illinois 1396 posts
18th May '13

I guess I just hate the thought of being divorced. I didn't want that, but I realized I had too much respect for myself to let him treat me the way he does. I don't think I'll ever get remarried, because I just don't think I could do all that again. I know it'll get better, I just want to rush it to that point lol

Miss Brittany 1 child; Here, PA, United States 3747 posts
18th May '13

Agree with the above poster! One day at a time. It's difficult, but you can do it! One you get settled into a routine with your little one, everything will be ok. I leaned on family and friends for support when I was down. They were a life saver. Good luck!

user banned 2 kids; Iowa 7762 posts
18th May '13
Quoting AvaMichelle'sMommy:" Me and my hubby are getting a divorce...We just didn't get along and he couldn't trust me no matter what...anyway ... [snip!] ... pretty much been on my own since he wasn't much help anyway, but any other single moms have any advice, anything...? Thanks"


I'm right there with ya hun. DH and I are splitting up and he was the same way. Never trusted me and we fought a lot.

There are times where it's really gonna suck but we have to keep strong.

Sassyscorpio Due November 4; Minnesota 145 posts
18th May '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting AvaMichelle'sMommy:</b>" I guess I just hate the thought of being divorced. I didn't want that, but I realized I had too much ... [snip!] ... because I just don't think I could do all that again. I know it'll get better, I just want to rush it to that point lol"</blockquote>




I hate the thought of being divorced, and thinking of my kids having divorced parents...spending time seperately with each of us...not having a say/knowing everything that's going on when they are with him. All of those thoughts will drive a person crazy!!! It's definitely not something I wanted to go through or deal with...ugh! Remember that it's okay to have all of the thoughts and emotions that you do, it's all part of coping. In my situation my youngest was 4 months old when we split. He came to me and told me he wasn't happy and didn't know why...after asking him questions he admitted to me that he met a girl and was in love with her. They were building their relationship for a year and a half (mind you-while I was pregnant with his child!!! Ass!!!) He said he spent lots of time at her house when he said he was with friends, and that he didn't feel sorry for what he had done and couldn't say it wouldnt happen again. I was at a complete loss. My whole world felt like it was fucked. But, like I said I'm now in a great place, a year later and wouldn't go back and change it even if I could. Some days I don't know how I got through, but I did and I'm a stronger woman today than I ever thought I could be.

C'sMom! 1 child; Minnesota 1263 posts
19th May '13

I see you mentioned that not knowing part during the visitations with him. I understand how hard it is to not feel that way.
Originally, I had to keep telling myself that I'm not a perfect parent and neither is he. Neither one of us are bad parents. I had always been more the primary parent so I never had been sure what kind a parent he would be without me to be there too.
In all actuality, he is a fantastic father and our daughter adores him. In a lot of ways, getting the divorce and having him to have to be a primary parent during the visitations had made him to be a much better father than he ever probably would have been with us still being married.
Good luck with this. It can be difficult at times but I have no regrets for being on my own

AvaMichelle'sMommy 1 child; Plainfield, Illinois 1396 posts
19th May '13

Thanks ladies! I know we need this, because I'd rather my daughter have split parents then fighting parents, but it just sucks. Thanks for all the advice. One day at a time. My sister is actually in the middle of a divorce as well (he cheated on her) so I have her to talk to, but I feel like our situations are so much different as much as they seem the same. I think he'll be a good dad alone, but who knows anytime he had her while I was work he handed her over to his mom. He called me yesterday telling me he's getting himself into therapy, so I hope for his daughter's sake he does that. Ugh, one.day.at.a.time....