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Age Gap ♕Cupcαke[Queen 1 child; 1 angel baby; Rhode Island 10471 posts
29th May '13

I'm totally in no position to be having another child right now, but I can't help but think that Ella is already 3 and a half and it makes me sad that by the time I'm ready to have my next baby, she'll be at LEAST 5 or 6 and they won't be as close. It makes me kind of sad.



This is really random but does anyone else ever feel like this?

Sofie+#2 Due March 10; TTC since Jun 2014; 1 child; Sheffield, So, United Kingdom 7383 posts
29th May '13

Every Day :(

Momma Rawks 1 child; Iowa 7175 posts
29th May '13

I do.



My fiance and I were TTC baby number two, which would have made our children about three years apart. But he died unexpectedly. Now my son is four, and I don't even know if I'll have more kids. If I do, he'll probably be six or seven, at the YOUNGEST, but probably even older than that. It's upsetting--but nothing I can do about it, because I am no longer ready for a second child.

♕Cupcαke[Queen 1 child; 1 angel baby; Rhode Island 10471 posts
29th May '13
Quoting Momma Rawks:" I do. My fiance and I were TTC baby number two, which would have made our children about three years ... [snip!] ... probably even older than that. It's upsetting--but nothing I can do about it, because I am no longer ready for a second child."


Oh my gosh. That's the saddest thing I've heard in a long time.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine ever feeling ready to have another child after that but I'm sure if the right person were to come along it would feel right.

Bekkir91 Due July 28 (boy); 17 kids; United Kingdom 101 posts
29th May '13

When DS2 arrives my first born will be 4y 9m and I worry they won't be close.y mum had me and my 2 brothers within 33 months and we were inseparable till our teens. I wanted that for my boys but I'm excited to see how DS1 accepts his role as big bro

StewedAngie 1 child; 1 angel baby; Minnesota 704 posts
29th May '13
Quoting ♕Cupcαke[Queen:" I'm totally in no position to be having another child right now, but I can't help but think that Ella ... [snip!] ... 5 or 6 and they won't be as close. It makes me kind of sad. This is really random but does anyone else ever feel like this?"


Not really. My brother and I are a year and a half apart, and my sister is six years older than I am. It was really good for most of my childhood.

Brock Obama 1 child; Spain 6372 posts
29th May '13

I feel the same.
Sometimes, I just feel like having the one I have and no more kids but sometimes, I'd like another one. But I see my friends and some family members having 2 or 3 under 3 or 4 and I just think I'd go crazy. One is all I can handle for now - financially and why not, emotionally as well. My peace of mind is very important. And I'm lucky to have a such well behaved 4 y/o. She's wonderful and I'm not exaggerating. Most people tell me she is a wonderful girl. :D

MunchkinWrangler 4 kids; Rīga, Latvia 46840 posts
29th May '13

I can't say I understand how you feel, because I don't. My first two are close in age, and these youngest two will be close as well... but I hoped to give you a bit of comfort in letting you know that my oldest was almost 5 when my youngest was born and they have SUCH a good relationship. My 5 year old does everything he can to help out, and he tries to teach him new things all the time. They play very well together. I have to say it is SO much easier with the big age gap, than it was with my oldest two so close together. Both of my older kids are great helpers and since they are 4 & 5 they are more independent and I am able to give all of my kids more adequate one-on-one attention. I'd much rather have the big gap in age and I'm definitely worried about these next two being so close together again. My youngest is very clingy so I am hoping he can transition to sharing me!

SubLowe 1 child; Oceanside, California 15389 posts
29th May '13
Quoting ♕Cupcαke[Queen:" I'm totally in no position to be having another child right now, but I can't help but think that Ella ... [snip!] ... 5 or 6 and they won't be as close. It makes me kind of sad. This is really random but does anyone else ever feel like this?"


YES! my daughter is 3.5 and i wanted them closer in age. im not ready to have a second yet. soo yea sucks for Nika . i was an only child and i hated it.

Kimberly Videll Due January 5; 2 kids; California 1 posts
30th May '13

I understand your concern but I can honestly say that our son and daughter have a wonderful loving and caring relationship....and they are 12 years apart in age! :D I'm not saying that all siblings that are that many years apart would automatically have a close relationship, but besides ours I know of several familys with the same kind of situation.and I have found evidence that most of them are very devoted to each other.
Remember that there is no "rule book" to raising children...you have to do what you feel is right. Every parent out there at one time or another, has made mistakes, you learn as you go!

♕Cupcαke[Queen 1 child; 1 angel baby; Rhode Island 10471 posts
3rd Jun '13
Quoting SubLowe:" YES! my daughter is 3.5 and i wanted them closer in age. im not ready to have a second yet. soo yea sucks for Nika . i was an only child and i hated it."


I was an only child too and looking back I hate it. I used to always think "it's so sad that my child won't have any aunts or uncles"...