I posted this the other day and didnt get many responses, plus I was half asleep and forgot the most important part so here it is again.
I want to begin by letting you know that I have severe anxiety and also bipolar. I am medicated for both .
Since my son was one I have been noticing the way he does things very orderly and its only gotten stronger with age. He is three and a half and some of the many many things he does are step on a certain dot on the marble floor when heading down the steps, and telling me to step on a certain one as well. He also sits at a certain spot at dinner which i think most people do so im not worried, he has to wear his comfy pants even in 90 degree humid weather... im talkin' fleece long pants! He leaves the house crying in shorts b.c im not going to allow that thats insane... same with socks he will only wear white ankle socks a certain brand... shoes dont even get me started! He has timberlands, nike, jordan, polo ralph lauren tons and tons of shoes and only will wear a black canvas velcro shoe that was 7 dollars at walmart. They look like converse kind of, He calls them his "dirty shoes" lol! The other day i took off his shoes and socks and he had a fit! In order to make him feel better I had to put both shoes and socks back on, than take off his left shoe, than left sock, right shoe, right sock in that order. Also whe anyone puts him over the doggy gate if anyone else does it but me he screams bloody murder saying nooooo I need mommy to do it and I must come and put him back to the other side and I have to do it and put him over the gate all over again. Even if its grandma who we live with he wont allow it and it totally bothers him to a point where he cries. The other day I squirted ketchup on his plate and it wasnt where he wanted it he had a meltdown I had to clear and wash the plate and re-do it.My mom bashes me and says im spoiling him by repeating the gate ...shoe... or whatever process but I believe he cant help it and I am not spoiling him. Its so silly but these little things bother him a lot and he pays very close attention to things most people do naturally and dont even realize they're doing... I love him so much and I will definetly bring it up at his next pedi appt. Thank you for all the relpies mamas.
We 'joke' about our sons OCDness, hes done strange routine things for years, hes 3.5 now.
If you pick him up and move him he will go back to the original spot and come back.
I took a penny off the table and handed it to him to put away, he went and put it back on the table,picked it back up and then put it away. (several examples similar to this)
He freaked out about walking on sand last summer.
He freaks out about shorts, sandals (day to day things that change during the seasons).
If his dad throws in (in play) into his bed, he has to get out and get back into bed properly.
Lines up toy cars
I could go on and on. Pretty much in his world everything has a place and everything belongs somewhere specific.
When he was much smaller we realized him going out of routine really took him out of his comfort zone. Due to him being on chemo and living in a hospital for so long his first year here, his dad and I tried very hard to make sure we kept him in routine.
When we seen these actions start we thought maybe we messed him up. But now that hes 3.5, I think its just him. It what makes him secure.
But we dont feed into it. If he doesnt want to wear sandals,too bad, we tell him its too hot for running shoes, put on your sandals, if he wants to get mad and throw them,we just tell him to go pick them up.
Honestly, reading what you wrote, I think you are feeding in to your son.
I actually think it is a normal 3 yr old behavior. Ny son was the exact same way at 3. He would only wear certain textures of clothes, his shoes and socks had to be put on in a certain order. He would only wear closed toe velcro shoes. Open toe sandals terrified him. He was extremely picky about food textures and his foods could not be mixed or touch. He would line his toys up in a certain way and if you moved them he would notice. He always followed lines and cracks in the sidewalk or floor and got really upset if he had to get off.
As a mom his behavior freaked me out.
But I am happy to report that he is 4 1/2 and most of these behaviors are corrected. He loves his sandals and could care less about which shoe goes on first. He wears the textures that he used to dispise. He coukd care less about his room being organized (darn it lol). He is FINALLY getting over his food aversions.
He still likes lines but doesnt get so upset over them. And his biggest issue now is when he wears socks they have to be positioned a certain way or they "hurt".
I did kinda feel like I was spoiling him by catering to his wants but I am never looking for a battle when it comes to simple little tasks. I would rather have happy kids and reposition his socks then an upset child. I really dont see the big deal. My kids are extremely well behaved.
Just keep bein his mommy and doing whats best for him. I think he will grow out of it as he natures into a child versus a ttoddler. I think they are just finding and beginning to assert their independence!
My daughter can not have any wrinkles in any blanket or quilt. It has
to be absolutely perfectly laid out. Books in a certain size order. The socks she wears can only go up so far on her leg.
I think it's pretty normal. I mean, I like I wear certain socks and won't get into a messy bed. I think she is just picking up my habits.
Great, okay so it sounds like typical three almost four year old behavior. *phew* It had me terribly worried, and seeing as I have my own issues im keeping am extra eye out on my son hoping every day he doesnt have to deal with any of these issues. Thank you all for replies its very relieving to know that it seems to be a phase. Now I just have to put my foot down more amd break these habits and show him whos mommy lol , easier said than done. Im such a softie especially if its something easily fixed like bringing him back over the gate a second time... id rather choose my battles. It sure isnt easy to reason with a three year old, as im sure yall know.
I feel your pain completely. My son freaks out and notices everything. Everything needs to go back exactly how it was or he will pitch a fit. If I put lotion or something back and its not facing exactly how it was, sitting exactly how it was, he screams. If I get something out of the fridge from behind something and try to put it anywhere else in the fridge when putting it back, he freaks out. If I try to move anything and he sees me doing it, he screams bloody murder. And pretty much this goes on all of the time , all day, with everything, drives me pretty coocoo. But he doesn't line things up or anything, he just wants everything perfectly how it goes. If I move his room around he goes bananas. He remembers things VERY well, and knows where things go even if I think he doesn't notice it. Everything has to face a certain way, if I move it from left to right, that is a no-go. Not sure if its normal but if it is, I want no more children lol. Because it drives me insane him always throwing fits over these things.
<blockquote><b>Quoting Kaibutsu:</b>" I feel your pain completely. My son freaks out and notices everything. Everything needs to go back exactly ... [snip!] ... its normal but if it is, I want no more children lol. Because it drives me insane him always throwing fits over these things."</blockquote>
!!! This !!!
that is exactly what Cayden does. What you said about his bedroom, my son does that too he knows exactly where everything goes and came from... God forbid I throw something in the wrong basket he tells me off lol.
<blockquote><b>Quoting tumblexlove:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Kaibutsu:</b>" I feel your pain completely. My son freaks out ... [snip!] ... he knows exactly where everything goes and came from... God forbid I throw something in the wrong basket he tells me off lol."</blockquote>
Dont worry...they will outgrow that and then their rooms will be a huge mess and they wont care. Thats one I wish he wouldnt have putgrown!