Reply
_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting ♥Love♥:" Thats a good distinction. Thats what I was kind of trying to describe too. In college, thats what guys ... [snip!] ... you were next, trying to get your number or something. So I guess getting hit on is a compliment to me but cat calling is not."


Exactly. I mean, maybe I'm wrong, but to me cat calling are the strangers who yell out things at you while you walk by, who would probably not know what to say if you actually stopped. THAT to me is degrading. I usually do stop on the rare times it happens, though the obvious "f**k you" that is metaphorically tattoo'd on my forehead tends to work wonders and it rarely happens, haah.

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting she nan igans:" Again, hitting on someone is different. That's an attempt at building some sort of relationship. A cat ... [snip!] ... some repore. You are NOTHING to these men but ass and tits and they want you to know it. That's my issue. It is different."


I see the difference and I do agree with you. But most of the time I really don't care if I'm nothing but ass and tits to them. They are strangers, people that I'll never talk to or see again. If I'm an object to them, so what? Their opinion is irrelevant to me. I just walk away and forget about it. I'm sure certain cat calls would get under my skin but the example OP gave I would just laugh it off and take it as a compliment.

Mamakye_ Due October 19; 1 child; Australia 919 posts
11th Jun '13

When I was 18 and 1st yr uni I lost a lot of weight and was healthy weight for the first time since I was 12.
I had to walk 2kms along a Main Street to get to uni and I was constantly being honked at, wolf whistles, cars of boys slowing down to talk to me etc.
At first it helped my self esteem (it had been shockingly low for years!) but after about two weeks I just got sick of being objectified and treated like meat so I found a back st way to the uni, it took about 20mins longer but it was more peaceful!



Sometimes cat calling is a good thing, but mostly it's just low class and annoying!

user banned 2 kids; Georgia 24891 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting she nan igans:" I find it offensive personally. As if I'm being reduced to an object. Few of these men who are cat calling ... [snip!] ... to be flattered by that? f**k no. I would NEVER date a man who cat called at me. I think it shows a complete lack of respect."



Well said.

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting Severus Snape:" I see the difference and I do agree with you. But most of the time I really don't care if I'm nothing ... [snip!] ... sure certain cat calls would get under my skin but the example OP gave I would just laugh it off and take it as a compliment. "


I can't take being a sexual object to a man as a compliment. It just isn't in my nature.



I don't walk around stewing for hours, but I do not feel complimented by it. It's like if someone I don't know calls me a b***h. I am not going to cry about it, but it IS an insult to me. Cat calls are insulting to me, and I think the show very badly on the men who do it. It doesn't ruin my day, but it is no compliment to me.

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting Severus Snape:" I see the difference and I do agree with you. But most of the time I really don't care if I'm nothing ... [snip!] ... sure certain cat calls would get under my skin but the example OP gave I would just laugh it off and take it as a compliment. "


This is going to be a FAR stretch, but still. I feel like being complimented by it is almost like saying "hey, you were raped. Be complimented that they wanted to have sex with you!" The idea of being turned from a human to a simple object is the same, even if extent is FAR different. It's just, they think I'm hot. So? I'm not an object to be shouted at, and I'm not here to turn them on. They are objectifying me to nothing more than a set of body parts they like, and that isn't complimentary.

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting she nan igans:" I can't take being a sexual object to a man as a compliment. It just isn't in my nature. I don't walk ... [snip!] ... insulting to me, and I think the show very badly on the men who do it. It doesn't ruin my day, but it is no compliment to me."


I can understand. I'm probably just desensitized to it. I dealt with it so much when I worked that I just didn't bother me anymore. I worked in the tool department as well so I dealt with mostly judgmental men who would mention that I was hot and then ask where a man was that they could talk to. :roll: Not the best situation, but after a few months none of it bothered me anymore. I'm very glad to not be working there though lol.

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting Severus Snape:" I can understand. I'm probably just desensitized to it. I dealt with it so much when I worked that I ... [snip!] ... the best situation, but after a few months none of it bothered me anymore. I'm very glad to not be working there though lol."


OMG, lol, I dealt with that. I was a manager, and men were always asking to speak to a man.



Oh, gee, my little female brain can't work all these keys on the computer. I need a big strong p***s holder to help me.



Bastards. lol.

♥Love♥ TTC since Jun 2013; 2 angel babies; California 5928 posts
status 11th Jun '13
Quoting Severus Snape:" I can understand. I'm probably just desensitized to it. I dealt with it so much when I worked that I ... [snip!] ... the best situation, but after a few months none of it bothered me anymore. I'm very glad to not be working there though lol."

When I worked at a bank people would do that all the time, ask where the man was they could speak to. We had 5 employees at our branch. ALL women. Shit even people in our own IT department when they got frustrated with helping us with computers would ask if there was a man they could speak to :shock:

Mama Rice 34 kids; North Las Vegas, Nevada 11980 posts
11th Jun '13

My nickname at work (I was maintenance on C-130s) used to be "tits mcgee" (anchorman reference). It never offended me. But a girl at work got new fitted blues and flipped shit when some guy said the skirt fit well.



I am aware "tits mcgee" could be considered sexual harrassment or something similar but it never offended me.

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting she nan igans:" OMG, lol, I dealt with that. I was a manager, and men were always asking to speak to a man. Oh, gee, ... [snip!] ... my little female brain can't work all these keys on the computer. I need a big strong p***s holder to help me. Bastards. lol. "


I know right?! lol. No way in hell a woman could help them pick out which wrenches they needed to fix their truck lol. Our tiny women brains couldn't handle such a task. What really killed me was when I'd even have women ask me where a man was to talk to. SMH.

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting ♥Love♥:" When I worked at a bank people would do that all the time, ask where the man was they could speak to. ... [snip!] ... IT department when they got frustrated with helping us with computers would ask if there was a man they could speak to :shock:"


Seriously lol. You'd never believe how crazy and closed minded the world still is.

laurenmik 3 kids; Aurora, Colorado 7222 posts
11th Jun '13

Sigh... Homeless people are the only ones that do it to me anymore.. Lol



I don't know how I feel about it really. Maybe the people I'm around aren't vulgar, or maybe my old ugly ass ain't worth talking about anymore :)

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting Severus Snape:" I know right?! lol. No way in hell a woman could help them pick out which wrenches they needed to fix ... [snip!] ... brains couldn't handle such a task. What really killed me was when I'd even have women ask me where a man was to talk to. SMH. "


Seriously. My FIL is like that, and it KILLS me. Well, he's better now. When he first met me and I said something, he'd always tilt his head and look at me in this "she said something, isn't that cute?" way. He even patted me on the head before. Like a f**king kitten.



I think NOT. haha. I must have taught him a thing or two, because surprise surprise, he now treats me like *gasp* a HUMAN BEING

Severus Snape 2 kids; Tennessee 3550 posts
11th Jun '13
Quoting she nan igans:" Seriously. My FIL is like that, and it KILLS me. Well, he's better now. When he first met me and I said ... [snip!] ... I think NOT. haha. I must have taught him a thing or two, because surprise surprise, he now treats me like *gasp* a HUMAN BEING"


Omg that would have driven me insane. Especially as he's family now. lol. THAT stuff would have gotten under my skin. Glad things have improved though!