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ultimately who had the last word? nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

dh and I are stuck on a decision regarding our 13 months old son.



the nursery where our older son goes, offered a placement for our youngest. 2h/day up to 6 days a weeks. starting from now.



I told Dh how I thought it ll be good for him to experience things without us/outside our home. and I was going to sign him up for a 1/2days a week, then increase it as he gets older.



I really thought dh would be fine with it because like I said our oldest goes there and has been going since he was 19 months. but to my surprise he said no... he refuses to let our son being watch by anyone else but me/him or his mother until he s talking.



he s also questioning me has to why do I want the house for myself. (I d use the two hours to clean my house and rest my 30 weeks pregnant self but he doesnt see a need for it)




I usually am the one making the big decision for the kids but this time we can't seem to find a middle ground.
a

user banned California 36390 posts
14th Jun '13

If I was a SAHM, I would wait until he was talking like DH wanted

Onalee's Mummy Due August 26; 1 child; Newcastle, Australia 5355 posts
14th Jun '13

I wouldn't send my child to daycare until she was 2 if it wasn't that I was returning to work. But half a day isn't bad

nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" If I was a SAHM, I would wait until he was talking like DH wanted"</blockquote>




I am a sahm, my reasoning for doing it is simply to get him used to the idea of going there before the baby comes in 10 weeks without him feeling like I m dumping him somewhere and abandoning him because I have another baby.

hobbit* 3 kids; New Zealand 44783 posts
14th Jun '13

2 hours a day, once or twice a week is nothing. Personally I'd just do it. You're the one 30 weeks pregnant with a 13month old to take care of not him.
What does him talking have to do with anything?

nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Onalee's Mummy:</b>" I wouldn't send my child to daycare until she was 2 if it wasn't that I was returning to work. But half a day isn't bad"</blockquote>




it ll only be for two hours, so really not that long and I dont need to leave him there 6 days a week. I just want him to see what it s like, so like I said once a week, twice top

user banned California 36390 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" If I was a SAHM, I would wait until he was ... [snip!] ... the baby comes in 10 weeks without him feeling like I m dumping him somewhere and abandoning him because I have another baby."</blockquote>



Why does he have to go just because you are having a baby? I'm very confused

nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting hobbit*:</b>" 2 hours a day, once or twice a week is nothing. Personally I'd just do it. You're the one 30 weeks pregnant with a 13month old to take care of not him. What does him talking have to do with anything?"</blockquote>



he worries other kids will hurt him, and him not being able to defend himself or tell us

hobbit* 3 kids; New Zealand 44783 posts
14th Jun '13

Also my first daughter hasn't been away from me much, she is so clingy and needy she freaks if I'm not around. I'm really dreading the day she starts kindergarten in 6months, but she really needs it.
My son who went to care early because I went to uni, he was about 17months when he first went part time, he adapted to different surroundings so much easier than my daughter has. Because she's so used to me always being there. She's only 2 and a half but as she's got older Shes getting worse.

nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage ... [snip!] ... I have another baby."</blockquote> Why does he have to go just because you are having a baby? I'm very confused"</blockquote>




he doesn't have to go, I d just appreciate a two hours break to clean without two toddlers around.
and once the baby is here I m sure it ll be nice to have the same two hours to sleep and be with my newborn baby.

user banned California 36390 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting nothing ... [snip!] ... around. and once the baby is here I m sure it ll be nice to have the same two hours to sleep and be with my newborn baby."</blockquote>




I'm siding with your DH here. That would be really nice but a huge waste of money IMO and he doesn't feel comfortable with it.

hobbit* 3 kids; New Zealand 44783 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting nothing ... [snip!] ... around. and once the baby is here I m sure it ll be nice to have the same two hours to sleep and be with my newborn baby."</blockquote>



Yep and that's important too. I get it. If you think it would be good for you and your son do it.
My daughter is 2 and a half and still doesn't talk Much. There's no way she would be able to tell me if someone hurt her.

nothing to see Due August 21; 2 kids; Japan 602 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage ... [snip!] ... I'm siding with your DH here. That would be really nice but a huge waste of money IMO and he doesn't feel comfortable with it."</blockquote>




oh I forgot to add, because I m always helping the nursery out with baking/giving out toys, clothes and other things we wouldn't be paying for him until hr goes there full time.
we do pay for our older son (he also goes there two hours a day 3/4days a weeks depending on when he wants to go really)

user banned California 36390 posts
14th Jun '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting nothing to see:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Teenage Girl:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting nothing ... [snip!] ... time. we do pay for our older son (he also goes there two hours a day 3/4days a weeks depending on when he wants to go really)"</blockquote>




Even still, I would try to respect DH's.wishes. Maybe a compromise where you'll keep LO home if DH takes the LOs out for those few hours a week

Emily Thorne 2 kids; Quetzaltenango, Guatemala 26302 posts
14th Jun '13

I teach little kids... I have a kid who is 1 and a half in my classroom and he is a pain (I love him to death but he is a pain!). He cried constantly for about a month, sometimes he still does but he has gotten a little more used to the idea. He cannot speak and still is in diapers and gets knocked down by the 2 and 3 year olds (his class) when they playing.



When it's time to go he is the first one to put on his backpack and starts running for the stairs to go home, so I have to run after him and he cries that he wants to go now...



Now, I have 2 and 3 year olds who cried in the beginning as well, but they only cried for about a week, and they enjoy school very much now.



I say wait.