Since I am open and honest with my children and they know and understand a lot of what is consider "adult" things. I would straight up tell them the truth. They would understand.
I don't understand the whole censorship on things like this. Its not something I wish to lie to my kids about or make up half truth stories. Its just how my family is. Open and honesty all the way.
The baby died would be what I told them, not some bullshit half baked answer that makes me look like a tool.
They'll remember that one day & I doubt they'll look at their mom in a positive light as a result.
Just FYI, not that it matters to a lot of people, but you can't get a pre-e diagnosis in 1st trimester, like I thought. I was able to confirm with a midwife, because what I did know of pre-e & what I could find on my own really didn't gel with that & I have a pet peeve for incorrect info. It is possible, through ultrasound to detect particular things (like doppler examination of uterine blood flow), to look for indications of risk factors for later development, but even if this happens, then they treat it early in order to prevent the development of it later...but it is ONLY diagnosed in the 2nd half of pregnancy - so a woman could show elevated risk factors and especially if she had pre-e before, she is at elevated risk, but you can't have it that early on. The only reason I care to come back & clarify is that I don't care WHAT people choose to do in pregnancy options, abort, elective c-section, formula feed without any attempt to nurse, etc - I have a huge distaste for misinformation & if she is saying she was diagnosed with pre-e, she isn't being forthright. I think it is legit to be fearful of getting pre-e, it is not legit to tell people you already had it that early.
<blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" Just FYI, not that it matters to a lot of people, but you can't get a pre-e diagnosis in 1st trimester, ... [snip!] ... forthright. I think it is legit to be fearful of getting pre-e, it is not legit to tell people you already had it that early."</blockquote>
No, thank you for coming back to clarify lol. I thought it was really sketchy that she would be diagnosed, but my issue is what she told her kids. I'll talk with my friend and see if she said anything else to suggest she was lying. I kind of know her myself and she seems like a sketchy person.