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Do you have a jerk wad? Long custody rant Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
4th Jul '13

Going through a custody battle that shouldn't even be a "battle". Ex refuses to act like an adult. Caught him doing things, then when I left he backlashed accusing me of things that didn't happen. Long story. He said he would take my kids from me and wouldn't stop until he did. Blah blah blah. He has been in contempt of court by violating 7 different issues: CPO, not paying child support, not paying back tax money he like he agreed to, not paying alimony, tried to deny my right to see my kids for more than 4 hours at a time, not telling me about medical issues or appointments, not paying his bills, provoking fights in front of kids at handoffs, etc.. Just plain vile bastard.



Every time HE messes up, he threatens me with calling the sheriff and lawyers. It's gotten to the point that both attorneys are FED UP that he keeps trying to solely communicate through attorneys and he's frequently lying. Like lying as in saying I work nights so he can deny me getting my kids last night. He's lied in court about issues, down to things that are hard facts. He didn't get any time lines correct. Not even the dates he file his own paperwork. I mean WAY WAY off, but I had the dates exact. He didn't even remember his own attorneys name. He's had that same attorney for a year and a half.



He also studdered like a rambling idiot in the RO hearing; scrambled for things to say. Judge had to keep telling him "no, that's heresy. No, that's got nothing to do with why you think you need a RO".



He lied about signing a parental affidavit because he didn't want to have to pay child support on my oldest. He's tried to get a restraining order from me without a single piece of creditable evidence. It was denied immediately, but I got one. I had a thick file of police reports, letters, texts, Facebook postings, voicemails, etc..



Last Sunday he "FORGOT" he had to pick the kids up. In the custody papers it states neither of us have to wait more than 30 minutes on the other for handoffs. He didn't roll out of bed until I sent him messages saying he had until a certain time to get there or I was leaving. I had to work. I couldn't keep waiting. I left at the appropriate time. he didnt show up until 10 minutes later. he lied saying he was at work. it was sunday. Only a couple guards were on duty. it also doesnt take 40 minutes to get to there from his work. It takes 10; 15 when there is moderate traffic. I met my sitter and went to work.



He called 16 times and left 3 voicemails threatening me with legal action, said I had 5 minutes to take them to him or "else". Homestly, the deputy told him tough love and to go home. In the third voicemail he kind of shot himself in the foot. He said "hey just in case you forgot; both lawyers were there when we agreed if we couldn't meet, then babysitters would at the SCHEDULED TIME. They better bring me MY boys NOW". He said that more than an hour after the scheduled time. The schedule has been set like this since march. The schedule was set up to work with my schedule for the most part. So he knew for a fact I had to work immediately after the drop off Sunday and that he had tiger them at X time.



. I'm not going to lose another job dealing because of him. Last one was an AWESOME job with benefits. Got let go during new hire probation period because he caused so much drama at the hospital. Three employees jobs were on the line because they were playing in on it. It hey were friends of his family. I hate this small town and the people in it..



Now he's lying to the lawyers saying I have "transportation issues" so therefore, he's been allowed to alter the schedule and change My oldest sons appointments next month so that they only happen during his time with them. So I'm going to call and change one of those two. It's ridiculous. I will make appointments, then he goes behind my back and changes them. Then doesn't tell me. This is the same one that said I could have the oldest but the baby wasn't going to leave the farm.



He's also been in trouble with my oldest sons school because he was telling the underaged student aides and teachers things that were 1) not true and 2) alienated me as a parent. I was given the wrong date for my own sons preschool graduation because of that. He was telling them I "kidnapped" the kids when in reality I had them until a legal matter was resolved. He got banned from my work property for speeding off, nearly hitting a nurse in the lot. He told them I was a violent drug addict and beat him and the kids. That was proven heresy and he got in trouble for it. He also brought home a 17 yr aide from the classroom and tried to have sex with her. Not only that, but they found out recently there were 2 other girls under the age of consent in his house for the same thing from the same school. The aide's boyfriend confronted him in email and that guy turned over the email print out and additional info. Mediation and another hearing in a couple weeks. Can't wait to bury him alive.



Can't wait until this is over with. Sigh.

LumpySpacePrincess 2 kids; New Zealand 17060 posts
4th Jul '13

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.



Kinda glad my BD is just a wanker that thankfully no longer contacts me.

Mum to a Monster TTC since Jan 2014; 1 child; 5 angel babies; Colorado 11565 posts
4th Jul '13

WTF. You are making me so glad that mine (who has done that last part with the underager) doesn't give 2 shits about his child. I am so sorry that you are dealing with this shit.

Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
4th Jul '13

To make matters more.. "Fun", his whole family has been getting involved. He still lives at home! 3 ADULT sisters also live at home. b***hes I should add! They have been starting shit with two of my friends at campus/work just because they can. I'm so utterly sick of their passive aggressive bullshit!!! This isn't even the whole story. I've been posting about it because I am so frustrated

Mum to a Monster TTC since Jan 2014; 1 child; 5 angel babies; Colorado 11565 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting Gir!:" "


Sounds like my Ex-in laws....110%.

LumpySpacePrincess 2 kids; New Zealand 17060 posts
4th Jul '13

I know that feeling. BDs talking about me to everyone and thinks I don't know. His friends at my school are basically spying on me and giving him back information on me and the boys and taking it back to him.



It sucks when you know you're so better off without them but they still have to be around because of your kids.

Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting LumpySpacePrincess:</b>" I know that feeling. BDs talking about me to everyone and thinks I don't know. His friends at my school ... [snip!] ... back to him. It sucks when you know you're so better off without them but they still have to be around because of your kids."</blockquote>



I don't tell anyone anything and stay home unless I have business to take care of. I don't talk about my personal life at work beyond telling my managers what they have to know (CPO).. It really hurts to be so sheltered, but it's working. They are telling ppl I'm out in bars and doing drugs.. Awful strange because I work 2 jobs, sometimes side jobs on top of that! I take the kids to the park to play a lot or to my friends house out in the sticks. Period. The only drug I have in my system is nicotine. So they can suck eggs!! Lol spongebob reference

LumpySpacePrincess 2 kids; New Zealand 17060 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting Gir!:" <blockquote><b>Quoting LumpySpacePrincess:</b>" I know that feeling. BDs talking about ... [snip!] ... house out in the sticks. Period. The only drug I have in my system is nicotine. So they can suck eggs!! Lol spongebob reference"


Lol nice.



BD had people monitoring what I wrote on here, not even sure if they still are. Before I Was so pissed off about it. Now it's actually hilarious to think that BDs life sucks that badly, as do the lives of all his friends, that they have to hunt around stalking me online. I mean .... That's f**king pathetic.

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 27167 posts
4th Jul '13

This is why I firmly believe in "if a parent doesn't really add to a kids life, sever ties legally." I don't know what you believe, but if that was me, I'd be looking to sever legal ties.




Good lord, I feel for you and your child. :(



**hugs**



My ex did some fucked up shit and I got my child out of the situation. My ex doesn't know where we are, not that he tries to find out anyways. His family is complete bullshit anyways. He tried to kidnap my child, oh, but when Lily's great grandfather died (one of the only 2 worthy people in that family), they did list her in the obituary. With her name spelled wrong. Either they did it on purpose or they are just too f**king stupid to know any better. They really are that f**king stupid.



It does make me sad that her great grandfather passed away and I wasn't notified. But, what is done is done. Lily looks JUST like her Aunt and I can't even talk to her Aunt. Her Aunt is the only person I care about, but her Aunt os probably tainted with lies about me.



As for Lily's father, maybe he will die one day and I can piss on his grave and laugh, because the LOVELY state of Colorado thinks that he should have rights even though he tried to kidnap her... so now I can't do shit about her custody until she turns 18... can't get a passport, can't do a lot of things because his name is on her birth certificate. Long story... blaaaaaah. But her father definitely doesn't deserve any rights, so I CANT WAIT until she turns 18, and I can find her bio father that he only wishes that he raised the upstanding, intelligent child she is becoming to be. Seriously, I would probably be jailed if I said what should become of him because of what he did to her.

bean.dip 1 child; 3 angel babies; Assawoman, Virginia 1187 posts
5th Jul '13

Wow. He sounds mentally unstable...and a lot like my daughter's bio dad. He would try to make up lies about me and try to get my daughter taken away from me. It's sad that your kids are better off without their dad...but honestly, it sounds like he is only hurting them and not benefiting them in any way. I would discuss everything with your lawyer and see what kind of action you can take against him. And I am sure you are already keeping things documented, but definitely keep doing so, or start doing it, if you haven't. Hang in there!!

Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
5th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting bean.dip:</b>" Wow. He sounds mentally unstable...and a lot like my daughter's bio dad. He would try to make up lies ... [snip!] ... you are already keeping things documented, but definitely keep doing so, or start doing it, if you haven't. Hang in there!!"</blockquote>



I honestly think he is bipolar judging by the way he has acted the entire time we were together. He keeps going after young, ignorant girls who are definitely out of his league to start with. He wants this tiny young girls and s*****e's. tells them that I walked out, I'm a drug addict, I beat him up, i cheated on him, i ran off across the country with another man etc. the truth really is that he was running around with whomever he could get, contracted an std then gave it to me, blew any money he got, lied about me, told people he wanted me dead, tried to destroy my phone after i caught him, raised his fist to me many times, etc. I stayed home with the kids and tried to deal with it. I couldn't take it anymore and he was getting violent and more abusive. That's what really happened. Believe me! I wanted to kill him. I've been complaining on here for a long time about him and his family..

Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
5th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting FroggysMommy:</b>" This is why I firmly believe in "if a parent doesn't really add to a kids life, sever ties legally." ... [snip!] ... she is becoming to be. Seriously, I would probably be jailed if I said what should become of him because of what he did to her."</blockquote>



Sounds like what happened to me and my siblings. My father was a true sociopath.
To make matters worse, he often took drugs. He succeeded in kidnapping my sister who is 12 years older than me, and got away with it. Did the same thing to me 3 times. Still didn't get locked up. He was SEVERELY abusive. I remember one night my mom was working the night shift at a store. I was 4-5 at the time. I woke up and heard noises in the living room. So I walked down the hall and found my father romping with a woman on the sofa. My mother refused to believe me.



When I was 6, he dragged us all out of bed violently, ranting and raving. He took me and my older brother out on the front porch with gun in hand. He was telling us how he was going to murder is all then himself. People in the neighborhood were so used to this stuff they just kept walking/driving by. My grandmother pulled in right as he was getting ready to pull the trigger. Saved our lives. He stalked us all up until the day he died.



My ex reminds me of my father to a tee and I'm terrified for my kids. Both of them have the same demeanor. It started out the same way. My father knocked my mother up when she was a senior in high school. He's 15 years older than her! After they divorced, he married for a third time to a much younger woman again. Just repeated the process.

bean.dip 1 child; 3 angel babies; Assawoman, Virginia 1187 posts
5th Jul '13

Oh my god!!! That is terrible. What does your lawyer say about it all??

Gir! 2 kids; Ohio 7504 posts
5th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting bean.dip:</b>" Oh my god!!! That is terrible. What does your lawyer say about it all??"</blockquote>



Something along the lines of "what the f**k is wrong with him"

bean.dip 1 child; 3 angel babies; Assawoman, Virginia 1187 posts
6th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Gir!:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting bean.dip:</b>" Oh my god!!! That is terrible. What does your ... [snip!] ... What does your lawyer say about it all??"</blockquote> Something along the lines of "what the f**k is wrong with him""</blockquote>




Omg my lawyer said the same thing about my ex hahaha.