Reply
user banned 2 kids; Bellingham, Washington 1616 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" My BD actually put his hands on me by ... [snip!] ... visitation. I want them to have a relationship, but i will not risk my daughter's safety for anything. Simple as that."</blockquote>




Amen to that!!

A & T + 2♡ 2 kids; Kansas 19227 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting S*its & giggles:" <blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" My BD actually put his hands on me by ... [snip!] ... him, we just couldn't see each other and had to do exchanges through his parents."</blockquote> Wow.... just wow...."


Wow what?

A & T + 2♡ 2 kids; Kansas 19227 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" <blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" My BD actually put his hands on me by ... [snip!] ... visitation. I want them to have a relationship, but i will not risk my daughter's safety for anything. Simple as that."


You just said it's not his first threat to YOU. Has he ever threatened your daughter or her life?

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting T&A[+1]♥:" Because he has never, ever caused harm to our daughter. I'm not going to keep her father out of her ... [snip!] ... wants to be there, because he did something mean to ME. It's selfish, IMO. I bet if he took her to court, he'd get visitation."

I don't understand your logic. If a man is willing to put his hands on a woman he loves, why do you think he would spare the child?



BD abused me and I got sole custody and a restraining order. There's a high price to pay with domestic violence, and I don't feel bad - he should have made better choices. He pissed me the f**k off and I never beat him.

Sneakmom 2 kids; Texas 4861 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" My BD actually put his hands on me by pulling me down by my hair and choking me to where I could barely ... [snip!] ... he did to me and still allowed her to be with him, we just couldn't see each other and had to do exchanges through his parents."</blockquote>




Well, just because you're naive and putting your child at risk doesn't mean she has to feel comfortable with that.



Frankly, you're a f**king idiot and an enabler for justifying his actions with "sometimes there are people you just can't stand"! Regardless of how you FEEL about someone, domestic violence or violent threats are NEVER okay or justified.



OP- I'd be pissed too. That's untrustworthy of her to lie about it and sneak around.

Elle&Cole 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Rio Rancho, NM, United States 22782 posts
status 4th Jul '13

T that sucks I'm sorry.

☮Sugar Magnolia 1 child; Indiana 18298 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Yurvette [♥]:</b>" That would piss me off too!!! She shouldnt have lied and hid it from you. :/ some people man... "</blockquote>




Exactly. They're awesome to her, and i love them for that. But if they can't be 100% honest with me how can i trust.them?

gorgeouschaos712 2 kids; Hickory, North Carolina 596 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting T&A[+1]♥:" Because he has never, ever caused harm to our daughter. I'm not going to keep her father out of her ... [snip!] ... wants to be there, because he did something mean to ME. It's selfish, IMO. I bet if he took her to court, he'd get visitation."


You don't have to keep him from her. But how can you trust that he won't hurt her or that he hasn't. You do know that emotional harm can be just as bad to a child as the physical harm is to you right? Supervised visitation is always best in situations like this.

user banned 2 kids; Bellingham, Washington 1616 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" Wow what?"</blockquote>




That whole situation and your way of thinking is just fucked up. My mind is blown by your stupidity.

A & T + 2♡ 2 kids; Kansas 19227 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting Sneakmom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" My BD actually put his hands on me by ... [snip!] ... threats are NEVER okay or justified. OP- I'd be pissed too. That's untrustworthy of her to lie about it and sneak around."


I think she's blowing it wayyyyyy out of proportion. Call me any name you want, but even my lawyer said I wouldn't get full custody so I didn't fight him on it.



Like I keep saying, I bet the courts would give him visitations even with that little threat he said to HER, not their child.

A & T + 2♡ 2 kids; Kansas 19227 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting S*its & giggles:" <blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" Wow what?"</blockquote> That whole situation and your way of thinking is just fucked up. My mind is blown by your stupidity."


:D

Yurvette [♥] 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Hyrule Castle, LZ, San Marino 36521 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Yurvette [♥]:</b>" That would piss me off too!!! She ... [snip!] ... Exactly. They're awesome to her, and i love them for that. But if they can't be 100% honest with me how can i trust.them?"


You cant. Its bullshit. You have to trust the people that you aregiving your child to.

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting T&A[+1]♥:" I think she's blowing it wayyyyyy out of proportion. Call me any name you want, but even my lawyer said ... [snip!] ... Like I keep saying, I bet the courts would give him visitations even with that little threat he said to HER, not their child."

Nothing is out of proportion when it comes to violence and a child's safety.

☮Sugar Magnolia 1 child; Indiana 18298 posts
4th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting T&A[+1]♥:</b>" You just said it's not his first threat to YOU. Has he ever threatened your daughter or her life?"</blockquote>




Doesn't matter. He's mentally unstable, and has horrible anger issues. I don't trust him with her.



There have been multiple occasions where he's taken her for a couple hours and texted me and said "this kid won't stop f**king crying, come f**king pick her up now"
Which is ridiculous and obnoxious. He yells at her when she cries, she's not an exception to his anger.

A & T + 2♡ 2 kids; Kansas 19227 posts
4th Jul '13
Quoting Rd.tko.:" Nothing is out of proportion when it comes to violence and a child's safety."


alright.