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Ronnie RadKat 4 kids; Arizona 22060 posts
status 24th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Yurvette [♥]:</b>" Yeah they can. Its called loopholes. She is due in 3 months. She is RUNNING OUT OF TIME to work with a agency to pick a family and get to know them. "</blockquote>




If they know the father is known and mom is in contact with him then they will need consent. There was no loophole in your case, as you said eventually your ex consented before the adoption took place.
What happens when he comes back and says he wants the child? This happened to a couple I know, although it was only mom who lied and said she didnt know who the dad was. mom surrendered at the hospital so there was no agency but CPS. They placed the child, she was adopted. Dad came into the picture eithin the statute of limitations ( 6 months here)and fought it, child was given back to the bio dad. This happened yo a couple I was in foster certification training with, the child was almost a year when they gave her back to bio dad.

Ronnie RadKat 4 kids; Arizona 22060 posts
status 24th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting 1inpink2inblue:</b>" Like I said before you don't have to be a mom. You can hand him the kid and walk away. the best they ... [snip!] ... but I would say that is the least of your worries. If he really wants this baby then tell him that is how it is going to be. "</blockquote>




I agree, this is your best bet.

Red Bottom 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15275 posts
24th Jul '13
Quoting Ludwig Von Koopa:" i used to think that way. but now...i see that keeping this baby wont do shit for us. its just gonna ... [snip!] ... wanna control me he wants to leave me. but in reality if im choosing to stay with him, he has me wrapped around his finger..."



You do realize this is the behavior of someone in an abusive relationship....



you're addicted to him.



This relationship will not work out, whether you keep this baby or not.

Ludwig Von Koopa Due October 6 (boy); 1 child; Los Angeles, California 299 posts
25th Jul '13

i know...so right now im trying to figure what the hell to do with this baby so i can peacefully leave...

Red Bottom 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15275 posts
25th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ludwig Von Koopa:</b>" i know...so right now im trying to figure what the hell to do with this baby so i can peacefully leave..."</blockquote>




Leave first. He's crazy so it won't be easy or peaceful. But it'll be worth it. Then contact the agency.

Ludwig Von Koopa Due October 6 (boy); 1 child; Los Angeles, California 299 posts
25th Jul '13
Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Ludwig Von Koopa:</b>" i know...so right now im trying to figure ... [snip!] ... Leave first. He's crazy so it won't be easy or peaceful. But it'll be worth it. Then contact the agency."


how is he crazy? im the one thats crazy...right?

Red Bottom 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15275 posts
25th Jul '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ludwig Von Koopa:</b>" how is he crazy? im the one thats crazy...right?"</blockquote>




What?

Mrs.Mud 6 kids; 2 angel babies; North Dakota 3308 posts
25th Jul '13
Quoting Ludwig Von Koopa:" how is he crazy? im the one thats crazy...right?"


You're not crazy. You have feelings that many of us, as mothers, do not understand. But you are open and honest and trying to do best by your baby, and for that I applaud you. No way in hell would I sign my child over to a man with gang affiliations. Leave town, do the safe surrender in another city. If you feel that you're in danger, contact the police.