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If you believe everything happens for a reason, Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
5th Aug '13

what is the reasoning behind terrible things that happen? War? Murder? Rape? Starving, abused children?

castaway 2 kids; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 19254 posts
status 5th Aug '13

This particular question is one reason why I find that statement nauseating.

Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
5th Aug '13
Quoting castaway:" This particular question is one reason why I find that statement nauseating."


Same.



But I see it said SO often.

Elle&Cole 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Rio Rancho, NM, United States 23771 posts
status 5th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting castaway:</b>" This particular question is one reason why I find that statement nauseating."</blockquote>




Pretty much what I was going to say...
I've had some pretty shitty things happen in my past and although I wouldn't say everything happens for a reason...I like I believe they happened in order to make me the person I am today

Simply, Mom 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Upland, 11735 posts
5th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting castaway:</b>" This particular question is one reason why I find that statement nauseating."</blockquote>




!!

Cαtwomαn 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Gotham, DC, United States 12914 posts
5th Aug '13

I heard that almost everyday for a year after i lost my daughter. I'll never understand it. It used to really upset me.

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
5th Aug '13

I think the idea is that good comes from everything, even bad. People grow, they learn, and bad things make them stronger. Likewise, you have to remember that in most of the faiths where this is the case, there is Heaven after death, so the good people who die will likely end up in a better place making it not such a bad thing.



It's like, the idea that bad things happen to make room for good things later.



I'm not saying I believe it, but that is the idea.

7 blessings so far.... Due February 3; 6 kids; Glen Burnie, Maryland 8799 posts
5th Aug '13

I do believe that everything happens for a reason..... doesn't mean its a ''good'' reason . Some things happen to teach us a lesson or to make us stronger, other things are consequenses for certain actions(our own & those around us), the ''bad things'' (rape, murder, torture, etc) are simply because there is evil in this world




9

Squid Kid Unavailable, NA, United States 32450 posts
5th Aug '13

I feel like if something is meant to happen, it's going to happen one way or another, regardless, it just might happen in a different way.



But I don't know. I'm just an ordinary person. I'll never have answers to these questions and I'll never pretend to. It's a coping mechanism.



Yeah, it's hard to see things that way, after losing 5 pregnancies that they happened for a reason, it's hard not to be mad at the universe. But I've been there. When I was a kid and living in an abusive home and I turned to the "Why do these things happen?" and I was very bitter, very violent. Very suicidal. When I turned to try to find a silver lining resulting from tragedy, I was able to live a more enlightened life, rather than dwell in the bitterness.

user banned Due October 22 (boy); 17 kids; Dildo, 4998 posts
5th Aug '13

I always wonder if terrible things happen because maybe you were a terrible person in a previous life. It's just a thought, and not one that's entirely well thought out even. I believe in Karma though, and that everything you do comes back to you threefold... Sort of like the time I cheated on an ex ONCE and my next boyfriend slept with a new girl every night for like eight months haha. I believe everything you do comes back to you and just hits you three times harder. In essence, it's nice to believe everything happens for a reason when you're going through something tough. You got dumped because a new, better person will come along, your parents are getting a divorce because new better people will come along for them and you'll all be happy, your dog died because you were old enough to understand the concept of death and it's an important life lesson, etc. but some things really just can't be explained

castaway 2 kids; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 19254 posts
status 5th Aug '13

I find the antithesis of that statement to be comforting.



you didn't cause bad things to happen to you cosmically any more than Jesus found your keys for you this morning. Life can be painful and feel bad, but that doesn't mean it's a punishment. Things happen.



When my dad was dying from ALS and my 'faithful' (ex)husband was cheating on me while trying to one-up me in careers, I would have felt pretty shitty to think that I caused all of that. I didn't. It made me tougher, but that is a part of life. Bad things happen to everyone. We all decide on our own how to handle them, to learn from them, or to be bitter and blame the world, it's all a choice.

user banned 2 kids; Silly, Belgium 6539 posts
6th Aug '13

I believe everything happens for a reason, but not necessarily a reason that we can understand or comprehend.



I also don't tell people that everything happens for a reason, because it makes me sound like an asshole and not everyone wants to hear that shit when tragedy has struck. You can't find the silver lining in everything, but I believe it's there whether we know it or not.

Lucid Dreamer Florida 3829 posts
6th Aug '13

I believe before we are born we choose our missions and some things will have to happen good or bad to accomplish that. Also things happens because of free will which we can use for good or bad purposes. It is all a part knowing the self through experiences but despite the bad things that sometimes happens it is only temporary and the true self can never be harmed or damaged because it is a part of the creator we refer to as God and our true state is Love.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
7th Aug '13
Quoting Odafin Tutuola:" I believe everything happens for a reason, but not necessarily a reason that we can understand or comprehend. ... [snip!] ... when tragedy has struck. You can't find the silver lining in everything, but I believe it's there whether we know it or not. "


Mostly this AND I believe "Of course there IS always a reason...duh? Obvious much?" because there IS always a reason, even if it's a shitty one & even if we can't figure out what caused it, there is always a cause. The Tsunami happened in Sri Lanka because of an EARTHQUAKE...it had a reason. Even the earthquake had a reason....tectonic plates & all that jazz. It doesn't make it rosy.



I like this type of statement almost as much as I like things like people telling me on my umpteenth miscarriage that "something must have been wrong". For a short period I turned quite bitchy because I had heard farrr too many stupid things said & started saying things like "OMG! THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH. Here I was thinking all this time that babies die in your womb when everything is PERFECT! Well shit. I'll have to talk to the Dr's about that one...maybe something WAS wrong. What a thought!" I know no one was TRYING to be mean, but fuck man, you can only hear that and "thank goodness it was sooner than later, thank god it happened now before it was a 'real baby', the baby probably had a birth defect & nature knows what is best, you just need to pray on it, God has a plan, if you just relax & let it happen it will work out & all those other bullshit placates for so long before you just want to cunt punt someone. How about "I am so sorry, if you need to talk, I am here, or just shut up? Why is THAT so hard for people?

The Master 2 kids; Perth, Australia 19989 posts
7th Aug '13

human nature. There will always be wars and with wars comes famine. The same goes for rape .... unfortunately human nature is what it is.