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Cast Your Vote:

    • never ever. i'd burn off their genitals first! -- Votes: 64
    • really? that's an option? -- Votes: 29
    • perhaps, i don't know yet - i don't have a teenager -- Votes: 84
    • i've already stocked condoms & plan b in their nightstand -- Votes: 19
    • sex is for bonobos & porn stars, of which my teenager is neither -- Votes: 6
Mara Due September 27 (girl); 2 kids; San Francisco, California 38964 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting homes cool:" No. I'll discuss birth control, safe sex, etc. But I would find it very disrespectful for my teenage ... [snip!] ... my teenage children to be having sex in my home. I cannot control what they do, but I can set boundaries and make those clear. "


so you'd put them on birth control and expect them to have "safe sex" elsewhere?

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10437 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting Mara:" i feel like the potential for that - if the entire thing is preceded by a parental meeting about sex, ... [snip!] ... them know, of course, that penetration doesn't have to happen unless both parties are fully willing to take that step / risk. "


I see what you're saying! But I just wouldn't feel comfortable with my daughters boyfriend sleeping over.. I just don't find it appropriate.

Two Princesses 2 kids; Long Beach, CA, United States 7203 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting I♥RYLEIGH:" Yeah I guess so. but I'm not gonna walk into my 14 (saying 14 bc I lost my virginity at 14......) year ... [snip!] ... and say SORRY! and walk back out. No best believe I am picking him up by his penis and throwing him outside, ass naked. lol"


I also agree with this. While I would like my girls to practice safe sex when they do become sexually active, I also better not walk on it either. I believe in knocking, and if you can't not be humping by the time I get in there there's gonna be a real problem lol.

homes cool TTC since May 2014; 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 61358 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting Mara:" so you'd put them on birth control and expect them to have "safe sex" elsewhere? "


Eh, no. I don't know. It's hard to think that far in the future. I do know that sex in my home isn't going to be okay with us. It wasn't okay with my parents, or DH's parents growing up, and we had full respect for their rules.



Personally, I hope they follow in our footsteps and wait until marriage. That is what we will teach them. It is up to them to take that path, but I sure hope they do.

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10437 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting Two Princesses:" I also agree with this. While I would like my girls to practice safe sex when they do become sexually ... [snip!] ... either. I believe in knocking, and if you can't not be humping by the time I get in there there's gonna be a real problem lol."


LOL definitely. It's just how I was raised. I'm not gonna be like yeah okay my baby girl is upstairs having sex in her room I'm just gonna continue washing my dishes..... awwwwwwwkward.

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10437 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting Spacetits:" I would let them have sleep overs starting at 16."


In the same bed?

Oncemore Suq Madiq, SH, Turkey 1588 posts
12th Aug '13

I wish I could find the video of an actual tribe or culture that practices this. They build actual huts for the teens to have "alone time".



Im sure there are some great pros and some cons.



However if this decision came down to my parents, they would rub scotch bonnet pepper on my vag and tell me thats exactly what sex feels like. My children wouldn't even have the gall to ask.

Hotpocket Due September 27; 1 child; 2 angel babies; Birmingham, Alabama 985 posts
12th Aug '13

My parents allowed my now husband to spend the night with me but he is the only boy they ever allowed. And we were both 18. I cant see doing it with just any boyfriend at any age less than 18. It never bothered us that my parents were in the house or that they probably knew. We were just excited to be in bed together. lol. Though we were COMPLETELY safe.

Mrs.Mud 6 kids; 2 angel babies; North Dakota 3314 posts
12th Aug '13

No. I plan on being open and honest with my boys, but giving them permission to have sex under my roof? With their younger siblings around? No way. Ideally, I will be able to give them enough information, and they'll have enough self-control and respect for the young girls around them, that they'll choose to wait until adulthood.

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10437 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting homes cool:" Eh, no. I don't know. It's hard to think that far in the future. I do know that sex in my home isn't ... [snip!] ... and wait until marriage. That is what we will teach them. It is up to them to take that path, but I sure hope they do."


Shit it wasn't ok with my parents and I got pregnant at 14, 16 and 17 lol :(



I hope DD does this as well but I doubt it... not in this day and age. It's unfortunate.

user banned Due September 14 (boy); 1 child; Rhode Island 6726 posts
12th Aug '13

I agree with Mara. My mom let my boyfriend sleepover but set boundaries and I never had a pregnancy scare or anything like that. I didn't get pregnant until me and my boyfriend had been living in our own apartment for well over a year.

I♥RYLEIGH 49 kids; Windsor, Ontario 10437 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting Spacetits:" Well, I don't have any spare beds. Just because they share a bed doesn't mean they're having sex. I ... [snip!] ... they're having sex. I don't have sex with my husband every night, and I sure as hell didn't when he was living with me at 16."


Ahhhhhhh. I guess I was bad then...

Bawse Litchfield, NY, United States 70858 posts
status 12th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Squeaky McGee:</b>" It's not really something I like to think about, since my girls are 3.5 years and 3 weeks. But I know ... [snip!] ... any trouble, fortunately, but I'd much rather respect my girls and have them respect me in return. That's all I have for now."</blockquote>




I mostly want to say this. I wasn't allowed to date. At all. I never went on a date until I moved out of my parents' house. .. and I basically got kicked out for having sex. That is NOT how I want to do it. I mean. ..I don't think I want to open my house up to boys and tell them to feel free, but I'm also not dumb and I realize that the probability of my girls having sex while under my roof is higher than not. I would rather them be well informed and well protected as I was not

Momma R 2 kids; Washington 3631 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting I♥RYLEIGH:" Yeah I guess so. but I'm not gonna walk into my 14 (saying 14 bc I lost my virginity at 14......) year ... [snip!] ... and say SORRY! and walk back out. No best believe I am picking him up by his penis and throwing him outside, ass naked. lol"


:!::!::D:D

Mara Due September 27 (girl); 2 kids; San Francisco, California 38964 posts
12th Aug '13
Quoting I♥RYLEIGH:" Is there an age that you'd be ok with? Like would it differ if it was your 14 year old as opposed to your 19 year old?"


tricky question to answer but i'll give this a shot



... honestly, i'm going to be gauging where my kids are in terms of their sexuality and interest in it as soon as puberty hits.



if one of them develops a serious relationship, i'm going to be watching it like a hawk and if they're gunning for it, i'm going to decide whether they seem ready.



i doubt any 14 year old is truly ready, though. 18? sure... it's highly likely.



so there's going to be those four years in between where it's going to be about who their bf/gf is and making sure that my kids are clear on the huge amount of personal responsibility sexual intercourse carries.



for the most part, i think i'll be promoting alternatives to penile-vaginal penetration, b/c that's the baby-makin' game, which is very serious and needs to be seen that way by them.



it's not so much about a numerical age (although i reckon before 16 i'm going to be patently uncomfortable w/ them claiming they're "ready") as it is about the behaviors both parties demonstrate as teenagers.



if they're having issues in school for example, and getting in trouble or being irresponsible in other ways, the foregone conclusion will be that they're not ready for the serious responsibility of sex.



but then we're back at pushing them to do it secretly and less safely elsewhere.



hmmm... it's a tricky dance, this parental responsibility for teenage sexuality!