Reply
Deleted. Chelsey Lee 1 child; New York 441 posts
13th Aug '13

Found my answer, thanks for the advice from those who were supportive and helpful I appreciate it.

Redneck Mamma North Carolina 8746 posts
13th Aug '13

I don't see how anyone can get out of paying child support unless he lies. He sounds like a douche bag and I am sorry you are having to go through all that. I hope you get everything you want and his checks are garnished so you can get your child support.

Phallus Cranium clusterfuck, LA, Sri Lanka 107867 posts
status 13th Aug '13
Quoting Chelsey Lee:" I am in NYS for starters. My son is 6.5 months old. I just filed for custody and child support. I have ... [snip!] ... me what I want and he said he wont let me be happy. I am so worried about my sons safety with his dad and dads side of family."

Is there anything in writing about his past physical altercations?

Mama2(three)Boys ♥ 3 kids; New Jersey 9119 posts
status 13th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting redneck mamma:</b>" I don't see how anyone can get out of paying child support unless he lies. He sounds like a douche bag ... [snip!] ... to go through all that. I hope you get everything you want and his checks are garnished so you can get your child support. "</blockquote>




This. Sorry you're going through that.

Oncemore Suq Madiq, SH, Turkey 1587 posts
13th Aug '13

Much of what you said would be he said she said, if none of it is documented. Also if he can prove that he has been supporting the child more than you have, you may not get it. NYS is crazy. They will ask him to fill out a financial form, saying what he makes, what his expenses has been so far for the baby and he has to show it.

user banned 2 kids; Medina, New York 1612 posts
13th Aug '13

Do you plan on getting a lawyer? what county are you in?

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14109 posts
13th Aug '13

Unless they have a legitimate reason backed up by proof that he would mistreat the baby, he's at least going to have partial custody. If his job is legal, they'll give him a set amount of child support.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46094 posts
13th Aug '13

1. Get a lawyer.
2. Gather any evidence you have of his past physical violence towards YOU (not random fights at school when he was 15 or whatever).
3. Resign yourself to the fact if you do get supervised visitation, it won't be forever unless he screws up big time.

Red Bottom TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15312 posts
13th Aug '13

You need a lawyer if he's getting one.



I hope that you charged him when he was physically abusive. Without any evidence that's going to be hearsay.



He's going to have to pay child support unless you get 50/50 custody and visitation.



I would suggest getting a job now that you're a single mother. It will show you taking initiative to provide for your child. And you're frankly just going to need to get one because there's no other income. Unemployment isn't designed to allow single moms to stay home at their will.

Chelsey Lee 1 child; New York 441 posts
13th Aug '13

.......................

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46094 posts
13th Aug '13
Quoting Chelsey Lee:" Only evidence I have is a journal I kept from when I was pregnant. Like a diary. With how he treated ... [snip!] ... 2 times a week for her mental issues, its just a bad bad scenario and I just want to prevent the harm before its too late."


The diary won't hold up in court.



The buckling the child in the seat thing confuses me, if you were there, why did you buckle him in? Same with the formula, why didn't you go buy some?



The receipt thing doesn't make any sense at all. Why would the courts care?



Also, the thing with his ex doesn't make a difference either.

Red Bottom TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15312 posts
13th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Chelsey Lee:</b>" Only evidence I have is a journal I kept from when I was pregnant. Like a diary. With how he treated ... [snip!] ... 2 times a week for her mental issues, its just a bad bad scenario and I just want to prevent the harm before its too late."</blockquote>




Okay. Well leave the drama out of the courtroom or no ones going to give a shit what you say.



You can try to use the diary but that's still hearsay. You can bring up the report the police made, but if its going to make you look bad too, I wouldn't. The recording might help you.

Red Bottom TTC since Apr 2014; 2 kids; Middelfart, Denmark 15312 posts
13th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" The diary won't hold up in court. The buckling the child in the seat thing confuses me, if you were ... [snip!] ... thing doesn't make any sense at all. Why would the courts care? Also, the thing with his ex doesn't make a difference either."</blockquote>




This is starting to sound like a bunch of dramatic bullshit.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46094 posts
13th Aug '13
Quoting Red Bottom:" <blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" The diary won't hold up in court. The ... [snip!] ... his ex doesn't make a difference either."</blockquote> This is starting to sound like a bunch of dramatic bullshit."


I agree completely. This sounds like a huge mess.



I'm really confused by some of her reasoning behind wanting supervised visits. It was one little line about him wanting the baby to CIO, and several lines about the ex girlfriend.

Bethanys mommy Due October 31 (boy); Japan 24 posts
13th Aug '13

why would you have a kide by this man ..drama drama this didn't just start after the baby you sound like you need some mental help