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Im lost... Vent. Aria's Mommy&Daddy Due December 18 (boy); 1 child; Mesa, Arizona 806 posts
17th Aug '13

Bd & I split for 8 months. N that time he dated an ex. That he had strong feelings for in the past. Well they got stronger while they were together supposivly. He says its had being with her because of who she is. He doesnt really even know her. She lies aout everything. But we grew apart in that time. Well now im pregnant & we arent sure if hes the father or an ex friend (itv was a one time thing) But my dates say its Bds. & he said he wants to be the father no matter what.( the other guy isnt here for me at all) We are living together bcuz i have no where else to go at the moment. But he told me as of right now he doesnt want to be with me. He wants to be with her at the end of everything. But said he doesnt know whats going to happen bcuz he still loves me. Just isnt in love with me. We are young & hae alot of growing up to do b4 wwe can work out in a relationship. But hes off hanging out with her. Left in the middle of the night. & isnt back yet.. Its really hard but 8im trying to be understanding of everything. I feel like if i work on myself & fix some things we will be together in the end. & i know part of him thats what he really wants. Im just so sad & upset though. I went to the hospital yesterday bcuz i was having an anxiety attack. Idk im going to be patient but im so sad about everything.. I love him so much.

penispenispenisVAGINA 4 kids; Idaho 7116 posts
17th Aug '13

He wants to be the father of your baby no matter what but doesn't want to be with you? You deserve better. You nee to find some where else to go and move out and get on with your life.

MahmuhMahmuh 3 kids; Wichita, Kansas 6706 posts
17th Aug '13

You need to get on your own feet and get out of that situation, have the baby, get a DNA test and accept that he cares about you and your child(ren) but doesn't want to be with you. You have bigger problems than him not wanting a relationship.

Jessi♥ TTC since Aug 2009; 17 kids; Carlisle, Pennsylvania 185 posts
17th Aug '13

Actually, I think it's a good sign that he wants to step up and be the father if he in fact is...even if he doesn't want to be with you, it's best for the child to have both parents if it ends up that way. But it sounds like you deserve better than someone pulling that "I love you but want to be with her" crap. He's made it clear who he wants to end up with...no amount of working on yourself or kissing his ass will change that, nor should it. You should only work on yourself for you and your kids...no one else warrants you changing/bettering/etc. when you're not even together!

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14181 posts
17th Aug '13

Tell him he is welcome to be there for his child but you don't want to hear about any of his feelings unless he gets rid of the other girl. You don't need to let yourself be played just because you're having a baby.

Sammiewhammy 5 kids; Tracy, CA, United States 519 posts
status 17th Aug '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jessi♥:</b>" Actually, I think it's a good sign that he wants to step up and be the father if he in fact is...even ... [snip!] ... only work on yourself for you and your kids...no one else warrants you changing/bettering/etc. when you're not even together! "</blockquote>



This was summed up SOOO perfectly! Couldn't have said it better :)
I'm sorry you're going through all this, especially being pregnant. But you need and deserve to be happy, and he's the source of the majority of your sadness :(