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i feel stupid Oya. 81 kids; Hollywood, Florida 25195 posts
8th Sep

I've been feeling so.... dead today. M my SO knows something is up but he isn't sure what.we had this huge stupid argument but to me it wasn't stupid. I feel like he wants me to be someone I'm not.... he wants he to "want more" so he can have motivation to give new more.he tells me I'm simple minded for wanting to just be happy and to just love. I'm not a flashy person I don't like allot of jewellery or clothes or shoes.... but he wants me to be a little more mindful of those things. Anyways I feel stupid for just giving in and saying yes I'd change and pay more attention and try not to be so content in simplicity. But I feel so fake and I feel so lonely....like I always have to be a f**king drama queen to please him. Idk what to do. I really just want the fighting to stop and we go back to happiness

loser mom 2 kids; 1 angel baby; GoShox!, KS, United States 9199 posts
8th Sep

You can only be yourself.



If he wants to give you more... tell him there's a house to clean and laundry to fold. :)

Oya. 81 kids; Hollywood, Florida 25195 posts
8th Sep
Quoting loser mom:" You can only be yourself. If he wants to give you more... tell him there's a house to clean and laundry to fold. :) "


I'm trying. It's hard to even pretend to be happy anymore and I hate arguing so when he starts going in I just agree so he s huts up

J+K= Bri&Colton:) 2 kids; Windsor, PA, United States 8479 posts
8th Sep

Ask him what did he fall in love with if you were always that way? If he loved your simple style in the beginning, why ask you to change now? I could understand if you are dressing in a way that would put off employers and job opportunities but if it's just that you don't enjoy flashy clothes and jewelry then I don't see his problem?

Oya. 81 kids; Hollywood, Florida 25195 posts
8th Sep
Quoting J+K= Bri+ Colton:):" Ask him what did he fall in love with if you were always that way? If he loved your simple style in the ... [snip!] ... employers and job opportunities but if it's just that you don't enjoy flashy clothes and jewelry then I don't see his problem?"


We spoke about it and basically he thinks that women who are more into material things are always striving to get ahead. And because I'm not it makes him upset that I don't want the best for myself.the problem is what I consider the best and what he considers the best is completely different!!!! I like expensive too just simple and classic and elegant. He likes things that show off the amount of wealth he had and he wants me to be q reflection of that.... Idon't know if I know how to

user banned Due January 20; 33 kids; North Carolina 14662 posts
8th Sep
Quoting Oya.:" We spoke about it and basically he thinks that women who are more into material things are always striving ... [snip!] ... things that show off the amount of wealth he had and he wants me to be q reflection of that.... Idon't know if I know how to"


Sounds like he would rather have a trophy than a girlfriend.
I don't like material things. It's basically saying "pay attention to me! I'm shiny!" I'm more simple. I like to have the memories, because there are stories behind them.
If DH did that with possessions, I'd feel like he was trying to buy me, not enjoy me

J+K= Bri&Colton:) 2 kids; Windsor, PA, United States 8479 posts
8th Sep

<blockquote><b>Quoting Oya.:</b>" We spoke about it and basically he thinks that women who are more into material things are always striving ... [snip!] ... things that show off the amount of wealth he had and he wants me to be q reflection of that.... Idon't know if I know how to"</blockquote>




Well that's very shallow and not true. I know people who are very lazy and have no career and wear flashy things trying to portray to others something their not, your clothes brands shouldn't define you. I have two bachelor's degrees and Masters degree and I work at home making very good money and I never wear expensive jewelry (except for my wedding rings) and I have very few expensive articles of clothing.

Oya. 81 kids; Hollywood, Florida 25195 posts
9th Sep
Quoting Pirate Hooker {BAMW}:" Sounds like he would rather have a trophy than a girlfriend. I don't like material things. It's basically ... [snip!] ... because there are stories behind them. If DH did that with possessions, I'd feel like he was trying to buy me, not enjoy me"


honestly thats how it makes me feel. like he would rather have a girl he can show off about then a woman that he can respect and enjoy. I am just exhausted so I have given up. its not a big enough arguement for me to want to battle about it, so I just gave up

LayLu 17 kids; Virginia 4007 posts
10th Sep

He should love you for who you are.