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Ravey Candyass 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Boston, Massachusetts 103331 posts
9th Sep '13

i really can't even take this seriously. i read that like you're trying to write a short story.

~Veritas Aequitas~ 3 kids; Sierra Vista, Arizona 3198 posts
9th Sep '13
Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" She wasn't talking about names. You're husband reaction to it was very over reacting. "


I agree he did, and he apologized. But he walked away my issue is her saying it in the first place then going after him. We had a long weekend just found out our family vehicle is out of commission until we can save up $2000, he had to fix three of their family computers because of their carelessness. He was already worn and she knew that, we had all talked about the stresses of this week earlier that day.



She even baited me later on, I just have a much tighter reign on my temper.
But she couldn't even look me in the eye while I was there, IMO that's guilt that she cannot fess up that she was wrong too.

Bobby Shazam fornication, ri, Wallis and Futuna 105551 posts
status 9th Sep '13
Quoting ~Veritas Aequitas~:" I agree he did, and he apologized. But he walked away my issue is her saying it in the first place then ... [snip!] ... But she couldn't even look me in the eye while I was there, IMO that's guilt that she cannot fess up that she was wrong too."


I think you're making into a bigger deal than it is.

~Veritas Aequitas~ 3 kids; Sierra Vista, Arizona 3198 posts
9th Sep '13
Quoting castaway:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ~Veritas Aequitas~:</b>" He did apologize as soon as he came ... [snip!] ... i absolutely have to, then I'm nice but take her crap with a grain of salt and thank my lucky stars that I don't live her life."


Oh he's still recovering from his problem but he's done so amazing that I will never begrudge him. He is a product of the environment he grew up with, he was bullied by his own family for so long and strove for so long to make them proud for doing everything for them.
My family just moved back so we will definitely be spending more time with them!
They're not worth the drama and heartache, I just feel sorry for my eldest and my FIL they both don't deserve this.

~Veritas Aequitas~ 3 kids; Sierra Vista, Arizona 3198 posts
9th Sep '13
Quoting Ravey Candyass:" i really can't even take this seriously. i read that like you're trying to write a short story."

lol I just reread it and it just sound like a short story...
was unsure that my SIL was going to call the cops for his yelling, she's done that to his other sister a year or so ago so I initially did that on my cell as a possible statement.

~Veritas Aequitas~ 3 kids; Sierra Vista, Arizona 3198 posts
9th Sep '13
Quoting .Colleen.:" I think you're making into a bigger deal than it is."


Maybe, it just felt like she was baiting me at the dinner table making crude comments about my husband.



Mainly just upset that she first cursed in front of my children, then went after him, talked bad about him out back with our eldest out there instead of sending him back inside. When my husband reacted the children were already ushered outside by my FIL due to her "f**k off" comment.

user banned 1 child; :), :), United States 5380 posts
9th Sep '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ravey Candyass:</b>" i really can't even take this seriously. i read that like you're trying to write a short story."</blockquote>



This. I was about to suggest that OP go into writing.

Moxiesbuddy 1 posts
11th Sep '13

Family relationships can certainly be some of the most painful ones. It sounds like your husband is making progress in overcoming some unhealthy patterns, but those changes aren't being respected or honored when he's with his family. I agree with others that limiting your time with this group might be a good step. You don't want to avoid family gatherings altogether or deprive your kids of time with cousins, aunts, uncles, or grandparents. But, part of having good boundaries is avoiding those who are overly critical, stir up old wounds or attack you personally. If they can't be civil and conversations always devolve into conflict, then it's okay to avoid those potentially negative situations. I'm sorry you get caught in the middle, but you have to do what's right to protect your family unit.

Keep up the good work! It's a difficult process to overcome emotional scars and truly get healing from the hurt. Your man was honorable for owning his own emotions and apologizing. None of us is perfect and those who know us best know what buttons to push. I wish you all the best in your peacekeeping efforts.