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Long distance relationships: can it work? Is it worth moving liz1 Spain 42 posts
10th Sep '13

My ex baby daddy and I are working on mending our relationship. Things went down pretty badly when we split before so I am very hesitant but slowly getting closer and letting my guard down.



I still consider myself a single mom because we are not living together and he does not pay any of my bills. I am in the process of going back to school and would need to go for two years. The school I plan to go to is about 3 hours away (as is my job that I currently work on 3 weekends a month)...



Is it a bad idea for me to leave fo 2 years even thogh I would see him every weekend? Would this strain on the relationship make it not worth the move? any suggestiobs on making a long distance relationship work?

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
10th Sep '13
Quoting liz1:" My ex baby daddy and I are working on mending our relationship. Things went down pretty badly when we ... [snip!] ... Would this strain on the relationship make it not worth the move? any suggestiobs on making a long distance relationship work?"


Why not keep your life plans in place. If it ended "badly" then, you don't have a guarntee that it will work now. baby steps.

Super Mommy! Costa Mesa, CA, United States 12671 posts
status 10th Sep '13

That really depends on why you broke up in the first place?

liz1 Spain 42 posts
10th Sep '13

we broke up because we were fighting alot over financial mostly

Lin Brown 2 kids; Tunnel Hill, Georgia 1802 posts
10th Sep '13

depends on what the break up was about in the first place, if it ended badly then it might happen again, mending a relationship back together that ended badly takes a lot of time working together on it, but on the other hand as long as you both put your all into the relationship then yes it could work. I was in a 1800+ mile long distance relationship with my DH for a year on and off for a year before we even met and we are now going on 3 years of marriage and still going strong :)

Bangarang 10 kids; Muthafuckin, GA, United States 26615 posts
10th Sep '13

Do YOU think it's worth it? That's not a far distance at all. SO and I were 12 hours apart for the first year of our relationship and part of that was before we even met. We just had our seven year anniversary. I say carry on your plans and if you guys make it, great!

liz1 Spain 42 posts
10th Sep '13
Quoting Pabst:" Do YOU think it's worth it? That's not a far distance at all. SO and I were 12 hours apart for the first ... [snip!] ... that was before we even met. We just had our seven year anniversary. I say carry on your plans and if you guys make it, great!"

he is really against it. i am enrolled in school where we live currently but i just keep feeling like i should go to school closer to where i work in case i have a car issue or whatever. school and moving foreward with a career is more important to me right now. guess you cant have ur cake and eat it too lol

Mandhee Dhandapani 2 kids; Houston, Texas 574 posts
10th Sep '13

long distant relationship worked for me...he lived in New York i lived here in Houston , TX ..met online ....over two months (after many phone calls and skyping ) he flew over a thousand miles to come see me and stayed for 4 days ...we connected quick...he was sad to leave but promised and proposed he be back..well a month went by and i flew to New York to see him ...stayed 4 nights as well ...we had the most romantic days and nights that i visit ..he took me touring ..etc.. he teared up when i left ...less then a week i was home so sick ...(didnt know i was pregnant at the time ) and he calls and tells me he quit his job found a job in Houston an was on a flight to Texas...he told me he couldn't be with out me any longer....6 months went by we married and on Christmas our daughter was born...its been an amazing 1 yr of marriage and nearly 2 years of being together

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
11th Sep '13
Quoting liz1:" he is really against it. i am enrolled in school where we live currently but i just keep feeling like ... [snip!] ... school and moving foreward with a career is more important to me right now. guess you cant have ur cake and eat it too lol"


My husband and I have always been apart. He was USFS Wildland Fire for 13 years. Our first years dating and being married, his duty station was 1100 miles from our "home". I would go 6 months without seeing him. Then his duty station was 103 miles from home. That had him staying on the compound during his shift and home on days off. Now, he is in the oil field. He is gone anywhere from 10-25 days at a time. We have been married 8 years. Basically what I am saying is that, if it is meant to be it will be. A couple meant to be together will work thru anything TOGETHER. A few hours is nothing. Continue with your plan. If your relationship is to work out, it will weather any storm.

♥Simply Whitney♥ TTC since Dec 2012; 1 child; Australia 932 posts
11th Sep '13

Long Distance definetly isn't for everyone. You need lots of trust. It isn't easy but it can be very worth it. DH and I had one he was in Australia and I was in the US. It can work! Good luck! Lots of skyping!!! :)

liz1 Spain 42 posts
11th Sep '13

well to me it doesnt even seem "long distance" since we will see eachother about as much as we already do..which is not often maybe once or twice a week becuase we dont live together and have conflicting schedules...

ashtonns* 1 child; 1 angel baby; Waynesboro, TN, United States 2162 posts
12th Sep '13

My SO and I have been together over 7 years and have lived together maybe 3years out the time we've been together. He lives two town over (about an hours drive) but we only see each other MAYBE twice a month..all just depends on our work schedules..its has been as much as a month to two months between seeing each other.. it sucks living apart, especially since our daughter asks all the time why we can't live with daddy (long story).. but I am currently working on trying to find a place for me and my daughter to live so we will be able to see him more (right now we live with my step-dad & he doesn't like that we aren't married)



so I think long distance relationships can definitely work. It just takes some extra work from both people and depends on how bad you want to be with that person. It is extremely difficult and lonely at times...but absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?