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Abuse. What do I tell my son? herefornow 1 child; Fayetteville, North Carolina 2059 posts
11th Sep '13

I've been visiting texas for a few months, living with my parents because I thought it was best for my son to have his loving grandparents in his life. My parents are great with my son, and he loves them and being around them. Behind closed doors (when my son is at school) they are constantly yelling at me. About everything. Nothing I do is right in their eyes. Even simple things like having a pile of laundry on my room. I'm 25! Lately our arguments have been escalating, very loud, horrible things are said, it's emotionally draining and abusive.
Today it got physical. My dad shoved me, hit me, and cut my hand with a metal picture frame. I called the cops. I can't press charges because I "started it" by pulling my mothers hair when she took my cell phone and I was trying to get her to turn around and give it back. So technically she can press charges, and my dad was a third party defending her. So no matter how bad the damage on me from my dad, supposedly I can't do anything about it.
I have to get out of here. They're unpredictable and I don't think it's safe to have my son around if this shit is happening (thankfully he was at school today)



But what do i tell my son? I know he is going to miss them. But I don't trust them at all!

loser mom 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Oslo, ,, Norway 10364 posts
11th Sep '13

I wouldn't go into details, just tell him you two need your own place. Also, I probably wouldn't say anything to him until you are actually ready to move out.

~The Lunar Flower~ 2 kids; Alabama 6748 posts
11th Sep '13

Just say you both need your own place. I would warn your parents that they need not say anything to him though.

Life is G♡♡d 21 kids; 16457 posts
11th Sep '13
Quoting loser mom:" I wouldn't go into details, just tell him you two need your own place. Also, I probably wouldn't say anything to him until you are actually ready to move out. "


I agree with this, he doesn't need to know details...Just tell him it's time for he and Mommy to finally move on with their lives and get a bigger and better place that you two can call a home of your own. Good luck hun!

tinana+2 TTC since Nov 2013; 2 kids; Staten Island, NY, United States 29537 posts
11th Sep '13

Yikes :shock: It's their house so I suppose they can have a say in the laundry mess because I know I personally don't want to see people's crap laying around. It sounds toxic through and through. Did you really pull your mom's hair over a cell phone? :shock:



Tell him that you and he are a family and need your own place. Like someone else said- I wouldn't mention it until you find a place.

☮[The Mrs.] FJB Due December 4; 3 kids; North Carolina 14335 posts
11th Sep '13

Once everything is all packed up and ready to go I'd just tell him it's time for you guys to have your own space and own home. I'd wait until you for sure know you are going though. How old is he?

Turt McGurt™ Due November 4 (girl); 33 kids; Maryland 5476 posts
11th Sep '13

I wouldn't tell him anything about the arguments... Just tell him you guys need your own space, and you wanted a change of scenery.

herefornow 1 child; Fayetteville, North Carolina 2059 posts
11th Sep '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ~The Lunar Flower~:</b>" Just say you both need your own place. I would warn your parents that they need not say anything to him though."</blockquote>




It's not so much telling him about getting our own place as it is telling him why we aren't go into be seeing them. They're the only reason we are in texas so we will be going back to michigan...and then likely not coming back for a while, possibly never?

~The Lunar Flower~ 2 kids; Alabama 6748 posts
11th Sep '13
Quoting herefornow:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ~The Lunar Flower~:</b>" Just say you both need your own place. ... [snip!] ... only reason we are in texas so we will be going back to michigan...and then likely not coming back for a while, possibly never?"

Oh well, then just tell him it's time to move on to a new adventurous chapter in life. How old is he?

☮[The Mrs.] FJB Due December 4; 3 kids; North Carolina 14335 posts
11th Sep '13
Quoting herefornow:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ~The Lunar Flower~:</b>" Just say you both need your own place. ... [snip!] ... only reason we are in texas so we will be going back to michigan...and then likely not coming back for a while, possibly never?"


Depending on his age he may just get over it. Do you have family in Michigan? Do you guys move a lot?

herefornow 1 child; Fayetteville, North Carolina 2059 posts
11th Sep '13

Also we left and at staying with friends until we can leave texas. I told him that his grandparents are sick and that why we couldn't go him after school.



Maybe when the dust settles we can both go over there and get our things and say goodbye. But I'm shocked that my dad did this and terrified of what he's capable of.

herefornow 1 child; Fayetteville, North Carolina 2059 posts
11th Sep '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ~The Lunar Flower~:</b>" Oh well, then just tell him it's time to move on to a new adventurous chapter in life. How old is he?"</blockquote>



He's four.

mommy to C, B and F 19 kids; 1 angel baby; Escondido, California 1175 posts
11th Sep '13

Went through the same thing my my dad would yell in front of my kids and actully at my kids even hit my ds once so we just packed and left I told them we told them the truth that grandpa was a bad man and we couldnt live there anymore and they understood and it hasnt phased them be honest but vague about it we also got the cops involved I pressed charged cause he hit me tryig to gt m phone outta my hand while I tried to call dh to come home but I later dropped the charges cause my mom was very sick and it was causing her too much stress I still refuse to talk to him its been over a year my kids remember and still talk to grandma bt they neer say a damn word abot him and ima keep it that way and if they do ask I say he was a bad man and they go oh ok ya and hata that they remember but have been great about not let it effect them I really wish you luck in all his and I hope you can leave asap

1inpink2inblue Switzerland 11957 posts
11th Sep '13

One day he might understand but it is really up to you how much you tell him. GL whatever happens.

herefornow 1 child; Fayetteville, North Carolina 2059 posts
11th Sep '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting ☮[The Mrs.] FJB:</b>" Depending on his age he may just get over it. Do you have family in Michigan? Do you guys move a lot?"</blockquote>



He's four. My fianc