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Breastfeeding...Father says no I say yes! Kristin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Sauk Rapids, MN, United States 31 posts
7th Feb '14

Mike and I are not together and we are expecting a child in April. I want to breastfeed at least part time. Mike's family doesn't want me to because of us having every other weekend visitation rights. And because then Mike can't just take the baby when he wants to. It really bothers me they feel they have the right to tell me what I can do and not do.

So I am just wondering if anyone else had this issue. What should I do? This is my first child and I do want to experience breastfeeding. Also, will it confuse the baby to both breast feed and bottle feed? I'm a new mom and have no idea what I'm doing!

Kelly&Coralie 1 child; Rochester, NY, United States 56009 posts
7th Feb '14

I would just breast feed

and honestly, I don't know many mothers that would let overnight visitations as an infant. He can see the baby during the day. You can pump a few bottles of milk for him to take, but overnights would be out of the question for me

Backwoods 1 child; ........, .., United States 17229 posts
7th Feb '14

I would breast feed and pump for when baby won't be with you. 

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 47188 posts
status 7th Feb '14

Who cares what his family thinks?

If you can breastfeed, breastfeed.

JΔ$ Georgia 78791 posts
7th Feb '14

Its really not their decision to make. If you want to BF then you should. 

Most people say not to introduce a bottle to a breastfed baby until you have established a good supply. I know of some moms who had no problems with nursing and bottle feeding early on. I breast fed my son and he never took a bottle. Not from me or anyone else. I tried various American brand bottles and German bottles, he wasn't having it. So you have to keep that in mind also. 

Kristin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Sauk Rapids, MN, United States 31 posts
7th Feb '14

It won't confuse the baby to have both bottle and breast?

JΔ$ Georgia 78791 posts
7th Feb '14

Quoting Kristin:
It won't confuse the baby to have both bottle and breast?


It could but its not definite. 

Kelly&Coralie 1 child; Rochester, NY, United States 56009 posts
7th Feb '14

Quoting Kristin:
It won't confuse the baby to have both bottle and breast?


It depends on the baby

Some kids go back and forth easily, other kids won't take a bottle at all. 

notafullbagofsugar 2 kids; 2 angel babies; cheshire, uk, United Kingdom 3656 posts
7th Feb '14

i would put your foot down and do what you think is right, your babys needs come first, i am not sure where you are but here in the uk health visitors do not recommend over night stays with new borns breastfed or formula fed as they believe they should stay with their mother for the first few weeks (not sure how long for exactly)

kayybby [BBM] Due June 17; 1 child; 1 angel baby; pittsburgh, PA, United States 3100 posts
7th Feb '14

Quoting Kristin:
Mike and I are not together and we are expecting a child in April. I want to breastfeed at least part time. Mike's family doesn't want me to because of us having every other weekend visitation rights. And because then Mike can't just take the baby when he wants to. It really bothers me they feel they have the right to tell me what I can do and not do.

So I am just wondering if anyone else had this issue. What should I do? This is my first child and I do want to experience breastfeeding. Also, will it confuse the baby to both breast feed and bottle feed? I'm a new mom and have no idea what I'm doing!


your up to over night visits with a new born? ive never ran into a mother comfortable with that. and personally i wouldn't advise it. I'd breast feed, really sounds like they could reap from the benefits it has to the child if they educated themselves rather than be selfish. which is what they sound like imo. breast feed, and pump for the couple hours of visitation, overnights can be discussed on a future date when lo's less fragile and dependent.

Ravey Candyass 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Boston, Massachusetts 105463 posts
7th Feb '14

Do what you want.  I wouldn't give visitation that early on anyways. Wait until 6 weeks to introduce a bottle so you don't confuse baby

AxylRose 2 kids; Australia 2130 posts
7th Feb '14

Can I just ask why women are so against overnights as newborns, babies depend on their fathers just as much and if a person is comfortable with the father taking the baby what's the problem? I would trust my partner even if we broke up, he is an unbelievable Dad and does so much for our kids. We honestly aren't any more important than fathers just because we carried the baby and we have b**bs.

JenJoCo 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Cleveland, TN, United States 905 posts
7th Feb '14

I agree with the other ladies. If you want to breastfeed, you most certainly should! It's so much better for your baby! 1 teaspoon of breast milk has 3 million antibodies! Plus, it has TONS of other wonderful things in it that you can't get from formula. With my first 2 daughters I breastfed and pumped since I had to go back to work soon after. They had no problem with taking either the bottle or the breast. It just depends on your baby. Don't let anyone bully you into anything when it comes to your baby! You know what's best, momma!

JΔ$ Georgia 78791 posts
7th Feb '14

Quoting AxylRose:
Can I just ask why women are so against overnights as newborns, babies depend on their fathers just as much and if a person is comfortable with the father taking the baby what's the problem? I would trust my partner even if we broke up, he is an unbelievable Dad and does so much for our kids. We honestly aren't any more important than fathers just because we carried the baby and we have b**bs.


IMO, its not about trust. Its about what the situation and what's best for baby. If baby is breast fed and won't take a bottle then daddy obviously can't have overnight visits. 

I don't agree when people say that baby shouldn't be away from mom overnight during the first year. I think that they shouldn't be away from their caregivers which would include mom and/or dad. 

MommyToBeToAPrincess Due May 16 (girl); San Antonio, TX, United States 30 posts
7th Feb '14

We'll they should keep in mind it's not about them but about the baby. And if you can breast feed you should, it's better for the baby most importantly but also for you.