I don't usually share super personal things on here but I have to let this out somewhere.
I was driving today and I saw a car that looked just like yours. She looked just like you with her hair blowing in the wind and a smile on her face.
It it was like a punch in the stomach. It couldn't be you. That will never be you again. You're gone. It's been 7 years and I still have such a hard time accepting that you're gone.
I remember getting that phone call, that you had been in a car accident. I was sitting in the gym parking lot. Charly called me crying but it still didn't register with me that it was serious.
"she's going to be fine. Maybe some stitches, a cast at the most. Maybe we should pick up a card before we get there."
I was so young and naive. We were invincible.
Getting to the hospital, seeing everyone crying. It still didn't register.
Finally being allowed back to go see you. Seeing you hooked up on those machines in the ICU. I held your hand and told you everything would be okay. To keep fighting. I went to kiss your hand and I noticed all the dried blood on your fingers. The blood that was stuck in the engagement ring that none of us even knew about yet.
Thats when it hit me. That's when I opened my eyes and realized that you weren't breathing on your own. Your eyes had no movement. I stood up and your hand slipped out of mine and that sound made it that made as it hit the bed made it more real. You weren't going to be okay. Nothing was ever going to be okay again.
waiting in the waiting room after that, I knew what the doctor would say before he said it. "There's no brain function. I'm sorry but there is nothing that we can do."
My body went numb. The next several days went by in a blur. I remember crying a lot. I remember dreaming about you. Hearing you crying in my room.
I remember going to your funeral. Waiting for you to jump out of your casket, flashing that smile at everyone and telling us it was all just a bad nightmare.
But it never came. That never happened. Instead we had to bury my best friend. We had to walk away and leave you alone to go to a place that none of us could join you in.
Going back back and seeing your car after your funeral. Seeing the blood everywhere. The way the front end was completely crushed into the back seat. There was never any hope of walking away from that.
seven years later and my heart still aches. I miss you. So much, my dear friend.
Oh hun my heart aches for you. Sorry for your loss <3
So sorry for your loss.
This gave me goosebumps. I'm so sorry for your loss :(
Oh my god Christina this made me cry my eyes out <3 <3 <3
you keep on being strong!!
Hugs, C. <3 Thinking about you.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend :(
I am so sorry love. <3
This made me tear :(
I'm sorry for your loss. <3
I'm so sorry for your loss. <3
Love you, babe <3